HAMMERCRAWL!

Ep030: Dungeon Full of Monsters Part 3: Definitely Cat Magic

Mon, 16 Sep 2019 23:00:29 -0000

WOO HOO, NATALIE IS BACK! We missed her greatly, and are super extra ULTRA DRAGON PUNCH EDITION* happy to have her join us again for HAMMERCRAWL! This episode is our third recording session of the ongoing new DUNGEON FULL OF MONSTERS! In this installment of the adventures of THE CRIMSON THORNS, we learn that feline mysteries are afoot, indeed. A new party member joins the crew after a brief visit back to town, and the party gets there, aha, fingers in more than one Chaos Pie...

Oh yeah: do you like mimes? I hope you like mimes. This episode's got mimes, miming mightily.

* The one with the pre-order bonus of an alternate hide color for Vovine the Bovine, of course.

Drop us a line! You can follow us on Twitter and Instagram as "Breakfastpuppy" or email NPC directly as NPC at Breakfastpuppies dot com. We have a Discord Channel and a Facebook Page, too! And let us know your thoughts by leaving a review on iTunes! For even more info and options, check out our main website or our new low-bandwidth alternative feed site.

Links of Note:

The Dungeon Full of Monsters
The Garbage Goons
The Donjon: your one-stop site for all things random
Dungeon Cartography Cards from Undercity Games
The GameMaster's Apprentice Cards by Larcenous Designs
Monster Mod Cards by Fatbelly Press
Encounter Building Cards (Traps & Locations) by Eric Bright

Credits:

HAMMERSMITH: NPC
Players: Lady Coquine as "Pepper Graveworm," Scott as "Roland Cockfinger," The Mad Marquis as "Arthictor," Kylee as "Inky Kowalski", Natalie as "Brienne McKnight"
Group Name: The Crimson Thorns
Dungeon: Skull Mountain (The Dungeon Full of Monsters)
Theme Song: "Chain Lightning" by Gygax
Additional Music by: Erang - Featured song A Majestic Shadow
Game Rules: Available for free on Github!
Daily Wisdom: Just fill that clam with some chaos kombucha, throw in a severed chaos leg, and hope for the best!

Episode Length: 02:34:01 (we support Chapter Marks!)

Want to throw us a tip? Every little bit helps pay the bills! Check us out on Patreon, or instead just follow this link to our Pinecast Tip Jar!

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Ep029: Dungeon Full of Monsters Part 2: Two Mollusks and a Dwarf

Mon, 09 Sep 2019 23:00:39 -0000

Our special new extended campaign continues with its second session, here on the HAMMERCRAWL! comedic dungeon crawl podcast! While our process is usually 100% generated on the fly through a mix of improv and quick-draw cards, for this campaign we're using the wonderful DUNGEON FULL OF MONSTERS (by Johnstone Metzger) as the underlying dungeon into which our probably-doomed adventurers are delving. Will Spandrel's will bring order to this chaotic cesspit of evil? Will anyone manage to escape with their limbs intact? Tune in and find out!

Links of Note:

The Dungeon Full of Monsters
The Donjon: your one-stop site for all things random
Dungeon Cartography Cards from Undercity Games
The GameMaster's Apprentice Cards by Larcenous Designs
Monster Mod Cards by Fatbelly Press
Encounter Building Cards (Traps & Locations) by Eric Bright

Credits:

HAMMERSMITH: NPC
Players: Lady Coquine as "Pepper Graveworm," Scott as "Roland Cockfinger," The Mad Marquis as "Arthictor," Kylee as "Inky Kowalski"
Group Name: The Crimson Thorns
Dungeon: Skull Mountain (The Dungeon Full of Monsters)
Theme Song: "Chain Lightning" by Gygax
Additional Music by: Erang - Featured song A Majestic Shadow
Game Rules: Available for free on Github!
Daily Wisdom: When confronted with a pool of shimmering dungeon LSD, you drink that shit.

Episode Length: 02:37:17 (we support Chapter Marks!)

Want to throw us a tip? Every little bit helps pay the bills! Check us out on Patreon, or instead just follow this link to our Pinecast Tip Jar!

Send us your feedback online: https://pinecast.com/feedback/hammercrawl/8301cf76-4182-481f-a9f2-d1a1373f3b98

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Ep028: Dungeon Full of Monsters Part 1: That Garlic-Flesh Smell

Thu, 15 Aug 2019 20:52:55 -0000

Welcome to the beginning of a whole new adventure on the HAMMERCRAWL! comedic dungeon crawl podcast! As always, every aspect of our play is randomly generated via a mix of random tables, inspirational cards, and pure unfiltered improvisation. This time, however, we're changing things up a bit by taking a stab at an actual published dungeon: the excellent DUNGEON FULL OF MONSTERS by Johnstone Metzger! This dungeon is a perfect component for HAMMERCRAWL!-style gaming, as the entire structure and flow of it is driven by its own random tables, right down to how the very dungeon rooms are assembled.

Starting with this episode we're also switching to a full-session release format. This means each episode will encapsulate an entire play session, resulting in longer episodes that listeners can digest at their own leisure. The files are a tad longer, and the releases will be spaced out by a couple of weeks as a result.

Anyway, we have an excellent cast of players once again, and hope you enjoy listening to our chaotic adventures as much as we enjoyed rolling them!

Links of Note:

The Dungeon Full of Monsters
The Donjon: your one-stop site for all things random
Dungeon Cartography Cards from Undercity Games
The GameMaster's Apprentice Cards by Larcenous Designs
Monster Mod Cards by Fatbelly Press
Encounter Building Cards (Traps & Locations) by Eric Bright

Credits:

HAMMERSMITH: NPC
Players: Lady Coquine as "Pepper Graveworm," Scott as "Roland Cockfinger," The Mad Marquis as "Arthictor," Kylee as "Inky Kowalski"
Group Name: The Crimson Thorns
Dungeon: Skull Mountain (The Dungeon Full of Monsters)
Theme Song: "Chain Lightning" by Gygax
Additional Music by: Erang - Featured song A Majestic Shadow
Game Rules: Available for free on Github!
Daily Wisdom: With a shovel and a dwarf, you pretty much know where you are at any time.

Episode Length: 02:33:43 (we support Chapter Marks!)

Want to throw us a tip? Every little bit helps pay the bills! Check us out on Patreon, or instead just follow this link to our Pinecast Tip Jar!

Send us your feedback online: https://pinecast.com/feedback/hammercrawl/f7ca265e-dcdc-4ae9-88f4-037b1b0dcc01

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Ep027: Gamestorm 2019 Part 3: Feelings are Healthy

Mon, 05 Aug 2019 02:10:51 -0000

The Gamestorm 2019 live event recording now concludes in the third and final part of this saga. This three-parter was recorded at the Gamestorm convention this past March, right here in Portland, Oregon. As with all of our convention and one-shot gaming events, this game was played "hot seat" style, with new players rotating in every time a party member died in the dungeon. It's always a roaring good time, and this event was no exception! So we hope you enjoy yet another delve into the randomly-generated insanity of HAMMERCRAWL!

Links of Note:

Gamestorm Convention
Dungeon Cartography Cards from Undercity Games
The GameMaster's Apprentice Cards by Larcenous Designs
Monster Mod Cards by Fatbelly Press
Encounter Building Cards (Traps & Locations) by Eric Bright

Credits:

HAMMERSMITH: NPC
Players: Sara McNaughton as "Belinda Carbuckle", Aaron Bowman as "Alousicious Wrinklesnort Esq. III", Matt Buckley as "Missy", Rodney as "Bellatronixx the Magna-Focused", Tom as "Odell Lourapple", Paula as "All Might", Brandon as "Honko the Glorious", Dan as "Shanghai Sally", and Tyson as "Helga Cruciform"
Group Name: The Fangs of Hodeitsir
Dungeon: The Dungeon of Democratic Necromancy
Theme Song: "Chain Lightning" by Gygax
Additional Music by: Erang - Featured song A Majestic Shadow
Game Rules: Available for free on Github!
Daily Wisdom: When both of the berzerkers in your party get that red-eyed stare, it's time to run far, far away...

Episode Length: 30:07 (we support Chapter Marks!)

Want to throw us a tip? Every little bit helps pay the bills! Check us out on Patreon, or instead just follow this link to our Pinecast Tip Jar!

Send us your feedback online: https://pinecast.com/feedback/hammercrawl/db555cd4-dbe3-4630-b657-a9cd0e40266d

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Ep026: Gamestorm 2019 Part 2: The Bone Golem Hates Cats

Mon, 29 Jul 2019 02:09:41 -0000

The Gamestorm 2019 live event recording continues in part two! This three-parter was recorded at the Gamestorm convention this past March, right here in Portland, Oregon. As with all of our convention and one-shot gaming events, this game was played "hot seat" style, with new players rotating in every time a party member died in the dungeon. It's always a roaring good time, and this event was no exception! So we hope you enjoy yet another delve into the randomly-generated insanity of HAMMERCRAWL!

Links of Note:

Gamestorm Convention
Dungeon Cartography Cards from Undercity Games
The GameMaster's Apprentice Cards by Larcenous Designs
Monster Mod Cards by Fatbelly Press
Encounter Building Cards (Traps & Locations) by Eric Bright

Credits:

HAMMERSMITH: NPC
Players: Sara McNaughton as "Belinda Carbuckle", Aaron Bowman as "Alousicious Wrinklesnort Esq. III", Matt Buckley as "Missy", Rodney as "Bellatronixx the Magna-Focused", Tom as "Odell Lourapple", Paula as "All Might", Brandon as "Honko the Glorious", Dan as "Shanghai Sally", and Tyson as "Helga Cruciform"
Group Name: The Fangs of Hodeitsir
Dungeon: The Dungeon of Democratic Necromancy
Theme Song: "Chain Lightning" by Gygax
Additional Music by: Erang - Featured song A Majestic Shadow
Game Rules: Available for free on Github!
Daily Wisdom: In a pinch, tying a live cat to your face can make for an excellent poison gas filter.

Episode Length: 54:31 (we support Chapter Marks!)

Want to throw us a tip? Every little bit helps pay the bills! Check us out on Patreon, or instead just follow this link to our Pinecast Tip Jar!

Send us your feedback online: https://pinecast.com/feedback/hammercrawl/aef37181-334f-4849-a45a-513c5c8b1379

This podcast is powered by Pinecast.

Ep025: Gamestorm 2019 Part 1: The Bacon was a Lie

Mon, 22 Jul 2019 02:01:31 -0000

Welcome adventurers to another set of special live recordings! This time around, we're bringing you a three-parter recorded at the Gamestorm convention this past March, right here in Portland, Oregon. As with all of our convention and one-shot gaming events, this game was played "hot seat" style, with new players rotating in every time a party member died in the dungeon. It's always a roaring good time, and this event was no exception! So we hope you enjoy yet another delve into the randomly-generated insanity of HAMMERCRAWL!

Links of Note:

Gamestorm Convention
Dungeon Cartography Cards from Undercity Games
The GameMaster's Apprentice Cards by Larcenous Designs
Monster Mod Cards by Fatbelly Press
Encounter Building Cards (Traps & Locations) by Eric Bright

Credits:

HAMMERSMITH: NPC
Players: Sara McNaughton as "Belinda Carbuckle", Aaron Bowman as "Alousicious Wrinklesnort Esq. III", Matt Buckley as "Missy", Rodney as "Bellatronixx the Magna-Focused", Tom as "Odell Lourapple", Paula as "All Might", Brandon as "Honko the Glorious", Dan as "Shanghai Sally", and Tyson as "Helga Cruciform"
Group Name: The Fangs of Hodeitsir
Dungeon: The Dungeon of Democratic Necromancy
Theme Song: "Chain Lightning" by Gygax
Additional Music by: Erang - Featured song A Majestic Shadow
Game Rules: Available for free on Github!
Daily Wisdom: One does not simply Mime one's way out of a dungeon.

Episode Length: 49:12 (we support Chapter Marks!)

Want to throw us a tip? Every little bit helps pay the bills! Check us out on Patreon, or instead just follow this link to our Pinecast Tip Jar!

Send us your feedback online: https://pinecast.com/feedback/hammercrawl/9bb13b12-bd8e-4d90-ac61-8faba1da92c4

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Ep024: WAGONCRAWL 2019! Part 5: Good Night, Sweet Gary

Mon, 08 Jul 2019 23:55:25 -0000

We are thrilled to finally present you with the fifth and final installment of the grand WAGONCRAWL! 2019 live stage recording. Care to take bets on who in the final lineup will survive?

Another HUGE thanks to the Wagoncon crew for letting us put on this awesome event at this past 2019 convention, right here in the Columbia Gorge. We have a fantastic time every time we go, and we're looking forward to more gaming excitement come 2020!

Coming up next in the feed is yet another live event recording, this time from the recent 2019 Gamestorm convention, held every Spring in Portland, OR. Stay tuned for more HAMMERCRAWL!

As explained in the introduction, we had a bit of an echo problem in the space where we were recording. As such, these have taken an extra special amount of care while editing in order to get them to sound just right. We apologize if any irritating sound artifacts made it into the recording, we did our best to zap them all.

Links of Note:

Dungeon Cartography Cards from Undercity Games
The GameMaster's Apprentice Cards by Larcenous Designs
Monster Mod Cards by Fatbelly Press
Encounter Building Cards (Traps & Locations) by Eric Bright
DM Screen by Arbitrary Crafts

Credits:

HAMMERSMITH: NPC
Players: Matt as "Barnabus Ladyfingers," Sara as "Twitchy Two-Fingers", Master Blaster as "Jarvis Jiggles," and Rob Smith as "Greasefinger the 2nd" aka "Deuce"
Group Name: Scooper's Bears
Dungeon: The WAGONCRAWL! (via The Secret Chambers of Evil)
Theme Song: "Chain Lightning" by Gygax
Additional Music by: Erang - Featured song A Majestic Shadow
Game Rules: Available for free on Github!
Daily Wisdom: In old school games, it's best to think of combat as a "failure state;" if initiative is rolled, then you've probably already lost.

Episode Length: 50:02 (we support Chapter Marks!)

Want to throw us a tip? Every little bit helps pay the bills! Check us out on Patreon, or instead just follow this link to our Pinecast Tip Jar!

Send us your feedback online: https://pinecast.com/feedback/hammercrawl/3801bba8-4327-49e9-b902-32846c341bed

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Ep023: WAGONCRAWL 2019! Part 4: My Little Corner of Shame

Mon, 24 Jun 2019 01:44:19 -0000

And the WAGONCRAWL! 2019 event continues! In this fifth episode, recorded live at Wagoncon in The Dalles, Oregon, two new players try their hand at surviving the dungeon, raising the Total Active Halfling Count to 3. Can we go for four?

Links of Note:

Dungeon Cartography Cards from Undercity Games
The GameMaster's Apprentice Cards by Larcenous Designs
Monster Mod Cards by Fatbelly Press
Encounter Building Cards (Traps & Locations) by Eric Bright
DM Screen by Arbitrary Crafts

Credits:

HAMMERSMITH: NPC
Players: Ross Hammer as "Bavel Dawn," Matt as "Barnabus Ladyfingers," Connor as "Jose Greasefinger," Sara as "Twitchy Two-Fingers", and Master Blaster as "Jarvis Jiggles"
Group Name: Scooper's Bears
Dungeon: The WAGONCRAWL! (via The Secret Chambers of Evil)
Theme Song: "Chain Lightning" by Gygax
Additional Music by: Erang - Featured song A Majestic Shadow
Game Rules: Available for free on Github!
Daily Wisdom: Remember to always be on the lookout for secret rooms, as well as stuff that falls from places and things and stuff.

Episode Length: 27:41 (we support Chapter Marks!)

Want to throw us a tip? Every little bit helps pay the bills! Check us out on Patreon, or instead just follow this link to our Pinecast Tip Jar!

Send us your feedback online: https://pinecast.com/feedback/hammercrawl/db3d689b-547c-4c19-8117-9d86db3dc9c0

This podcast is powered by Pinecast.

Ep022: WAGONCRAWL 2019! Part 3: We Have Become Gods

Mon, 17 Jun 2019 18:48:18 -0000

WAGONCRAWL! 2019 continues in this third episode of the special event, recorded live at Wagoncon in The Dalles, Oregon. Will the new Halfling's streak of good luck continue to bless the party? Listen in and find out!

Links of Note:

Dungeon Cartography Cards from Undercity Games
The GameMaster's Apprentice Cards by Larcenous Designs
Monster Mod Cards by Fatbelly Press
Encounter Building Cards (Traps & Locations) by Eric Bright
DM Screen by Arbitrary Crafts

Credits:

HAMMERSMITH: NPC
Players: Ross Hammer as "Bavel Dawn," Matt as "Barnabus Ladyfingers," Sean as "Burly Hammerbeard," and Connor as "Jose Greasefinger"
Group Name: Scooper's Bears
Dungeon: The WAGONCRAWL! (via The Secret Chambers of Evil)
Theme Song: "Chain Lightning" by Gygax
Additional Music by: Erang - Featured song A Majestic Shadow
Game Rules: Available for free on Github!
Daily Wisdom: Sometimes you gotta just throw caution to the darkness, seize the moment, and 'ride the frog' man.

Episode Length: 30:45 (we support Chapter Marks!)

Want to throw us a tip? Every little bit helps pay the bills! Check us out on Patreon, or instead just follow this link to our Pinecast Tip Jar!

Send us your feedback online: https://pinecast.com/feedback/hammercrawl/202159e1-bb56-46ed-bf1e-63b2be9ff23d

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Ep021: WAGONCRAWL 2019! Part 2: Two Halflings, a Wizard, and a Clown

Mon, 10 Jun 2019 17:52:24 -0000

The super-awesome 2019 WAGONCRAWL! live adventure continues with this second episode! Recorded on stage at Wagoncon 2019 in The Dalles, Oregon. Will Lady Deathfinger's replacement bring a better round of luck to Scooper's Bears as they venture deeper into THE SECRET CHAMBERS OF EVIL? Listen in and find out on this next episode of THE WAGONCRAWL! (ominous music)

Links of Note:

Dungeon Cartography Cards from Undercity Games
The GameMaster's Apprentice Cards by Larcenous Designs
Monster Mod Cards by Fatbelly Press
Encounter Building Cards (Traps & Locations) by Eric Bright
DM Screen by Arbitrary Crafts

Credits:

HAMMERSMITH: NPC
Players: Ross Hammer as "Bavel Dawn," Matt as "Barnabus Ladyfingers," Sean as "Burly Hammerbeard," and Connor as "Jose Greasefinger"
Group Name: Scooper's Bears
Dungeon: The WAGONCRAWL! (via The Secret Chambers of Evil)
Theme Song: "Chain Lightning" by Gygax
Additional Music by: Erang - Featured song A Majestic Shadow
Game Rules: Available for free on Github!
Daily Wisdom: When somebody asks to be tied up with chain, you don't ask them why. You just help them.

Episode Length: 27:41 (we support Chapter Marks!)

Want to throw us a tip? Every little bit helps pay the bills! Check us out on Patreon, or instead just follow this link to our Pinecast Tip Jar!

Send us your feedback online: https://pinecast.com/feedback/hammercrawl/84274285-d26f-459e-8522-f4c03a9876a5

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Ep020: WAGONCRAWL 2019! Part 1: Lady Deathfinger Does Not Do Gross

Mon, 03 Jun 2019 21:53:06 -0000

AT LONG LAST, WE RETURN! Sorry for the long wait, folks! The Breakfast Puppies setup has recently undergone a complete studio move and upgrade, which has taken a lot more work than initially planned. But after a break for the convention season, we're back to regular releases of HAMMERCRAWL! This time we bring you the first of the new WAGONCRAWL! adventures, recorded live on stage at Wagoncon 2019, right here in the beautiful Columbia Gorge. We had an awesome turnout of folks ready to cycle through the meatgrinder, scoring us a good handful of episodes to roll out for your listening enjoyment.

Links of Note:

Dungeon Cartography Cards from Undercity Games
The GameMaster's Apprentice Cards by Larcenous Designs
Monster Mod Cards by Fatbelly Press
Encounter Building Cards (Traps & Locations) by Eric Bright
DM Screen by Arbitrary Crafts

Credits:

HAMMERSMITH: NPC
Players: Ross Hammer as "Bavel Dawn," Janell as "Lady Enu Deathbringer," Sean as "Burly Hammerbeard," and Connor as "Jose Greasefinger"
Group Name: Scooper's Bears
Dungeon: The WAGONCRAWL! (via The Secret Chambers of Evil)
Theme Song: "Chain Lightning" by Gygax
Additional Music by: Erang - Featured song A Majestic Shadow
Game Rules: Available for free on Github!
Daily Wisdom: The renowned hatred between Clowns and Potted Plants may be something you can use to your advantage.

Episode Length: 37:34 (we support Chapter Marks!)

Want to throw us a tip? Every little bit helps pay the bills! Check us out on Patreon, or instead just follow this link to our Pinecast Tip Jar!

Send us your feedback online: https://pinecast.com/feedback/hammercrawl/cbbd5f89-2330-4e69-82cf-794e3310a8ed

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Ep019: WoZ Part 16 - The Sleep Sack

Mon, 04 Mar 2019 07:00:00 -0000

In this episode of HAMMERCRAWL!, the group learns some very important tactics when dealing with an enraged half-ogre. This wraps up another batch of episodes in the ongoing saga of THE WOLVES OF ZARAMUND as they continue deeper into THE PIT OF TENEBROUS WORMS. We'll see you next time!

Credits:

HAMMERSMITH: NPC
Players: Lady Coquine as "Delphine the Delver," Natalie as "Dominion Chester Killfrogger," Poppy Beaujolais as "Draug the Vengeful," and Jessie Dettwiler as "ZayNon the Mono-Unsaturated"
Group Name: The Wolves of Zaramund
Dungeon: The Pit of Tenebrous Worms
Theme Song: "Chain Lightning" by Gygax
Additional Music by: Erang - Featured songs: A Majestic Shadow, In the Hall of the Eternal Darkness
Game Rules: Available for free on Github!
Daily Wisdom: Remember: In the middle of combat, eating a dead worm is a full round action.

Episode Length: 34:13 (we support Chapter Marks!)

Support HAMMERCRAWL! by donating to their Tip Jar: https://tips.pinecast.com/jar/hammercrawl

Find out more at https://hammercrawl.pinecast.co

Send us your feedback online: https://pinecast.com/feedback/hammercrawl/d8bf5c88-3ab8-4af8-898a-2ca5365f5d2a

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Ep018: WoZ Part 15 - Butt Touching

Mon, 25 Feb 2019 05:05:03 -0000

In the newest episode of the ongoing saga of THE WOLVES OF ZARAMUND, our crew gets up close and personal with some very angry tentacles in THE PIT OF TENEBROUS WORMS, in a very unpleasant way. No, not that way. Stop that. Don't be gross. It's another exciting and hilarious episode of HAMMERCRAWL, the procedurally-generated dungeon crawl podcast!

Credits:

HAMMERSMITH: NPC
Players: Lady Coquine as "Delphine the Delver," Natalie as "Dominion Chester Killfrogger," Poppy Beaujolais as "Draug the Vengeful," and Jessie Dettwiler as "ZayNon the Mono-Unsaturated"
Group Name: The Wolves of Zaramund
Dungeon: The Pit of Tenebrous Worms
Theme Song: "Chain Lightning" by Gygax
Additional Music by: Erang - Featured songs: A Majestic Shadow, Vortex
Game Rules: Available for free on Github!
Daily Wisdom: Don't forget to pack some chalk: the more you eat, the healthier you become!

Episode Length: 33:20 (we support Chapter Marks!):

Support HAMMERCRAWL! by donating to their Tip Jar: https://tips.pinecast.com/jar/hammercrawl

Find out more at https://hammercrawl.pinecast.co

Send us your feedback online: https://pinecast.com/feedback/hammercrawl/63b0e185-2d7f-4477-8d4b-1ffbbd25ec6c

This podcast is powered by Pinecast.

Ep017: WoZ Part 14 - I HATE CUBES!

Sat, 23 Feb 2019 05:53:04 -0000

It's time for another exciting episode of HAMMERCRAWL, the procedurally-generated comedic dungeon crawl podcast! Picking up where we left off, the WOLVES OF ZARAMUND move ever-so-slightly forward on their first venture into THE PIT OF TENEBROUS WORMS. Having dealt with the slimy guardian of the first chamber, Dom makes up their mind on the nature of gelatinous cubes. The rest of the party makes important discovers on methods of dental hygiene while dungeon crawling.

For this new batch, we're back to releasing the episodes weekly (well, more or less), instead of the binge-release format we used for the last few batches. The player lineup has changed a bit, and we welcome new player Jessie to the bunch!

Credits:

HAMMERSMITH: NPC
Players: Lady Coquine as "Delphine the Delver," Natalie as "Dominion Chester Killfrogger," Poppy Beaujolais as "Draug the Vengeful," and Jessie Dettwiler as "ZayNon the Mono-Unsaturated"
Group Name: The Wolves of Zaramund
Dungeon: The Pit of Tenebrous Worms
Theme Song: "Chain Lightning" by Gygax
Additional Music by: Erang - Featured songs: A Majestic Shadow, The Loneliness of the Giant Buffalo
Game Rules: Available for free on Github!
Daily Wisdom: In a pinch, a gelatinous cube can make for an excellent mid-dungeon cure for that not-so fresh feeling.

Episode Length: 35:07 (we support Chapter Marks!)

Support HAMMERCRAWL! by donating to their Tip Jar: https://tips.pinecast.com/jar/hammercrawl

Find out more at https://hammercrawl.pinecast.co

Send us your feedback online: https://pinecast.com/feedback/hammercrawl/64c043f4-e234-4acd-9724-700b5ec4ad57

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Ep016: WoZ Part 13 - Elfsplaining

Tue, 05 Feb 2019 13:31:58 -0000

The saga of THE WOLVES OF ZARAMUND continues on HAMMERCRAWL!, the procedurally-generated comedic dungeon crawl podcast. We return to the ongoing story of the Wolves on their newest adventure, delving further into THE PIT OF TENEBROUS WORMS! In this episode, learn of the dangers of poking strange statues in weird dungeons, and experience the majesty of the GLITTERING STRIKE!

For this new batch, we're back to releasing the episodes weekly, instead of the binge-release format we used for the last few batches. The player lineup has changed a bit, and we welcome new player Jessie to the bunch!

Links of Note:

Credits:

HAMMERSMITH: NPC
Players: Lady Coquine as "Delphine the Delver," Natalie as "Dominion Chester Killfrogger," Poppy Beaujolais as "Draug the Vengeful," and Jessie Dettwiler as "ZayNon the Mono-Unsaturated"
Group Name: The Wolves of Zaramund
Dungeon: The Pit of Tenebrous Worms
Theme Song: "Chain Lightning" by Gygax
Additional Music by: Erang - Featured songs: A Majestic Shadow, Forever Trapped Within the Arakno Kastle Katacombs
Game Rules: Available for free on Github!
Daily Wisdom: When encountering strange statues of evil tentacle people, give 'em a good poke, that always works out.

Episode Length: 24:10 (we support Chapter Marks!):

Support HAMMERCRAWL! by donating to their Tip Jar: https://tips.pinecast.com/jar/hammercrawl

Find out more at https://hammercrawl.pinecast.co

Send us your feedback online: https://pinecast.com/feedback/hammercrawl/3389c55b-28d3-4646-bcc9-5e79a03b80bf

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Ep015: WoZ Part 12 - Another Form of Failure

Wed, 30 Jan 2019 01:13:35 -0000

Welcome back to another episode of HAMMERCRAWL! the 100% randomly-generated comedic actual play podcast. After a bit of a break, the Wolves of Zaramund are finally back on the mics with a new adventure! Having given up on the Black Lair of the Vampire Count after suffering a few team losses, the remnants of their team gathers together for another foray into a brand new dungeon: THE PIT OF TENEBROUS WORMS!

Credits:

HAMMERSMITH: NPC
Players: Lady Coquine as "Delphine the Delver," Natalie as "Dominion Chester Killfrogger," Poppy Beaujolais as "Draug the Vengeful," and Jessie Dettwiler as "ZayNon the Mono-Unsaturated"
Group Name: The Wolves of Zaramund
Dungeon: The Pit of Tenebrous Worms
Theme Song: "Chain Lightning" by Gygax
Additional Music by: Erang - Featured songs: A Majestic Shadow, The Dark Totem
Game Rules: Available for free on Github!
Daily Wisdom: If you can't get your brand new wolf to howl, try slapping it a few times. Or don't - it might be bitey...

Episode Length: 30:57 (we support Chapter Marks!):

Support HAMMERCRAWL! by donating to their Tip Jar: https://tips.pinecast.com/jar/hammercrawl

Find out more at https://hammercrawl.pinecast.co

Send us your feedback online: https://pinecast.com/feedback/hammercrawl/d086c0af-3c1a-4348-b391-5a1894dd041d

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Ep014: WoZ Part 11 - Chapter 1 Conclusion

Fri, 09 Nov 2018 01:22:29 -0000

With this episode we conclude the first adventure of the Wolves of Zaramund! We open with more in-character discussion of future plans, and further preparation for the next dungeon. Stick around for a great post-mortem discussion on the events thus far, and the players' experiences with the HAMMERCRAWL! method of role-playing. Thanks for listening, everyone!

Drop us a line! You can follow us on Twitter and Instagram as "Breakfastpuppy" or email NPC directly as NPC at Breakfastpuppies dot com. We have a Discord Channel, Facebook Page, and Google Plus Community, too! And let us know your thoughts by leaving a review on iTunes!

Links of Note:

Credits:

HAMMERSMITH: NPC
Players: Lady Coquine as "Delphine the Delver," Rachel Kelly as "Edith Cumbersnatch," April as "Seraphina Labia," Natalie as "Dominion Chester Killfrogger," and Poppy Beaujolais as "Draug the Vengeful"
Group Name: The Wolves of Zaramund
Dungeon: The Black Lair of the Vampire Count
Theme Song: "Chain Lightning" by Gygax
Additional Music by: Erang - Featured songs: Another World, Another Time, Lobrok Dan Labrak, and Guided By An Ancient Glory
Game Rules: Available for free on Github!
Daily Wisdom: If a strange group of adventurers at a coffee shop offers you a matching tattoo, you say yes!

Episode Length: 47:58 (we support Chapter Marks!):

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Ep013: WoZ Part 10 - Back to Town!

Fri, 09 Nov 2018 01:19:59 -0000

In the tenth episode of this saga, we deal with some post-dungeon, in-town miscellany. There's a lot of rules stuff here, but it's mixed in with a great amount of sweet character development, too. So hang around and get a deeper feel for how some of the background stuff works, and listen to the ongoing comedy! Oh, and meet the newest recruit to the Wolves, too!

Credits:

HAMMERSMITH: NPC
Players: Lady Coquine as "Delphine the Delver," Rachel Kelly as "Edith Cumbersnatch," April as "Seraphina Labia," Natalie as "Dominion Chester Killfrogger," and Poppy Beaujolais as "Draug the Vengeful"
Group Name: The Wolves of Zaramund
Dungeon: The Black Lair of the Vampire Count
Theme Song: "Chain Lightning" by Gygax
Additional Music by: Erang - Featured song Feast of the Moon
Game Rules: Available for free on Github!
Daily Wisdom: In Hammercrawl, a Cleric without a Cure spell, is just a weak fighter trying desperately not to die.

Episode Length: 30:40 (we support Chapter Marks!):

Support HAMMERCRAWL! by donating to their Tip Jar: https://tips.pinecast.com/jar/hammercrawl

Find out more at https://hammercrawl.pinecast.co

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Ep012: WoZ Part 9 - That Which Does Not Kill You Makes You Evil

Fri, 09 Nov 2018 01:18:13 -0000

In the ninth episode of their ongoing saga, the Wolves of Zaramund face dangerous creepy-crawlies deep within THE BLACK LAIR OF THE VAMPIRE COUNT!

Credits:

HAMMERSMITH: NPC
Players: Lady Coquine as "Delphine the Delver," Rachel Kelly as "Mauwin Meunster," April as "Seraphina Labia," Natalie as "Dominion Chester Killfrogger," and Poppy Beaujolais as "Draug the Vengeful"
Group Name: The Wolves of Zaramund
Dungeon: The Black Lair of the Vampire Count
Theme Song: "Chain Lightning" by Gygax
Additional Music by: Erang - Featured song Metal Machine Dragon
Game Rules: Available for free on Github!
Daily Wisdom: Always remember that Melves are a Giant Spider's favorite food.

Episode Length: 31:33 (we support Chapter Marks!):

Support HAMMERCRAWL! by donating to their Tip Jar: https://tips.pinecast.com/jar/hammercrawl

Find out more at https://hammercrawl.pinecast.co

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Ep011: WoZ Part 8 - Pot Pies and Bad Biscuits

Thu, 08 Nov 2018 22:10:54 -0000

The story of the Wolves of Zaramund continues! In this episode, we welcome the newest team member, who may or may not be a real doctor. Blessings of Fairuza all around for those who dare venture deeper into THE BLACK LAIR OF THE VAMPIRE COUNT!

Credits:

HAMMERSMITH: NPC
Players: Lady Coquine as "Delphine the Delver," Rachel Kelly as "Mauwin Meunster," April as "Seraphina Labia," and Poppy Beaujolais as "Draug the Vengeful"
Group Name: The Wolves of Zaramund
Dungeon: The Black Lair of the Vampire Count
Theme Song: "Chain Lightning" by Gygax
Additional Music by: Erang - Featured song The Dark Totem
Game Rules: Available for free on Github!
Daily Wisdom: Never roll a natural 1 on your healing check.

Episode Length: 29:00 (we support Chapter Marks!):

Support HAMMERCRAWL! by donating to their Tip Jar: https://tips.pinecast.com/jar/hammercrawl

Find out more at https://hammercrawl.pinecast.co

Send us your feedback online: https://pinecast.com/feedback/hammercrawl/008160f9-6e3f-4617-956c-be70275af79b

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Ep010: WoZ Part 7 - Stupid Ideas

Thu, 08 Nov 2018 22:09:25 -0000

In our latest episode of the ongoing delve into THE BLACK LAIR OF THE VAMPIRE COUNT, the Wolves of Zaramund learn a hard lesson about disrespecting undead hippy drum circles!

Credits:

HAMMERSMITH: NPC
Players: Lady Coquine as "Delphine the Delver," Rachel Kelly as "Mauwin Meunster," April as "Seraphina Labia," and Poppy Beaujolais as "Trippy McCork"
Group Name: The Wolves of Zaramund
Dungeon: The Black Lair of the Vampire Count
Theme Song: "Chain Lightning" by Gygax
Additional Music by: Erang - Featured song The Ancient Spell
Game Rules: Available for free on Github!
Daily Wisdom: Sometimes the stupid ideas, are the best ideas.

Episode Length: 47:53 (we support Chapter Marks!):

Support HAMMERCRAWL! by donating to their Tip Jar: https://tips.pinecast.com/jar/hammercrawl

Find out more at https://hammercrawl.pinecast.co

Send us your feedback online: https://pinecast.com/feedback/hammercrawl/afed7137-3d90-485c-9567-8de6452229a1

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Ep009: WoZ Part 6 - This Field of Viscera

Thu, 08 Nov 2018 22:06:33 -0000

High fives all around, it's the Wolves of Zaramund! In our sixth episode of their first adventure, they continue further into the dungeon, encountering wandering monsters, hippy drum circles, and more!

Credits:

HAMMERSMITH: NPC
Players: Lady Coquine as "Delphine the Delver," Rachel Kelly as "Mauwin Meunster," April as "Seraphina Labia," and Poppy Beaujolais as "Trippy McCork"
Group Name: The Wolves of Zaramund
Dungeon: The Black Lair of the Vampire Count
Theme Song: "Chain Lightning" by Gygax
Additional Music by: Erang - Featured song A Warm Coffin Made of Snow
Game Rules: Available for free on Github!
Daily Wisdom: Resist Cold is not so much a spell as it is... a Coat

Episode Length: 32:52 (we support Chapter Marks!):

Support HAMMERCRAWL! by donating to their Tip Jar: https://tips.pinecast.com/jar/hammercrawl

Find out more at https://hammercrawl.pinecast.co

Send us your feedback online: https://pinecast.com/feedback/hammercrawl/0699e21c-60c0-4550-88de-3dc896645bc1

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Ep008: WoZ Part 5 - The Iron Labia

Thu, 08 Nov 2018 21:58:50 -0000

The Wolves of Zaramund are back, continuing their delve into THE BLACK LAIR OF THE VAMPIRE COUNT! In this fifth episode of their ongoing saga, the Wolves take a bit too much delight in "utilizing" the innards of their first dungeon victims...

Credits:

HAMMERSMITH: NPC
Players: Lady Coquine as "Delphine the Delver," Rachel Kelly as "Mauwin Meunster," April as "Seraphina Labia," and Poppy Beaujolais as "Trippy McCork"
Group Name: The Wolves of Zaramund
Dungeon: The Black Lair of the Vampire Count
Theme Song: "Chain Lightning" by Gygax
Additional Music by: Erang - Featured song Das Dungeon Klavier
Game Rules: Available for free on Github!
Daily Wisdom: If you don't defile at least your level in corpses per dungeon, you're doing it wrong.

Episode Length: 26:18 (we support Chapter Marks!)

Support HAMMERCRAWL! by donating to their Tip Jar: https://tips.pinecast.com/jar/hammercrawl

Find out more at https://hammercrawl.pinecast.co

Send us your feedback online: https://pinecast.com/feedback/hammercrawl/4562fbed-18cb-4e3d-a428-3e39a181338a

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Ep007: WoZ Part 4 - For Trippyyyyy!

Sun, 02 Sep 2018 23:19:28 -0000

In the the fourth and final episode of the initial recording session, The Wolves of Zaramund conclude their first combat encounter. Stick around for the next sessions to come, as the Wolves of Zaramund venture deeper into THE BLACK LAIR OF THE VAMPIRE COUNT (lightning crash)!

Credits:

HAMMERSMITH: NPC
Players: Lady Coquine as "Delphine the Delver," Rachel Kelly as "Mauwin Meunster," April as "Seraphina Labia," Natalie as "Dominion Chester Killfrogger," and Poppy Beaujolais as "Trippy McCork"
Group Name: The Wolves of Zaramund
Dungeon: The Black Lair of the Vampire Count
Theme Song: "Chain Lightning" by Gygax
Additional Music by: Erang - Featured song The Man with No Face
Game Rules: Available for free on Github!
Daily Wisdom: Never forget that 1997 is NOT a post-Stephanie Meyer world.

Episode Length: 22:06 (we support Chapter Marks!):

Support HAMMERCRAWL! by donating to their Tip Jar: https://tips.pinecast.com/jar/hammercrawl

Send us your feedback online: https://pinecast.com/feedback/hammercrawl/9bd04847-d516-41af-993c-486e0521c090

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Ep006: WoZ Part 3 - The Power of Fairuza Balk Compels You

Sun, 02 Sep 2018 23:19:25 -0000

The Wolves of Zaramund continue their first combat encounter in episode 3 - part three of the initial four-episode recording launch.

Credits:

HAMMERSMITH: NPC
Players: Lady Coquine as "Delphine the Delver," Rachel Kelly as "Mauwin Meunster," April as "Seraphina Labia," Natalie as "Dominion Chester Killfrogger," and Poppy Beaujolais as "Trippy McCork"
Group Name: The Wolves of Zaramund
Dungeon: The Black Lair of the Vampire Count
Theme Song: "Chain Lightning" by Gygax
Additional Music by: Erang - Featured song The Dark Totem
Game Rules: Available for free on Github!
Daily Wisdom: Never underestimate the usefulness and power of a well-placed rock in a sock.

Episode Length: 35:56 (we support Chapter Marks!):

Support HAMMERCRAWL! by donating to their Tip Jar: https://tips.pinecast.com/jar/hammercrawl

Find out more at https://hammercrawl.pinecast.co

Send us your feedback online: https://pinecast.com/feedback/hammercrawl/0a8d0a96-2583-4c01-a656-1e098288b45e

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Ep005: WoZ Part 2 - My Ogre Senses are Tingling

Sun, 02 Sep 2018 23:19:22 -0000

The first adventure of the Wolves of Zaramund continues in episode 2! This time, we finally step into the dungeon to see what's inside the very first room... This is the second part of the initial four-episode recording launch.

Credits:

HAMMERSMITH: NPC
Players: Lady Coquine as "Delphine the Delver," Rachel Kelly as "Mauwin Meunster," April as "Seraphina Labia," Natalie as "Dominion Chester Killfrogger," and Poppy Beaujolais as "Trippy McCork"
Group Name: The Wolves of Zaramund
Dungeon: The Black Lair of the Vampire Count
Theme Song: "Chain Lightning" by Gygax
Additional Music by: Erang - Featured song The Great Castle Gate
Game Rules: Available for free on Github!
Daily Wisdom: Don't worry, it'll fit eventually. Just keep trying!

Episode Length: 37:02 (we support Chapter Marks!):

Support HAMMERCRAWL! by donating to their Tip Jar: https://tips.pinecast.com/jar/hammercrawl

Find out more at https://hammercrawl.pinecast.co

Send us your feedback online: https://pinecast.com/feedback/hammercrawl/dda22aa3-94a3-4f57-b1fa-3e2eb4615a06

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Ep004: WoZ Part 1 - Vampire Dingus Leavings

Sun, 02 Sep 2018 23:19:20 -0000

Welcome to a brand new randomly-generated comedic gaming adventure! This episode kicks off a new series of session recordings with an all-new adventuring party comprised of some of my favorite local gamers. Calling themselves the Wolves of Zaramund, this all-women group (at least initially) joins the HAMMERCRAWL! annals with their very special and very awesome take on a classic tale of spurned-love revenge - albeit set in a Vampire Dungeon in 1997! This initial batch of four episodes was recorded in a single session, and broken down for ease of listening. We have more episodes with the Wolves to follow, as well!

Links of Note:

Whoopee! Variety Show

Credits:

HAMMERSMITH: NPC
Players: Lady Coquine as "Delphine the Delver," Rachel Kelly as "Mauwin Meunster," April as "Seraphina Labia," Natalie as "Dominion Chester Killfrogger," and Poppy Beaujolais as "Trippy McCork"
Group Name: The Wolves of Zaramund
Dungeon: The Black Lair of the Vampire Count
Theme Song: "Chain Lightning" by Gygax
Additional Music by: Erang - Featured tracks A Majestic Shadow and Our Legend
Game Rules: Available for free on Github!
Daily Wisdom: Watch where you step, so you don't get any vampire dingus leavings on your shoes.

Episode Length: 27:48 (we support Chapter Marks!):

Support HAMMERCRAWL! by donating to their Tip Jar: https://tips.pinecast.com/jar/hammercrawl

Find out more at https://hammercrawl.pinecast.co

Send us your feedback online: https://pinecast.com/feedback/hammercrawl/e7342f32-cc45-4e37-86a3-aaa49c229ec8

This podcast is powered by Pinecast.

Ep003: WAGONCRAWL 2018! Part Three (and final)

Thu, 19 Jul 2018 01:49:01 -0000

Welcome back, Adventurers! What you're about to listen to is a 100% randomly generated-on-the-fly comedic role-playing session, actual play featuring actual convention attendees who signed up for the event on the spot. The game mechanics are a system of my own design, initially derived from the simplicity of the ol' Rules Cyclopedia and modified heavily to allow fast pick-up-and-play from both veteran and newbie gamers alike. It's very much a classic meat grinder experience, and quite intentionally ridiculous.

This episode is the third and final of three dungeon parties from an absolutely amazing live-audience session at the recent Wagoncon 2018 event in The Dalles, OR. Once more, a new party of unseasoned adventurers test their wits and luck against the horrors of THE WAGONCRAWL. Listen to see how far they make it!

Credits:

HAMMERSMITH: NPC
Players: Zack Walton as "Shahasala the Sane-ish," Brandon Pence as "Skippy von McHaggis," Alex Leach as "Professor Pixie," James Bond as "Bob the Magic Man," Dusty Eppers as "Olgar Hammerface"
Group Name: The Swords of Uchan
Dungeon: The Temple of Terrible Annihilation
Theme Song: "Chain Lightning" by Gygax
Additional Music by: Erang
Game Rules: Available for free on Github!
Daily Wisdom: When all else fails you, throw a severed wizard foot at the ooze to get past it.

Timestamps of Note (we support Chapters!):

00:00 Theme Song
00:51 Intro
01:50 Welcome!
02:17 Party Introductions
05:16 They have rope!
06:15 Everybody Loves John
07:59 Enter the Temple
15:32 Why not pole vault?
20:38 Welcome Dusty!
32:05 Attack the Darkness
50:16 Outro
51:45 Lesson of the Day

Support HAMMERCRAWL! by donating to their Tip Jar: https://tips.pinecast.com/jar/hammercrawl

Send us your feedback online: https://pinecast.com/feedback/hammercrawl/4566ce96-7dfd-44cf-85b0-6239b1c65297

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Ep002: WAGONCRAWL 2018! Part Two

Thu, 19 Jul 2018 00:19:38 -0000

This episode is the second of three dungeon parties from an absolutely amazing live-audience session at the recent Wagoncon 2018 event in The Dalles, OR. In this session a brand new party of adventurers rise up from the audience and try their hands (and dice) at surviving a randomly-created dungeon. Will these newcomers meet a better fate than their forebears in episode 1? Listen and find out!

Credits:

HAMMERSMITH: NPC
Players: Terry as "Elliot Ranger," Katrina as "The Incredible Salk," Darrin Starwing as "Donnie McFinkelstein," and Danny as "Flowerpot Windwhistle"
Group Name: The Company of the Thorn and Coin
Dungeon: The Black Hive of Sorrows
Theme Song: "Chain Lightning" by Gygax
Additional Music by: Erang
Game Rules: Available for free on Github!
Daily Wisdom: Always, always, always bring rope, and don't skimp on those ten-foot poles either.

Timestamps of Note (we support Chapters!):

00:00 Theme Song
00:55 Intro
01:57 Welcome!
02:21 Party Introductions
08:39 Enter the Hive
16:34 Enter the Ants
28:38 Outro
30:02 Lesson of the Day

Support HAMMERCRAWL! by donating to their Tip Jar: https://tips.pinecast.com/jar/hammercrawl

Send us your feedback online: https://pinecast.com/feedback/hammercrawl/e0f57b38-b9bf-4a8a-bda0-2da426230e6b

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Ep001: WAGONCRAWL 2018! Part One

Sat, 12 May 2018 22:11:17 -0000

WELCOME ADVENTURERS! This episode's release kicks off a project that I've been working on for several years now, and I'm thrilled to finally be able to launch this feed. Welcome to HAMMERCRAWL!

What you're about to listen to is a 100% randomly generated-on-the-fly comedic role-playing session, actual play featuring actual convention attendees who signed up for the event on the spot. The game mechanics are a system of my own design, derived from the simplicity of the ol' Rules Cyclopedia and modified heavily to allow fast pick-up-and-play from both veteran and newbie gamers alike. It's very much a classic meat grinder experience, and quite intentionally ridiculous.

This episode is the first of three dungeon parties from an absolutely amazing live-audience session at the recent Wagoncon 2018 event in The Dalles, OR. We've been recording dozens of studio sessions for this podcast already, and this was our first attempt at running the mics during a public event. Despite a few mechanical distractions, I'm glad to say things worked out smashingly! This event was so enjoyable that we thought it would make the perfect kick-off for this podcast feed. I'm excited to share it with you, and I hope that you'll stick around for the many more episodes that will follow.

HAMMERSMITH: NPC
Players: Matthew Gray, Sara McNaughton, Aaron Bowman, Poppy Beaujolais, Andrew Lutz, Avery, Daedalus, Will
Theme Song: "Chain Lightning" by Gygax
Additional Music by: Erang
Game Rules: Available for free on Github!
Daily Wisdom: Never let the Cleric take the lead, and never trust a banana hammock with your life.

Timestamps of Note (We support Chapters!):

00:00:00 Intro
00:00:57 About HAMMERCRAWL!
00:03:13 Game Start!
00:31:24 Welcome Lutz
00:41:36 Welcome Avery
00:44:55 Welcome Daedalus
01:01:21 Welcome Will
01:19:03 Outro

Support HAMMERCRAWL! by donating to their Tip Jar: https://tips.pinecast.com/jar/hammercrawl

Send us your feedback online: https://pinecast.com/feedback/hammercrawl/2e69e30a-27f1-42c0-97e0-16258949bcf5