Theater of the Mind Retribution is meant for adults as such content warnings can be found in the podcast. Description. Listener discretion is advised.
For real.
Welcome to Theater of the Mind presents Retribution episode 39. I'm Mike. I'm your dungeon master this evening and this week's question question from the ultimate RPG campfire card deck by James D'Amato is in 10 years, what do you think you will miss the most about your life right now? And what will you be glad to leave behind?
My name is Amanda and I am playing Mel Kelly. Mel Young has not had a lot of life experience, but she's also not had a lot of great role models in in terms of what a good life experience looks like. So her firm belief is that while it's really super awesome that we have this tight knit group of friends right now during the apocalypse, if by some miracle of apparently God and the divine, that's a thing now, we survive it. She knows that tight new group of friends will probably eventually kind of go their separate ways, get up lives, meet people, get over their traumas and well, they might, some of them might still be friends. It won't be the same. So she knows that she's going to miss that because it's the closest thing to an actual supportive family she's ever had. She's not going to miss the terror like she's looking forward to life without terror if in fact that is ever going to be possible.
I'm Jeremy. I'm playing Elliot Brandy Bain. Elliott Brandy Bain. He is going to miss the freedom to go and do whatever we think is the right answer and the purpose of having a clear defined goal of that this is what we're going to go do and we can do it however we think we need to do it. That's what he's gonna miss. He is not gonna miss sleeping on the ground. He is way too old for sleeping in a bedroll on the ground. It was all right in his 20s, into his 30s. It hurts a lot and mornings suck right now. So he's very looking forward to sleeping in a bed again.
I am Brunel. I am playing Ulnach Vaga Johnson. Ulnock's gonna miss all of you smiling assholes. He's gonna miss you guys and he doesn't really like that part about it. But hopefully he's really hoping in the next 10 years he'll still be alive. It's iffy. We don't know, you know what I mean? Since I had some sort of angel creature night me and then we all Passed out. I don't know how crazy shit can get. So hoping to be alive. And I'm gonna miss these idiots. Also probably gonna miss just randomly killing people.
It was so wholesome.
And then it wasn't.
I mean in self def, it's always been in self defense. Except for that one time probably. And hopefully not again. But if I have to, I will. Anyway, that's, you know, more of a joke than real. Well, I hope. Hell, who knows? He's like, I've got a penchant for killing right now. It's a problem. So who knows?
Jeffrey Dahmer, the sequel, right?
So much worse the second time around.
You lose the friends cause we're stopping you from murdering everyone in your party.
Hey, hey, hey. Calm down. He looked at me and I didn't like it. I didn't like how he looked at me.
Put down the hammer.
You want me to put it down? Oh, put it down.
Ulbak. I can take you. We proved this.
Yes, she is squirrely. She's very fast.
He likes the hammer.
Yep.
Hello. I am Downs and I'm playing James O'Brien. James is gonna miss the freedom for sure in 10 years if we're able to fix the problem in the world starts turning again. He's gonna miss the freedom of being able to go wherever without social constraints for sure.
Has that been a problem you faced?
No, but there's currently no digital record of James.
Oh, okay.
What are you not going to miss, James?
I'm kind of getting tired of the campfire cooking. I'll bet that's why grilling was really nice.
I'm Casey, I play Emory Lee and similar to Elliot, Emory has really liked having this direct, clear purpose in life and is not anything she ever would have seen coming obviously. But having a direction to go and something to work through towards is not something that she's necessarily had before. She is not going to miss like this terror moving around so much the like the travels. Camping is fun. She thought it was fun before. That was our entire life. But ultimately she's been kind of enjoying despite everything kind of going to hell a little bit. She's kind of been enjoying having that direction.
Morotar is fully convinced that 10 years from now he'll be wrapping up the previously unachieved invasion of Russia in the winter. He will be the one that achieves and by that point he's pretty convinced that he will be looking for the next planet to top.
I hear Mars is nice this time of year.
Let's roll for recap we'll go old school. Highest.
That is huge. Okay.
Yeah.
Thirteen.
It doesn't roll.
It just.
Boom. Really? Also 13.
Two, four.
Wow. 13s. Roll off betwixt the two of you.
Eight still. Oh, fuck. Still high.
Yeah.
Fuck.
All right, what happened last episode? I do specifically mean the episode directly before this one.
I knew that was.
You do A lot.
So anyway, we left Junction.
That was episode one.
Wow.
That was the last thing he clearly remembers.
See, we were all in a panic because Melanie had disappeared off the face of the Earth. But it turns out she was just in a different plane of existence.
Next to the face of the Earth.
Next to the face of the earth. Yeah. We talked about taking the wizardy book away from old man McGruber that he cooked himself. So that's no longer a problem. More than likely. Let's see. We made it back to town, made fish tacos. Very important.
They were baller. They were good.
Yeah, very good. Especially the second time with the Jesus fish. We were told by the pastor.
Eric.
Is that his name?
That his prayers were answered. Went to the church, met a celestial of some flavor known as David. If I remember correctly. He poked Olnak with a sword and got rid of the lycanthropy. We all went to sleep, the fish came back to life and then summarily suffocated and died. Yep, the fish died. I cooked it again. And then we were told that. What's your sister's name? Sadie. Sadie apparently has disappeared. Ms. Anymore.
You cooked a 22 steak? That too. Yeah.
That was.
So you all decided you were going to eat first and then find Sadie. Priorities.
This is the first time we've had a good steak at.
We can.
We can walk and eat. It's fine.
We can all walk and eat. I got. I'll take it in my hand.
So, yeah, Sharon is very much not sitting down at the table looking around. Sadie's missing. Did she come back?
No, we haven't seen her since she left for lunch.
I'm like, mid tucking my napkin into my shirt.
Mel's like, cutting and chewing as she's listening.
This is terrible.
Ooh, this is good.
Did she make it to the wall?
Yeah, she was there. She ate those fantastic fish talk. See? Yeah, she ate with us and she said she was going to start seeing if she could go about patching up the wall some. Apparently she can plants now is basically all she said before wandering off. I could plant and wandered off, which I thought was a weird.
That is a weird way to say.
What she can Do?
Yeah, that is, she wandered off to patch the wall and we haven't seen her since.
Correct.
What was the last time you saw.
Her and where were you stationed at the mall?
I was stationed up at the or.
Where did she walk away from you?
I guess.
I was stationed at the welcome table, I guess you'd call it, where we have the cookies and the coffees and the stuff. And she just. She went off around the corner. We had workers around the corner there. Some folks say they saw her working, but they were all kind of focused doing their own thing. The wall's getting quite tall, so half of the building project is figuring out ghetto Rick's scaffolding to get up to the next layer.
So not.
Oh, sure, giant beanstalk looking thing or a weed kind of over a wall section?
No.
Okay.
No, Jack wasn't there.
Just check it. She can plants now.
No, but, you know, some of the workers said that she was looking pretty interested at some of the graffiti that's popped on the. You know, the kids with their spray paints and big flat surface were painting on it. She was looking pretty interested at some of that, but everybody was pretty well focused on their own tasks. Nobody saw her leave. Nobody saw her walk away. She's not there now.
Which specific bit of graffiti was she interested in? Like, could you take us there?
Yeah, I could show you. Okay.
And then how long ago was this? A couple hours ago. Five hours. How long?
It's hard to say. I notice. I noticed she's missing. When it was time to come home, everybody was pretty well filtering off, and she didn't filter off with it.
Okay.
Yeah.
Unfortunately, we have a gap in our memory.
Yeah, that's a good point.
Really hard.
Yeah.
All right.
And very sudden.
Well, I. I'm going to go try and find.
No, I'm right.
Oh, yeah.
Okay.
As he finishes his steak off, I absolutely. I'm listening and asking questions and eating.
I haven't said much because I'm just shoving it down like going as much as possible so we can get the out of here.
This is dope, but this is urgent.
This is fantastic steak.
All right, well, let's.
Let's go. Let's go at least where we last saw her and find the graffiti.
Yeah.
So she leads you down to the northwest, I believe is where I've been consistently saying this is part of town. And there's. You can see it started off as a wall between buildings, but up on the westest part of. Started just becoming its corral. Clearly they. As you're walking, Sharon's filling in on some of the details. Their undead population wasn't terrible, but after about two weeks, pretty large hordes started coming from the nearby cities. And through some pretty hard, clever work on their part, they were able to herd the zombies into this monster sized pen. And they've just kept building more sections as they've gone.
Absolutely terrifying.
Yeah. It was one of the worst days that any of them hope they'll ever see again.
No, no, no. The fact that they're all still here, technically, they're just penned up.
Well, I mean, yeah, that's scary too. That day was pretty traumatic. But the pen's scary too. That's why we keep fortifying it.
Do they like die of starvation eventually? Like die die? Like perma die?
They change.
Change how?
You'll see.
Okay, I don't like that Resident Evil setup, but all right.
Yeah, exactly.
I don't. I don't. I have not the words to describe what they go through.
That doesn't help. That makes it sound worse. That's cool.
All right, but. So it's a fairly. You're approaching it. You saw it a little bit from the rooftop of the mason's lodge when you were hanging out with Blake.
That's right, Balaki.
But up close and personal, this thing is. It's a fierce structure. It's ghetto rigged as hell. And you're seeing bits of dresser, pallets, walls, fences, any type of wood, any wood that they could cobble together. It's very fortnite buildy kind of vibe, honestly. Bits of drywall holding it on places. Whatever flat nailable surface they had has been combined into a fairly impressive pen. I believe I said last time it was about two stories tall, which is still the case. And what you can see today's work was mostly creating braces to help keep the pen upright. They were fortifying arms coming off at angles to reinforce the wall, basically strengthen it. So you can see that there is some real sketchy scaffolding spots leading up to the top of these bars where they were faceting to the Grace fortification. And Emery's. Ms. Sharon. Ms. Sharon leads you around. You can see where very obviously the cookie table is with a logbook saying who volunteered how much? Yada, yada, yada. And she leads you around the corner and you see a fair bit of pretty standard kid Graffitique couple Anarchy A's, handful of resists.
The stupid S. Yeah, stupid S that everybody has always. Everybody's written for, apparently since the dawn of time.
Yeah, a couple of kilroys was here's.
Great World War I throwback. Or.
As you're getting further, you can tell the difference between the graffiti. Because Fort Morgan is not a hub of urban art. So they don't have the spray paint control. You see on good stuff, there's a lot of dripping, a lot of bleeding. It's pretty weird. There's a section where the paint is crisp, clean, green color.
Does it look fresh?
Very. And it looks very well done. And it doesn't look like any graffiti you've seen. It looks runic.
Yeah, that's what I was afraid of.
It looks sprunic in a vaguely circle.
Awesome.
Does Mel react to it at all?
I mean, Mel, do you react to it at all? I always react to the things I don't understand.
Well, I meant like, I didn't know it was like a charmed effect that.
No, she's the normal amount of charm.
Okay.
Why is this wall?
It's a wall. It's a slick wall. I don't know. It gives me eebie jeebies. I definitely have the heating chance.
I don't know if like, this is like some kind of like, trigger to make Sadie, like fall deeper into the charm thing that you're under.
What?
Don't worry about it.
He thinks the vampire be casting the graffitis to make you love him.
Something like that. Yeah.
Very strong.
Because all I knew, saw the graffiti, was interested in the graffiti, and then disappeared off the face yet.
I don't know.
What if it's a portal?
All I know is that circle y ruin ruins. Ruins give me the heebie jeebies. That's. That says magic creeped up. What's the meaning?
Circular runs.
We. So earlier today, Mel and I were looking at a spirit spell book and helped at least figure out how to cast the spell that was in it.
Do any of those runes look like what we saw?
Either investigation or history.
It's been the Wheel of Fortune by.
Aval and specifically only these two characters does. The rest of you were fishing.
No. Yeah, I was throwing a hammer and stuff.
18.
Oh, no, it was before we were throwing hammers and stuff.
Yep. You were fishing.
Not one.
Nice dope.
I'm rolling like garbage.
Mel is good short term memory.
Can we find Jeff and have him look at it?
I was gonna say Mel's whole thing was that she hated reading and studying, but when she actually applied herself, she was surprisingly good at it.
Emery, These are green runes in a vaguely circle.
I'm staring at them and I'm like, I don't like this.
This doesn't you rolled an 18?
Yes.
You see it? Kneeled. The first thing you see is you see the symbol from the Crazy dudes trailer that meant alteration. The one that you guys were able to kind of suss out changes or change something. More worryingly, though, you have just a rock star epiphany. This looks very similar to the runes that were engraved. The baseball field before a Moritar.
Oh, no, I don't like this. This looks like. Did anybody remember on the TV when the dude showed up in the field and there was all of that? Like that, but in the field.
Good field.
And as she is mentioning this, you do remember there was the ball of light that turned into a pillar. And right after being a pillar, runes were burned into the turf just before Ammoratar and his army emerged.
Yeah, because my phone had stopped working. So I looked up at the TV and I saw that you can't say.
With extreme certainty that every room's an exact match. You couldn't see them all on tv, but they look super. The vibe is spot on.
How can this be the same thing? No one's freaking out after seeing a gigantic pillar of light. Unless this one's more subtle.
It could be more subtle, but, I mean, I don't know. I'm still getting the bad magic. Hee jeebies. It's green. Maybe green's good. What color were they on the tv?
They were green, which would have been hard.
Is there anybody here at the wall that was working?
Sure.
At the time when Sadie disappeared. We want to ask around, and Jorge comes up. Okay. We want to find out.
Does he sound like Dante?
No. Damn, I can't do that accent.
Same stuff, fool.
Pardon me. Do you know Sadie Lee?
In passing.
I mean, you know who she is. She was helping at the wall this afternoon. Did you see her happen to.
Yeah, I was up in the scaffolding for the most part, but, yeah, Jorge could be from Canada. They called me George up there. Yeah, I was working up at the top of the wall. She was real interested in the same stuff that y'all are interested in there.
Did you. Was she messing with. We're trying to find her. She didn't make it home.
I was more worried about the timber here, but she was definitely, like, staring at it. She made some plants grow near it, and she. Which I thought was wild. I looked at them and they got big. And you see there's one real healthy, like fern or a sunflower. Yeah, it's, like, huge, but yeah, I mean, you know, I saw her kind of messing with it. And then I got back to adjusting and anchoring the timber. I looked back and she was gone. I just kind of assumed that she had wandered off to check out the rest of it.
All right.
There was a very, very faint, like breeze around that same time, I'd say. But you know.
All right. Thank you. Horror.
Sure. That was just a coincidence.
We appreciate it.
Yeah.
You stay safe working up there. Okay.
Yep. Thankfully next week it's the Baptist church down the street Some his turn.
All right.
I know I get a break. That was.
Well, thank you.
Scary.
I got a bad idea.
Mel's got a wall.
Okay. Well.
Okay.
Not bad.
That was not on my list of expected reactions.
Keeping in mind my patches are magical.
They are indeed.
With mage hand. But that works too.
Go ahead and attack the wall. God.
Do I have to roll the hit?
Yeah. Yeah you do.
Oh, God damn it.
All right.
Why do I expect this to go horribly awry very quickly? All right.
Thirteen hit the wall.
Yep. Little roll damage.
Okay. Four points of bloodshed. A magical bludgeoning damage on the wall.
Let's say that this portion is plywood. That way you have a decent sized uniform, flat surface. You absolutely crack that.
Mel. We don't know what that does. We don't know what the spell does.
I don't know. I just.
And Jorge's like, what are you doing?
I. I just thought it might help.
This wall keeps them in. And you hear as soon as you. Because it's not quiet.
Oh, fuck.
I forgot inside.
I had a bad idea, but not that bad.
Sal absolutely forgot about the zombies.
Think before you punch.
I swear.
Yeah. I kicked that door open. And then we all almost fucking died. You don't remember that one?
Sorry. I totally forgot about the zombies.
Emery. What Jorge said. Sounds like she was casting spells at this thing. Maybe you can see if you can.
If she cast spells at this thing and she disappeared.
That was.
We'll all close. We'll get close together and do it. But we don't know where it goes.
Maybe we'll instant transmission to wherever this takes us.
We could put something in front of it. And I can. Mage hand. And touch the circle.
Mage hand and be well.
You should mend it before we go.
Teleport it or something.
Okay. And then we'll.
It'll take me a good couple minutes.
I don't know.
Okay. I say we all stand in front of it really close. Emery hits it with magic and hopefully we get teleported to where?
Wait. Do we have all our. If we're teleported somewhere that we do all of our gear.
I came ready for fights.
So yeah.
We're going to zombie territory. I was ready to throw down.
All right. This is a terrible idea.
But it is.
It's never stopped.
They all are. All of them. Everyone we've had. They've worked out so far.
Maybe you know we're alive just in case. Maybe you like put a hand on me. I don't want to teleport somewhere else.
Okay.
I'll put a hand on every and.
Then just make like a chain link.
Yeah.
We'll just make a chain and I'll.
Reach out to the thing.
It's like a selfie picture.
I start with mending.
Luz could do our way through something here.
Mending.
Okay. You fixed the board.
Okay.
Yay.
That's good.
Doesn't do anything else.
You could kind of vaguely see the. The paint reacts.
Uh huh.
But nothing.
Does it start glowing in that gross.
Oh.
Just kinda eldritch green color.
Hit it with something strong.
You can roll an arcana as well if you would like.
Sure.
I could hit it.
If you're proficient in it.
Emery. If you want me to hit it with strong magic. This way you don't explode.
You can tell that this was absolutely recently used. It was absolutely recent triggered.
Sounds about right.
And you don't. You're not fully confident if it'll fire back up. So to speak.
I don't know. Keep trying.
Keep trying. I can just go up the spell levels.
Did you. Since we're like in close proximity. You don't accidentally bamf the set of existence?
I don't know.
James. I don't know. You guys asked me to do magic at it. So I'm doing magic at it. If you want to do magic at it then you do.
Don't go Mario Superstar. We don't need another fucking light show. I guess. I guess you can't really control that.
But I can't control. All of my spells are non.
I'm really hoping if I'm directly behind her she can't banish me.
But I sure I'll do a first level energy add it. It's not really. I'm just like pushing energy at.
Okay.
I like felt that slight flare. So I'm just pushing at it. Trying to reactivate what's in there.
That is your roll. Your mild. Too sleepy bomb. Okay.
Which everybody goes.
While we're all touching her.
Can I use my inspiration on that?
I don't think on wild magic.
You can.
I think.
So. You should have been on a One.
We should be starting.
You just rolled it up and we.
Had a long rest, right? Doesn't that matter?
No, I. Apparently it came up to three.
Yeah. With the fight.
Yeah. You had a pretty solid amount of time.
I just rolled a three.
Oh.
Oh, God. So.
So about that whole me hiding behind lilac thing, was that.
Oh, no.
This is the more I like stress, so.
Oh, no.
I'm, like, snapping at James and pushing magic into the damn thing.
Everybody that you're touching gets every hit points.
TPK from our own party member. Oh, shit.
Well, that is the risk of running with wild magic.
It's not unheard of.
Do you guys ever do those Jacob's Ladder things where one person touch electrified field and then everyone touches hands and just everyone gets zapped at the same time?
Is that what it's called?
Generator? No, it's a.
There we go. The J bladders thing is a very different thing that I thought of, but I could be fair.
That will electrocute you to death.
For the listeners at home, we are using the game master's book of astonishing random tables by Ben Egloff's alternate wild or variant wild magic.
Table 19.
19.
I will say none of my D20s have rolled over 10 today so far. So. Not that I've done much, but I'm. Oh, no. Oh, no.
Okay, everybody who isn't Emery but is in contact with Emery, please roll a constitution save.
God damn it.
Sorry.
Constitution save.
Yep. 16. Okay.
15 total.
21.
10.
You're deaf and you're deaf. Emery and Belle are deaf all of a sudden.
You hear us go.
I need you to roll a D4, Emery.
Good.
2.
You are deaf for two hours.
Oh, my God.
You just can't hear shit like that.
So I'm, like, focusing and concentrating. I close my eyes and I push the energy into this thing, trying to reactivate it, and everything goes quiet. And I assume everyone's just giving me a moment to focus.
And then you turn around, there's mouth. It's a really long moment.
You can talk still.
Yeah. You're deaf.
But I can't figure out why. I can't hear myself. Yeah, I can't hear myself think.
Emery, did you put magic into the thing? What?
What?
Anne Marie.
Hello. Hi.
Did you. Did you put magic into the circle?
I don't. What? I can't hear you.
Oh.
I can't hear anything.
You guys are, like, super quiet.
Oh, yeah.
You good guys.
But the magic user can't hear. Yeah, that's fucking. That's gonna be great to Figure this out. Do you know sign language? I don't.
This is a fucking nightmare.
Mel, you good? I'm like, waving in front of Mel.
Hi.
Mel's just, like, staring at the wall.
Okay.
I can't tell. Cause that's normal. Baseline.
Elliot will stand in front of Emery and very slowly and clearly enunciate. Can you hear?
You want, like a performance check to see if they can understand?
No. Can I hear?
Then I'll grab Melanie.
What about.
Yeah, turn her and hold her face. And very clearly, mouth, can you hear? And I'll point to my ears.
No, you can't hear. Wait, I can't hear either.
I don't know.
Emery is going to pull her pack off. She's like, mad at this point. She just yanks her pack off and drops at her feet and digs through it till she finds her sketchbook and a pencil and hands it to Elliot.
And then I'll write down, apparently you're deaf, question mark.
Apparently I'm deaf. No one else, Mel. Obviously Mel's deaf.
You're deaf. All right, we're good. And then I'll write. I'm guessing your magic went.
Did I. Did I feel anything pushing magic into the wall or did it just trigger the surge?
Yeah, just the surge. Okay. You saw the same thing. The paint reacted in the exact same fashion.
Yeah.
No more, no less.
I don't think it's going to activate that way.
You're talking too loud.
I'm talking too loud.
Down.
We can doubt it.
Sorry. Sorry. I'm.
Maybe we should grab Jeff.
This is for the magic circle.
I don't know.
I don't know what to do about. Maybe we should get Jeff. Maybe he can at least figure out how to activate this thing.
Mel's gonna keep wondering down the wall to see if that she finds any other weird group.
Oh, God.
Yeah, great.
You can't hear.
Let's walk away from the group.
Mal, that's not gonna work. She's deaf.
I don't know what else to do.
We'll just all run down with her and.
I don't know.
That's the only thing out of place.
If she walked away, I could track her. But if she disappeared through a portal, I got no way to track Sadie. I don't know how to find her.
With everyone following Belle. I think Emery kicks the wall, hurts her foot because she's not good at kicking things the way Mel is. Then Ed picks up her pack and follows.
Can we all stop kicking the walls containing these pieces?
I can't hear you so I'm not.
Even reacting to that.
You weren't gonna listen anyway.
I just walk it following everyone else.
When someone finally catches up to Mel and she over and she just like. They turn her around. She's like, what? I'm hunting for clues. But of course she says it really loudly.
Yeah, I write, we didn't say split up gang.
I wanted to find clues.
I didn't give you the paper. I can't hear you.
And then she realized that she needs to investigate her.
I just realized I could use Miter illusion to make words in the air.
Yeah, there you go.
That would be very handy. Actually.
I have no idea what Mel is saying. What is she talking about? Why is she wandering off?
I use minor illusion to make words just kind of float into the sky using clouds or something like that. To Mel is understanding.
I don't know what that means.
No looking for clues.
Okay.
We are going for blues.
Someone. Someone who can think clearer than I can right now should decide what we're supposed to. What we should do. And Emery looks directly at Elliot that.
We were dealing with earlier.
I always suspect the vampire.
Okay. Yeah.
How often are you able to do that?
You.
You see colors of different types of stuff.
I could do it now. The problem is I don't think I'll see Sadie, though.
I'm assuming that wherever Sadie is, the vampire is.
I guess we can go talk to the vampire. But if he didn't have anything to.
Do with it, then that's us just dealing with a vampire and not dealing with Sadie.
Which I'm not against that. Don't get me wrong.
Yeah. What if Sadie's green? Right? That's one of the things you sense sometimes, right?
Yeah, maybe. I'll try. So I'll go ahead.
My sister. My sister's not an elf.
I'm kind of just like I am close. Captured.
She might be short now, but she's not an elf.
All right, well, let's.
I assumed you were translating all this.
Oh, yeah. I am a teleprompter.
So let's move away from the wall because those undead give. They screw this thing up a little bit. So we need to move away from the wall a little ways. I am in my favorite terrain, so I get six miles.
Okay.
I'm going to do my sense.
Okay. So just to paint picture. Time of night, day it is afternoon. Evening. Yeah. Late afternoon. The sun is still very much up. But it's not going to be for like.
Because it was five. Five thirty by now maybe.
Yeah.
And we're out in the plains. So sunsets later than normal because there's no mountains to stop it.
Yep.
So you fired off and then so obviously fuckload of undead pretty nearby. Nauseatingly large amount of undead and you could detect back at the Masonic Lodge. One undead best. As you could tell, pacing and notably the white yellow is okay.
Interesting.
I'm gonna specifically note the white yellow to myself and then I'll let the group know. I'll say, I think there's an undead pacing in the Masonic Lodge. And the. Than this mess here.
I mean, if we. If we gotta go back and get Jeff anyway, it's. We're gonna be going past there.
Oh.
I mean, we can. I don't know what help we can.
Get from Jeff, but what else can we do about this circle on the wall?
We should check that pacing thing first. I was only gonna use Jeff for like the teleporter patient circle thingy.
That's fair. Well, I was going to say if. If whatever undeads over there had Sadie, would it not be not because I'm still not convinced it's the vampire. He seemed like.
It's so hard to tell what she's saying when she is able to hear now. It's dis.
Yeah, I. I don't. I'm out of ideas. We can go check the Masonic Lodge.
No one's listening to me. Which she says out loud, forgetting that while she can't hear them, they can hear her.
I'm gonna go check out the lodge. Okay, so let them know that we're gonna go.
Ta da.
Just a scrolling cloud.
Just a random thought. Should anybody maybe check inside the undead pen?
No, I can.
We really should.
I can check with the bird or something to know so we're not in danger.
What if she ended up like.
Look, if that's not. If she ended up in there, she's dead.
That's also hot.
Well, we would have heard that.
Well, what if she like treehoused her.
Way out of it?
You know what I mean? Like we should probably be able to see that now that I think about it.
I don't know.
There are no large tree houses trying to be. She's just big.
The guy that was up on top of the scaffolding working on it when she disappeared. I'm guessing it would have caused a stir in the group of ravenous undeads that they would have said, yeah, somebody appeared in there and they ate her. Like, I'm guessing somebody would have said said something.
Yeah, they would have noticed them.
Like, I got to Believe it would. Yeah.
We're going to follow the trail on this side of the man eating fence. Yeah.
All right. I. I say we head to the main lodge and see what's going on.
Just a giant mimic of a fact.
Defense.
God, Nothing but defense.
That was.
I'm so glad I didn't hear that.
So you guys let Sharon and Ken know that you think you have a lead. We hope we have. But ask them to just hang out here and deny out. Assuming. I'm guessing you don't want them to join you for the vampire meet.
No, absolutely. Just go home. She comes home. Go home and be home in case she.
Yeah, you're probably right. Okay, we'll go home.
I. I don't know. Anything else you can help with? Ask the neighbors to look for.
I mean, eye out.
At least we'll get a. We'll get. We'll get with Pastor Eric and see if we could get a search party. Thank you.
Yeah.
Can only think of watch group and that's almost the opposite.
I know you're flustered. You're missing a child. Okay.
Yeah.
But. Yeah, we're gonna go in here and see if she's in here.
Somebody. Will you take. Will you take Jacob with you?
Yes. Yes. Young child. We don't need any more children disappearing.
Did she say yes?
Yes.
That's starting to sound. Yes. Yes.
She's deaf.
Yeah.
We don't know what happened.
Something happened. They can't hear for a little bit. Hopefully not forever. But we don't know. So you know, that's a thing.
Okay. It's gonna be real fun having this, isn't it? Interaction. It's the two mysterious people.
Yep.
You're welcome for that.
Hey, maybe I can't be recharmed if I'm deaf.
You know what? If you don't look at him, that'll help.
But he's pretty.
Yeah, so just go blind.
You can't hear. Remember?
We do have a non stop. Closed captions.
Oh, we just got him floating in front of the. Okay. All right.
Triple C. Cl Closed cloud caption.
So, you guys, the basement of Clodge isn't very far. You make it over there no sweat. You guys, how do you want to end?
Don't break the door down.
I won't.
Mel says way too loud. I might.
Hello.
Okay, well, he knows we're here, so stealth's out of the picture. We can't do that one.
We were led upstairs before. So if the door. Is the door unlocked?
It's locked. You did see where he pulled the key from though. So you could.
Yeah, so just let ourselves in and make our way through.
You see James, like, start getting out the toolkit to like.
I just reach up and grab the key and unlock the door.
Oh, that's no fun.
I didn't even hear you getting the tools out because she's deaf.
She just like, pushed me out of the way like. Okay.
Elliot, was he on though roof when you saw him? Please.
I don't know. He was in this area.
Well, I mean, was it a little floaty undead dot or grounded undead dot?
I. I can't answer that.
Up a bit.
And up a bit.
Okay.
We were like seven blocks away, so the difference from the roof to the third floor was pretty minimal. Yeah, he was not on the ground.
In Harry Potter conversation stations.
Back and forth maybe.
I don't know. Let's go. So we got to. So we opened the front door and.
Seems how she yelled. I'm assuming you're not trying to sneak.
Not at this point. No purpose to it.
So you guys.
Not that sneaking worked against him anyway.
Try to sneak when you're deaf would be a nightmare.
Yeah, you had no idea that you kicked something over.
Screee.
That was super quiet. I didn't hear anything.
Killing it.
I am so good at this. Oh, yeah.
If they can't hear me, I can't. Well, if I can't hear them, they can't hear me.
If you could just tell them to stop sneaking, that would be great. It's not helping.
We're trying to sneak, and we're being even louder than normal.
You guys are not good at this.
Emerie might be stomping a little bit because she is kind of bad at this point. She doesn't know.
Yeah, Emerie's in a bad mood. So you guys, I say without closed.
Captions, as soon as you enter, you hear Blake's voice from above. You're welcome to come in.
We've already done that.
Please come upstairs.
Hold your horses. We're on our way.
Some of us don't hear anything. We're still let him know. Like the sneaky Mission Impossible thing. But running into all of the furniture.
The captions read vampire. Above says, blah, blah, blah, blah.
Yeah, greed is it in vampire.
All right, make our way upstairs.
Upstairs we go.
So you walk upstairs, and unlike last time, you know, for all of his emo poetry house, there was a coolness to him, just a calm confidence. Yeah, you see a stressed man pacing upstairs.
What's wrong, bud?
Ah, you are here. Sadie's not with you.
So you don't know where she is either?
She's in distress.
She's in what dress?
Distress. Oh, de stress. She is in dangerous.
How do you know?
They can't hear right now.
Magic happened. They're deaf.
Ducky, what do you know about my sister right now? And what can you tell us?
I moved the captions to right next to the vampire. So every time he says something, they just kind of appear like.
Relax, it's not a thing. It's not gonna hurt you. It's just how we're gonna have them know what you're saying. Got it.
This is very strange, but I am on board.
I even add the Z's for all words.
He didn't talk like your captions last night.
I finish every sentence with blah, blah, blah.
I do not say blah blah, blah.
I do not say blah blah, blah, blah blah.
Welcome. Hi.
Hi, Nell. It is good to see you again. I was wishing it would be under better circumstances.
On topic, please.
She is in danger. We spend enough time. But I spend enough time with mortals. I am able to develop a bond of sorts.
Yeah, we noticed.
He drops the effect on you. I am not interested. I honest to God thought you were going to kill me yesterday. You smell of hunters.
We might have.
And he smelled of dog, which you don't anymore, which is good. Which is strange.
No, it's good.
I agree. I don't care for the dogs. I charm your friend to hopefully survive last night with all my goals. You reek of hunters. You very clearly have blood on your hands.
So what have you been doing to Sadie?
I've been hanging out with her. She has been friend inside.
Check the words. Sounded like hanging out.
He's freaking out.
But like the text over here said, I've been eating. Eating like that's what I heard.
This short redhead is liar.
Blah, blah, blah.
I've been hanging out, I've been feeding on.
That's what I say. I can read as well.
I am very illiterate. I have no idea what to say. No, just kidding. I. I stop. Cuz.
What was your insight?
Check memory. That was a 17.
Believe him.
Okay, at that point I start actually saying what he's saying.
I have genuine no ill will with your sister. She was just a friend. I moved to town. She worked at the diner that I frequented. We struck up conversations. She was very kind person. Yeah, I do not get kindness very often in my life. It was nice.
Why'd you charm her?
She's a teenage girl. They charm themselves quite frequently.
Fair Fair.
I have no magics upon her other than the bon. She was near the pen.
Yeah, she was.
She is across town immediately and in danger.
Across town where?
Do you know where?
Zookeeper. The which direction? Meat packaging plant.
Auto fish.
Auto auto fish Yeast. The big microfish plant. Hold up, hold up.
Meat plant.
The auto fish meat package.
She travel as if immediate.
Okay, I found like a teleportation circle thingy out of we think green spray paint, right?
Spray spray paint.
It's hard to do this and do the words of the same.
It's creepy heebie jeebie vibes though. I don't like it.
We couldn't get it to go off again. And so she's at the autofish plan.
Yar.
How far is that?
It is a distance.
A mile. Feet? No.
Okay.
It's about a mile and a half.
About a mile and a half from here.
Do you know anything? Can you tell anything else through the bond?
She's in danger. She is scared.
Got it. No. You don't know what it is. What caused it. How.
All I know is she was there. I could kind of. You just kind of know.
I got you.
And she now not too.
We should probably get going.
Let's go.
I would imagine if he just got magically teleported a mile and a half away. You might be a little terrified that. That fits the tracks?
Yeah.
All right.
Do you know how long she's been there?
Yeah.
All right, let's go.
She's been there roughly an hour and a half. Oh Jesus.
Okay, okay.
She's been there for a while.
All right, let's go.
I. I have questions for a time when I can hear you and I'm offended as Mel walks off.
If you wait 30 more minutes, I can join you right now. I will die right there. A very violent death.
Can you move pretty quickly?
Yar. You saw me fly away when the man produced his evil flash going.
Because we're kind of horsebound.
Okay. I can catch you.
Yeah, that's as fast as you want.
Attack.
You know where she is? As long as you mean her no harm. I can't guarantee it. But on my side. I'm not going to hurt you.
I still don't like you.
But I don't like you either. But I'm not going to kill him.
If you have my. If you are. Whatever. I gotta go find my sister.
I am a butt of.
I turn around, I'm like okay, bye.
She can't hear that. She can't see that anymore.
We gotta go. Come on, guys.
Yeah, I was gonna say, like, Mel wandered off. She can't hear any of you, but she just wants to know that she's offended.
And Elliot will look at him and tell him. I'm gonna call a temporary truce. How long at last is up to you.
I have not done anything to you, but I will help with the setting.
All right.
Saving up the city.
Let's go.
Okay.
Really makes leaving a conversation easy.
It does. It really does.
I can't hear shit.
Just turn around and go. All right.
So you make your way towards.
Auto Fish.
Auto Fish. Thank you, Auto Fish. And I'm going to refer to it as the slaughterhouse because I have that written in my notes.
There you go. That's not a great place to have to rescue this person from.
It certainly isn't.
So the slaughterhouse is a large drab series of interconnected buildings. The core building looks to be about three stories tall, give or take. There's no windows. It's just big old generic siding. And it's surrounded by a bays of kind of one story buildings. One of the most distinct features you see is what appears to be a standalone hallway that is separate from everything else and goes over and above the buildings. And I'm sure if this is like every other small town that's ever had any kind of semi interesting facility nearby. Emery took a tour there when she was in school. She's able to tell you that's the conveyance system. Convey me from when. And you do see that the main gate vents around the whole facility. The main gate was broken open long time. There doesn't appear to be any people. There's kind of a weird little guard check with its own stairway tunnel thing that leads over the road that's completely vacated. And about the time you get there, because there's a lot of buildings, you make your way in and you're just kind of looking lost. We'll say the sun has fully set. And Blake. Well, a bat comes flying and lands on the ground in front of you. And then Blake is there.
I mean that was creepy entrance, but he made it.
I wasn't sure if that would be more or less scary than the black smoke that I can.
Yeah, I think we've seen the black smoke.
When Mel originally sees it, she swats at it. Oh, sorry.
He's okay.
All right.
How do.
I dropped like yesterday's hotcakes. Just a little mad.
He just dropped the charmed condition.
It was the.
I don't care.
I'm not interested in you.
Much too old.
Yeah, kinda so if I were a creepy weirdo that wanted to steal my sister and put her somewhere here, probably my guess would be like the slaughter room. But the freezer. I point in the direction.
We'll say that's in the three story building. I have not been in Korea. I do know.
I know schools actually do. Schools do tours there. But I was older when we moved.
To Oregon, so I missed.
I don't think they probably take them to that part.
Fair. Creepy, scary.
So she's in that building?
Yes. I feel her presence in there.
Where in there.
Feels like an upper floor.
All right.
But you see, there's no nothing.
I guess we start from the bottom.
It's a good thing my perception checks were always horrible, because being deaf really won't make the money.
You cannot make perception checks with sound.
Yeah, you're just calling out her name and then, like, listening to you or something.
It takes the rest of you too long to realize this is a.
Well, I have another dump. I can use my cape to bam me and one person into the building roughly the direction that he thinks that feels.
It is a dumb plan because probably walls and furniture.
Yeah, but it's like getting there quicker.
I don't walk up to the door, opens it. We should probably stay together.
Yeah, I'm following Mal. Open the door.
Perfect. You open the door.
I'm right behind them.
You step on it. And we'll say there's like a little, like. Say it leads into, directly into, like, locker room type facility. I would assume that that's they would have a changing room for their grotesque thing.
Oh, no, it's a drift. It's going down.
But shortly thereafter, you could see the main floor. And we're gonna say you see a lot of tracks along roughly where the ceiling would be with very obvious gnarly hooks in them, very clearly intended to move the racks of beef around. From what you can tell, it's just a maze of red curvy occasionally lining up with tables. And they've got everything in there is either ceramic tile or stainless steel. Surgical grates, band saws, things of that nature.
Is there anything that was still left from what they were working on when it went down?
Weeks.
You guys ever see the movie Hacksaw or like any of the sequels?
This is giving me vibes with. I can't think with the sudoku killer.
Yeah, yeah. Shall we play a game?
He rides a unicycle.
Ed, I'm blocking this out for my own mental game.
Yeah, it reeks to high helic here. There's a lot of flies flying. It is miserable. There are definitely still some racks. They were very clearly in mid production when everything went to shit.
Oh, my God. That place would reek so bad.
And most notably, they've got some areas where this goes up the full three stories and there are skylights up top, but it's. Yeah, so it's pretty.
Thank God I can. The light's actually not too bad. It must be a full moon or something.
And as you. As you say that, because I can't hear you, I'm casting light on my necklace and immediately.
I feel like everywhere. Everywhere. Your necklace.
I can't see.
That'll just sort of.
The amount of flies.
I've definitely pulled my shirt over my nose.
Mel digs out one of the handkerchief and hands it to Emery.
She takes it.
Can I get a run of perception checks for me, please? The two deafened ones are at disadvantage 12. Yay.
Double nines.
3.
Passive 10.
So passive. 9.
24. James, you see movement at the far end.
Okay.
A fair bit of it.
A fair bit of movement.
Yar Aylani.
Well, I've been using the minor illusion to tell people stuff. Anyway. In the south. Silence.
Yeah.
I use the words. It's like move it that way. And there's just an arrow. Just.
Little neon. Arrow.
Yeah, arrow. Look at James and then gesture to olnock. I'll back you up. But I should not be in the face.
No, you definitely should not. All right.
I put.
I follow right behind. All knocks on.
No, no. Guys, I think we're about to do combat.
Yay.
Fun. Unless it's Sadie.
Yeah, we can always talk it through.
Remember, does anyone remember what time of day we left for the gravel pit?
It was morning.
Yeah.
Time not.
Well, I mean, we got back by around lunchtime, so. So maybe like nine?
My mage armor's probably down.
Plus we technically long rested.
Yeah. How? Eight hours. Eight hours? You didn't. You wouldn't have engaged it till you started the combat.
Yeah.
So that'd be 10.
The night before, we were expecting a vampire to break into the house.
Oh, you cast it before you went to bed?
Well, no, we were keeping watches. So before going to the gravel pit, we went home and fortified the house. House against the vampire.
Right.
So we spent the night doing watches. So I feel like I would have been on edge and I. We knew we were going to the gravel pit.
So you cast it, right?
I would have cast it pretty early.
I remember saying that you cast mage armor before we started the fight because we were all afraid you were going to blow up when you cast mage armor.
Okay, okay. I will trust you on that.
Something happened.
That was probably close to like 10 or so though.
Probably.
I've got.
Might. I don't know, I. I would say it might be still on cuz it's only maybe seven at night.
What time would you say it is right now?
It's just after dark. Mid May.
Yeah, Mage Arbor's down. Barely. It would have been like 6, 6:30.
You're only down one spell slot though.
I am. I know. It's just the risk of blowing up. That's the annoying part.
Hey. Reset. So you see a fair bit of movement at the other end and you alert the crew.
Yep.
Now what?
Move deeper in.
Just out of curiosity, how long has it been since we deafened ourselves?
Not too long.
Like 30 minutes.
Yeah.
Damn.
Hour and a half to go.
So we need you two between us.
I'll be right behind Olnox inside the other melee.
I'm right behind you.
One of the two range fighters in the back.
That makes sense. Yeah.
I'll take back.
I'll take back as well for the time being. I do have a magic.
I'm almost fighting you from the place.
Right before I unlock.
Just because I'm like squishy, don't make.
Me use elbows, which you can't hear. So you promptly elbow me and I gently elbow back. So it's just the two of us.
We'Re just kind of bickering.
Silence.
You knock it off.
What are you doing?
What?
They can't hear me anyway.
What the.
All right, stop fighting like children.
I can't hear you.
I put that in the quotations.
It's like in front of me, like floating. I have like a floating hub of just X now in front of my face. Okay, this is going to be an interesting conversation.
Like I said, my perception checks are rubbish anyhow. I really couldn't have gotten worse. I have a negative one.
We were already at a disadvantage.
We don't know what we're dealing with.
So you move further in. Are we trying to be stealthy? Are we just marching in?
I mean, I'd love to be stealthy, but the two deaf ones bickering like 5 year olds.
Let's go ahead and roll initiatives.
Yeah, there's no stealth.
No, that's me.
Roll that.
Yeah.
Elliot first, probably.
Well, I should have stuck with the first 12.
Really?
Well, I rolled a two.
Damn.
Okay, well, I'm not ready.
New mouse does not do fine. Jimmy.
Oh, sorry. That's me 19.
It's one better than less. Jimmy Belle.
Seven.
Jesus Christ.
Okay, I'm distracted. I'm bickering with Emory.
Apparently. I'm distracted as well because I rolled a six.
Don't forget. Blah blah blah.
Bullnock rolled a six.
That's with my modifier. Yes. They're elbowing each other and bitching at each other. Distracted by the text in front of me. I don't know what the fuck is going on.
Emery's mad at everything. Magic and everything.
Mad at everything.
Belle is cranky with blank and annoyed with Emerie for once again magicking her against her will.
Sorry.
Twice in one day.
I know. That's twice as a day.
I'm so sorry.
Why do you hate me?
We just happen to be standing close to each other.
What did I ever do to you?
Mel got a 7.
Yes.
Emery 12. Em and Helmut got a. Done. Put it at the top of network almost every time.
And as as down said don't forget.
I don't say blah blah, blah, blah, blah.
Blake.
I'm still trying to figure out where the Transylvanian exit appeared between Poetry Night.
He's not keeping up with your skies anymore.
Yeah, he's flustered. He went back to standard. Kind of like what?
Jason Bell is still offended. I'm not interested in you.
Wow.
Wow. Okay.
Rude, Right?
Like exactly.
There's a good chance you're not in danger. And you did not hear that.
You know what? You know what your poetry was?
There's a good chance that James kind of did some poetic editing. A poetic license with the. With the words.
We're almost there. Sorry.
Whatever. I don't want to talk. I've not.
Got a couple of things in this one.
Yeah. Something like that.
Like.
I don't like you. I like you as a friend.
So you guys start making your way forward.
It's not me. It's.
And they always say that.
Who's in the lead?
Olnok.
Ulnock.
I am in the front.
Ulnock. A skeleton. Rotting flesh pretty much gone off of its mouth.
Awesome. Fighting spinal from Killer Instinct. It's fantastic.
It's got pretty gnarly meat cleaver in. Yep. Nice thing about this place is there's weapons.
Oh yeah. Meat hooks.
If those freaking bandsaws turn on, I'm out of here.
And does an 18 plus 4 hit.
Yes. You didn't even need to ask and you know it.
All right.
Even though we've driven you to annoyance reiterating you.
That is a full six points of slashing damage to thee he's annoyed but not enraged. And you'll be relieved to know that he does not.
That's great because I'm in a bad spot.
With six hit points still.
Yeah. I don't know how many more things are going to be able to attack me before I can finally go into a rage.
Fair. James, A skeleton has started attacking Ulnok right in front of you.
Yep. Well, apparently we're already in melee. I guess I'm a go up. Can I stealth behind? Can I like bonus action hide and then attempt to stab it with my magic sword?
You are not small enough to hide behind.
Okay.
Seems that's specifically a halfling.
Oh.
Okay.
There's probably enough random things laying around.
For you to hide behind.
There's like tables.
Would it be possible to hide somewhere and then still be able to stab it in melee? Or like I'm gonna get sneak attack assuming that I hit because he's in melee with something else.
Anyway, you're not going to find a way to gain advantage on your stab.
Yeah, yeah. That's what I was trying to finagle.
Now if you want a long distance stab with your bow, that's a different conversation.
I'm stab him, but he's way over there.
Anyway, I'm just going to use the sword of wounded.
Okay.
Yeah.
That is a 16 to hit hits.
Sweet.
Nine points of magical piercing damage.
Huh? All right.
And once per turn, when I hit a creature with an attack using a magic weapon, I can wound the target. And at the start of each of the wounded creatures turns, it takes 1d4 necrotic damage.
Interesting. Every time I hit it looks pretty fucked up. You knock an entire arm off.
Disarmed.
But it is still upright.
And we can no longer hear anything because he can't translate while he's.
Yeah. The closed captions have dropped because that.
Does take an action.
You see Skella and then he's fighting Skella.
Huh.
So there's just Skella floating in the air near you.
There's a Skella.
Ah.
Skela.
Did I translate it?
The Hiya. Fucking hell.
You thought we were to.
You don't.
I did not like that.
You see a zombie and another zombie.
I love that.
Technically Emery and another zombie.
Right? As play.
I see what Dylan just saw. All of us do you guys go as players?
We react. But as characters we're like can change.
Bonus action disengage, please.
Yes you can. Bonus action disengage and move away.
Yeah. Just to back behind Ulnok.
All right.
Yeah.
Everybody hide behind Me, I should have fucking raged before we moved forward.
That was. Where exactly are you moving?
How far directly behind Ul.
Directly behind.
I still have my sword out.
Still have your sword out? You have. I'll share the love.
Say you are now fighting for space with Belle and Emery.
Yeah. A zombie pops up behind you coming from the carcass of meat hanging in the air. And it's going to.
They're wearing meat ghillie suits.
And then just a fricking truck. Monster of a zombie emerges, parts a nice couple bit of half cattle like curtains and marches up to you. Specifically up to Ulnok, who is in the lead.
Sweet Ulnock. You got this big guy.
Fucking. And he's. He's a horse.
Yeah.
Not quite as big as the angelic statue from earlier.
Yeah.
But he's a big boy.
He's just going full on hulk smash. First one misses.
Okay.
You could say you found your nemesis.
Yeah. Second one misses. You're able to just. The first one, he just. He swings before he's close enough. Second one, you duck out of the way just before he clocks you.
And he happens to also miss you guys that are also right next to me.
Yeah. Your head is a lot taller than anyone else's.
Yeah. I just got.
You.
Duck. And I felt like the wind pass.
Right in front of you. And so Elliot's in the rear most. Yes, Correct. Okay. So they would make a team. So, Emory, another one comes. This one had been kind of crawling underneath some of the conveyance. We'll say they got some of the rolly conveyor belt things too.
Yeah.
This one was crawling out from underneath it. And it slashes at your leg with its hurting.
I've got hands of hurting.
That's very similar to my sword of wounding.
Yeah.
And that is a 13 plus three 16 to hit.
Yeah. That hits on her sword.
And that'll do 4. 5. Because it was a 5. Bludgeoning damage to your ink.
Okay. Sounds like something special. The 12 Undeads of Retribution.
Yeah.
Elliot, Things are going pear shaped pretty quickly.
Okay.
You can see all of it pretty darn well over.
This being the first turn in combat. I have a couple things I would like to move. I would like to try to get further away and like behind some kind of COVID or up on top of something.
Okay.
I don't know if there's anything available.
To do this cover. Yes. The only thing you could get on is one of the rolly belt thingies right now. And it's just a like series of cylindrical wheels. Okay.
I'll just try to. We'll just hit cover.
Okay. Yeah. You're able to get behind a rack of rotten.
Okay, Sounds good. And then while I'm doing that, I'm gonna use a bonus action to cast Hunter's mark on the really big zombie.
Makes sense.
And then I'm going to make two shots at him.
Two. Not three. But you got three on your first turn.
Is that the one, like, only if he's the first.
Oh, no, you're correct. 3. And on all three of these, I'm going to sharpshooter.
Okay.
All three of them.
It's like hitting the broad side of a barn.
I'm hoping. First shot. 12 to hit.
Hits.
Okay. 23 on the first.
Nice.
And this counts as magic and all that. There we go. That's the right spot for this.
Okay. Second shot. Still sharpshootering. Oh, yeah. That one's way more. 8 plus 15. Another 23. Okay, there's shots still sharpshooting. 8, 9, 10, 11 to hit. To hit.
Just hits. Okay.
That'll be 6 plus 15.
21.
21 sharpshooter. All right.
Hey, you did me a favor.
That was awesome.
Thanks.
It's never looked particularly good.
It looks worse than it did when it started.
Emery Elliot put a hurt on the real big guy.
Yeah.
There is an abundance of other monsters.
I immediately got distracted by something swiping at my legs.
That makes sense.
So I look away from the big guy, and I'm going to try and move. Is there somewhere I can move that? It keeps me in melee range of this thing, but puts my teammates out of melee range of me.
Sure. Yes. We'll say you hop one of the cylinder track things, so you're on the other side of the cylinder track.
Okay, cool. I'm gonna cast. Well, first, I'm going to. No, I'm going to cast a sword burst. Everything within five feet of me needs to make a dex save.
Okay. Which is right.
Just this.
Positive.
It's a 14.
Yeah. That's a seven. Okay.
It's going to take six force damage as a circle of blades. Like, Emer just, like, flings her arm out and, like, this sweep of blade blades follows the motion of her hand and just spins in a circle around here. Just flashes and slices at everything in five feet of her.
That's so thematic that we're in a vacuum factory and there's a bunch of blades just go flying by.
Yeah.
What is your save? D.C. 14. 14. Okay. That was how much damage? Sorry?
Six.
Unbeknownst to you, is There anything else you want to.
Yeah, I'm going to use my bonus action and cast dragon's breath on myself.
Dope.
Or, you know, she feels like burning right now. She's gonna go for fire. Traditional.
So unbeknownst to you, when you hopped over, there was another zombie that you managed to hit. And now it doesn't understand anything. Zombie, which I feel. But it's gonna try to. Sixteen plus three to hit. I assume hits.
Yes.
And it's just. It just bats you upside the head. 4.
It's tough because I didn't even hear it. Stand up from behind me.
No.
You heard nothing.
Seven points of damage.
Okay.
No, she's squishy.
No, I don't.
You know who's here? The heart means he's.
He's an ally.
He's on our side for now.
He.
Yeah, for now.
For any of you. If any of you are watching. His face suddenly goes from pretty soft. Pretty. He's trying to pull the emo look, which the emo look's not exactly a hard mask look. His features all of a sudden become very sharp, very angry, very almost feline.
Okay.
Yeah, I'm feeling it.
You see his fangs extend down. Gnarly long fangs bigger than you would expect, could fit his mouth. His chin almost extends out to accommodate. And you see his hands. His nails go from well manicured to just gnarly Claws, black and dark. If you've seen the new Dracula TV show. Very much that. Just gnarly. You could tell these are more talon as finktail.
Now that's the skin of a killer.
Yeah.
And he, very importantly, does not fart.
Well, we're not in the sunlight, so of course he wouldn't see.
When he said that he would die in the sun, he would die of embarrassment.
And he hauls ass forward. He is wicked fast.
Yeah.
Bypasses all of you guys going straight into the pit that you guys can't see. But you hear some gnarly slashy Terry spider. Yeah. Those of you with Darkvision realize he went off after a not quite as big something. Those of you who are deaf and don't have Darkvision, the vampire blissfully ignorant.
Of all of the distracting.
And he fucking crits on his first attack.
And I have no idea where he went because I no longer have Darkvision can't see him. So it's just the three of us going. What the just happened?
I was going to say now. You know it worked.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
James is like, I remember those. We fought those Before.
Where is the. He's got a. That's a 20. I am going to say the necrotic. Satisfied.
I'm sort of afraid that necrotic damage would have healing.
We're going to find out with that.
Necrotic on the skeleton, aren't we?
Yeah, I was a little worried about that.
However, this second part of that sword's pretty cool too. We'll get to that. When it gets to the skeleton experiment.
And those of you who can see, see, he just freaking starts tearing into this. Now the big boy can take it. It doesn't just immediately fall apart, but he is. He is doing some serious work.
He's being slashed to ribbons.
And understandably, the ogre zombie is going to try to hit him back because this little started. That's weird. And you see those of you who can see, see him grab. He's got a spinal column in his hand with enough connective tissue that it's holding together.
Oh, my God.
With a skull on the end that it just swings around, tries to nail blink.
What kind of skull?
Cow.
That's a big spinal column.
It's a big sign.
That's why I asked. I was trying to get a fight.
You don't bite me.
I bite you.
And he nails Blake right in the face.
Oh, right in the money maker.
Oh, I hit myself.
Why are you hitting yourself?
Okay, I'm winning against me.
You're also losing.
Even has his own theme music.
And then uno. You're a beefy boy. Another skeleton. There's another one you definitely thought was part of cow. Isn't part of a cowing zombie cows now. No, because it's not a part of cows.
Full on mad cow disease out here.
This is a nightmare I had as a child.
It's a 14 hit.
Quite possibly 14.
Yeah, it is a 14 hit.
I think that is your armor.
If it meets it beats it does. Bummer, dude. And this one's just got a broken chunk ope that it's using as a weapon.
Hurry up. Get it over with. What do you do?
Damage?
Yeah. How much an amount, sir?
Six.
Another six. God damn it.
He just got stabbed in the thigh with a bone.
Really needing to rage here pretty quick. Can you guys quit hitting me? God damn it.
We're almost to the bottom of the ramp.
I'm almost there.
You just gotta roll better.
You got stabbed in the femur. With the femur.
No. Ow.
Okay, so, Mel.
Hey, you applied that. I'm sorry? You applied that damage to the skeleton, not me.
Oh.
Sir, since Mel was Right next to Emery, I believe. Closest zombie would be the one that was crawling ground on the floor.
Yes.
That attacked Emory. So Mel's unarmed strike is going to.
Commercial kick, I think makes sense.
Yes. So she's going to.
All right, roll to attack.
And she's going to.
Go for the soccer kick.
One of them misses.
Are you sure? What did you roll? A two plus.
Six for an eight.
Yeah, it hits.
That hits. Oh, okay.
That's their ac. They are not.
Okay, so that's.
Dad, you have advantage on the deck because it's prone.
Oh. So six points of damage on the first one.
Okay.
I can assure you that all of the others hit. I rolled a 14 and a 16.
You should roll them again and see if you crit.
Yeah, See if you advantage.
Oh, I do. I crit on one of them.
Nice.
Okay, so. So on the one that does not crit, that's going to be seven points of damage.
Okay, so total of 13 so far.
Yep. And then the one that. Wow. And on the one that does crit, I roll a five.
Describe it.
A five.
Still got him.
Mel, like, goes into a. A full, like, double spin. Something super fancy. Karate. Manages to land several on it. And on the last one, its head goes rolling off into the turtles.
Nice.
Oh, knock some gun of rage.
Not your turn.
No.
Why not? Where the did you come from, you dirty. It's the rage.
But wait, there's more.
There's more.
She killed one. And there's still another one.
If you act now.
Oh, yeah. It can't. It's impossible. Thirteen plus three to hit. So another zombie comes at you. This one is unarmed, so it just hits you with its arm. For a good old. Yep, terrible form, we'll say.
Yeah, it's a zombie. I can't imagine. It has a amazing core strength.
And this will make you feel better. It is two damage. It rolled poorly. It was terrible.
Can I rage now?
You can rage now.
So I'm going to do that because I'm pissed off. I'm going to double attack the big guy that's in front of me because I'm. I'm. I'm just mad and it's the biggest target in front of me and I. I have to try to kill it.
Makes sense.
I recommend using the hammer. I don't know why I said that.
Oh, I'm using the hammer. Oh, yeah.
Oi, lady.
So why are we gonna beat the tons of.
Okay, I like the way those giant dice clack. Yeah.
That is 14 plus 9 for both of them?
Yeah, those hit. Just give me your total. You're hitting with your hammer, you said?
Yeah.
Okay.
25. No.
Yes.
Did you add your modifier twice? Because it was two attacks.
Oh, I didn't do my modifiers. Okay, So I rolled two D8s. So 11 plus. Where'd it go?
15.
6.
26 plus your modifier twice. 26 plus 10. 36.
Go ahead and describe that.
Do I get a hit at both times?
Yeah, it takes both hits, but it dies. Yes.
So they're gonna do horrific damage because that's what I do. So I can't throw it because it's right in front of me. Right.
What?
I can't throw it.
Yeah, it's melee.
Melee. So I'm gonna hit it in the right side of its face, and its jaw's gonna definitely dislocate because it's a meaty. Just a husk of meat, but it's also very large. And then I'm gonna hit it on the other side of its face, and then its head's gonna fly off in that direction somewhere far, and I'm gonna go, fuck you. And then it's gonna fall over, and.
It'S deteriorated to a point where a good chunk of the spine goes with it. Just rips itself out of the flesh.
Like a long sleepy.
Just bordering on a Mortal Kombat fatality finisher.
Yeah, I did the X move, and then Fatality right after it broke its jaw, and then its head just goes.
Oh, cut another one.
Yay. Awesome.
This one comes up on Blake. He's got his back turned, fighting the shit out of the other big guy.
I can't see him, so I can't even encourage him. I can't be shit.
Do we still have light on your necklace?
Yeah.
How far away is from the light? Do we have dim light over there, or is it just.
It's not concentrated?
Yeah, we'll say it's over there. So you could just see him.
So we can see movement.
Yeah, Like, Shadow and Big Boy also decided that spinal columns with skulls attached to them are the weapon of choice. But he misses.
He's got a skull whip.
Yeah, some might call it a. Oh, yeah.
Of some flavor.
Or a flail. Yeah, a boning flail.
So you stayed put?
Yes.
You moved over.
Yes.
You stayed put.
Yeah.
Well, you went behind cover.
Oh, you're covered. But you didn't move. You haven't moved.
I'm directly behind Ultnok.
Right.
So is there still a skeleton in.
Front of us too?
Yep.
Coming up on Emery.
Yeah.
Is.
Oh, my God.
Another zombie. It is. You guys are whittling it pretty quick. Yay. That's a 10 to hit. I assume misses.
It does.
And then crawling itself out of the. We'll say you guys call cd.
Zombies are coming from everywhere.
This one's pulling itself out of the actual thing. Fence.
Oh, they're in the fence. They're in the gun.
So it's at head level. And it just makes a couple swipes at you.
Okay.
That's kind of sus.
And that is a 13 to hit you.
That is my armor class.
And hits just.
It got a negative one on its initiative.
Yeah.
Sorry.
Well, it is in the ceiling. Next.
And that is six head smacking.
Okay.
And with that, we're back to the top.
Hey. Skeleton takes a D4 of necrotic damage and it can't heal.
Go ahead and roll that one.
The fun part that I forgot about is that hit points lost to this weapon's damage can be regened only through a short or long rest.
Okay.
So it cannot regenerate using basic regeneration magic or any other means.
Nice.
This might surprise you. The skeleton does not try to cast a healing spell.
Okay.
Cool. But you do see one rib fall off. Yes. Just plunk.
Slightly confused. You can tell.
It panics because it can't breathe. And then it remembers. It doesn't.
Briefly look just like stationary.
Like.
And it's gonna go for Ulnuk. Hey.
You're raging.
I'm raging. I'm good now.
Now you're only gonna take three damage.
That is a 15 plus 419 to hit.
That's gonna do it for an amount.
Of damage equaling it. Points halved to four.
Still pretty good hit.
Yeah.
I'm okay. I'm not gonna freak out.
It's a gnarly.
You still have more hit points than I do naturally.
Yeah. James.
Hey. James is doing a thing.
There's a plethora of options.
Panic mode. There's a lot of. There's the skeleton in front of. Oh, knock that. Was there a zombie in melee with me as well? I think because one of us swiped at me. I think Zombie five.
I believe it was five.
Yeah. I'm a stab at five.
Okay. That makes sense.
Okay.
Wasn't zombie three the one that I killed?
Yes. Is it back?
It shows up as hurt.
Huh. Sometimes they come back.
I don't that well.
They're zombies. They're good at asking ourselves that for a while. Of why we're fighting zombies.
This one did not come back. Okay.
It's coming every now and again. The program's like, no, it didn't die. Suck it.
That's a 25. Magical stabby damage.
Yeah. Is that a damage?
Sorry to hit. My bad.
Cut.
Ya.
It's like, fuck me. Yes. That hits. No, you do not have sneak attack. It's only a melee with you.
Yeah. Five points of piercing damage.
That makes more sense. It takes it sweet.
It's hurting.
And now it doesn't like.
Oh, can I. Bonus action. Disengage. Sorry.
Sure.
Okay. The opponent is actually just engaged away from that zombie to the left side of Holmok.
Okay. Into melee with the skeleton.
Yeah, that's fine. Skeletons went.
Yeah, the skeleton's already passed.
The zombie is going to sue you all five feet.
Do I get an opportunity attack because it's close to me.
It doesn't leave melee. It enters melee with you, but it does not leave melee.
Got it, Senno.
And it's a 17 plus.
All right, you are.
That was a good question. And it does an amount of damage equaling.
Oh, actually I forgot I hit with that. So I get to do some necrotic damage because of the sword.
Okay.
Three points of necrotic damage.
It takes that as well.
Take that, you bitch.
Hold on. Takes it and it does three damage to you. We're trading blows, Elliot. There are an abundance of options available.
Can I see hurt ogre zombie number one from where I'm at?
Yes.
All right. I'm gonna move my bonus action to move my hunter's mark to them.
Okay.
And then I'm going to fire two sharpshooter shots at them.
Go for it. And don't assume you miss.
I won't. Not even a little bit.
Okay.
Yeah. No, they're both quite good.
Ah.
First one. 26 on the damages.
Oh, damn it.
On the first attack.
Okay.
Six and six and 15. Another 21 damages on the second one.
So that's 47 damage total. Two injured ogre zombies. He does not look good, but he's still holding on.
Okay.
Emery.
Right.
Wall is attacking you via zombie.
Yeah. So my last turn, I did the sword sweep around me and then I cast the dragon's breath. So I'm just gonna basically turn around and try to catch these two that attacked me from behind in the dragon's breath.
We'll see.
So there was. If I remember incorrectly, I think it was zombie 2 and zombie 4.
Perfect. They make deck saves or you make attack rules.
They make decks.
First one fails. 12, I assume fails.
Fails.
Okay.
They are both going to take sorry. 14 fire damage. It's a 15 foot cone.
So I'm that kind of.
You kill zombie two. Describe that.
I mean it just immolates. It burns up and just leaves like a charred host on the ground.
Nice.
Zombie 2 just reappeared.
How is that happening?
It disappeared and then reappeared.
The zombies keep coming back.
I am not crazy though. He came back. I got rid of him and he came back.
Okay. Now he's gone.
Okay. He came back with two health too.
Yeah, they keep coming back like daisies.
Nope. And then zombie4 did take the damage.
It just says bloody.
Okay. Not good enough. All right. Blake is going to try to polish off ogre zombie, the original OG zombie. And he whiffs the first attack.
Damn it, Blake.
The second one does hit. He feels a little embarrassed.
He spent too much time as an emo dude.
Been a long time since he has.
They're not known for their fighting.
Sharpened his fans. He tries to attack the first time he fails. So he does the emo hair flip to get it out of his eyes and bites. Much better hairstyle going on and does some damage.
Cause tonight will be the night that.
I will kill for you over again. Fucking ogre zombie retaliates with gusto.
They're having a band battle down there.
With his again his morning star. O Dead Cow.
I'm sure it's still copyrighted but you could totally put that in the background every time Blake throws a punch.
Very brief snippet.
Fucking 13 damage to Blake.
Just the chorus of the three of you singing that. I think.
Skeleton 2 was attacking some of.
I couldn't remember who Skeleton 2 was attacking.
I don't remember either. I kind of lost track.
Who else got.
I'm going to assume it was my focus most of it on one of.
One of the zombies. One of the. The other zombie 6 was attacking old Knock.
I do remember that he missed.
I know Zombie one attacked. Skeleton two might have gone for failed. I think something failed. So we're gonna say that's what happened. Skeleton 2 is coming from with his own cleaver and whiffs it. That's terrible.
Mel doesn't hear it but she senses the feeling of movement behind her.
Yeah. This time you feel the air. Cause he tries to attack you with his blade flat and just fans you gently. And it's your turn.
And she whiffs around. If you cut my hair, Mel's gonna go Super Saiyan. And she does her Rihanna attacks.
Five seasons later.
Next time on D&D 3020 on what one?
Yeah.
It hits for eight points.
Okay.
Five on the other.
That hits harder for six points of damage to 13.
Thirteen hits for another six points of damage.
So 19 damage total. You him up. He has no ribs left. He's like his pelvis long spinal column to shoulder blades. Very weird.
Animated by magic and not muscles.
Mel is just grabbing and ripping off ribs as she's like, don't worry, Touch my hair.
Yeah. Zombie 1, do you want to move or anything else?
No, I'm good.
Zombie one is going to re attack. Oh no.
Damio.
And miss.
Yay.
Oh, nock. It's your turn.
Oh, it's my turn?
Yep.
Actually your turn.
We've whittled the list down pretty quickly.
Yeah, we have. Because I was like, God, I got like 20 minutes before I get to attack me.
Zombie one, skeleton one, I have to.
Throw a lot of threat.
Zombies six are at mainly with you.
There's so many.
It takes a lot of that even mildly dangerous.
What's the closest one to me? I'm thinking Skeleton one.
Yeah, you've got.
You've got the zombie one's right in front of you. He just tried to hit you.
Okay, then two zombies. Yeah, also sorry, I completely forgot. Every time they take necrotic damage, they can do a con save to try breaking down.
Okay. None of them have survived it so far. Well, I guess Skeleton one, it's the.
Only one that's been hit by it.
Skeleton 1 and zombie 5.
I hit con.
Yeah, it's a con.
15.
Okay, so he Skeleton 1 will not lose any more ribs to you. Yeah, the other guy just got hit his first lap.
Yeah.
And zombie one just took a swipe at me and he's healthy and I don't like that. So we're gonna double attack his ass.
Okay. Give it to me one at a time.
Yeah, we got it.
So 3 plus 9.
12.
2 plus 9.
11.
11 to hit the zombie.
Yeah.
Yeah, but give it to me one at a time.
I really didn't think it was gonna work.
These, you'll be surprised, are not particularly dexy.
That is max damage. Two eights.
Nice.
16 damage on the first plus five.
21.
Eight.
Plus eight.
Yeah.
Plus eight. Okay. Describe how you one shot a fucking zombie.
Watch with my hammer.
Yeah, just bring the hammer down.
Yeah, he's right in front of me, so I'm just gonna. I was too busy. I was in like my baseball swing still because I was kind of admiring when I hit him. So I was just like, oh, yeah. And then I'm turning like Just swing down on his head like I was gonna bop him nice like a. Like a. Like a. Like a whack. A mole bonk. Compress him into the buries his head like in his own chest. And I'm kind of like what the hell.
He collapsed like a fucking accordion.
And as you do it it forces the back of his head to break from the neck. And all the stuff that was in his head sprays out the mouse David's hole.
Could you kill something without making a mess just once?
Think about it. The hammer's probably still going down. So you open him up like a fucking zipper.
Yeah. He is fighting with a hammer that one.
That was unintentional.
Zombie 6 I believe was also yes. Okay.
So he is my next one I guess second attack. That still counts right? Like I told you the two of them.
I thought you already did two.
Well he told me both of them the first one one shots. Yeah they have the same AC.
What a surprise.
Wow. This one has got a 19. You have one zombie coming at you in full place. He's wearing cow armor but he's only got three feet of movement. Turn 14 damage.
Yeah.
Six plus eight.
Right. That's 14.
Yes. That one takes it. Ogre Zombie the sequel is in combat.
With kind of mildly about throw up when I hit him.
And that's fair. And it. Damn.
Damn.
We gotta have to rescue a vampire.
Like hell he's still looking. Okay, but these weren't exactly just regard.
To a vampire carefully.
Maybe when he got like conscious the teeth retract.
Hopefully.
I don't know.
Honestly.
Honestly the kissy bit isn't even a thing anymore.
Do healing spells work on vampires?
I don't know.
I don't know. Do you have to do necrotic damage to heal them?
Clear. Lightning bolt.
Zombie 6 is going to re engage in combat with. Oh congratulations and miss.
Yay.
And I want to say I said zombie 4 was coming for Duke out of the wall and misses good with a two plus. Nowhere near enough. Skeleton one is in combat with full knock James but he's gonna. He's a one track no minded guy and he's gonna focus in still. Yeah he's a one trick bony Nat 20.
Okay, that's a crit.
What do you is gonna be.
This one might hurt a little bit.
Hey, you're still taking.
I know I'm still gonna half it but it still might suck.
Six is two is eight. Have to four again.
That's not terrible. I honestly expected more because it's a quit.
He didn't roll great. James.
Yeah. Skeleton 1 survived stab zombie 5 now that he's in melee with something other than me.
Okay.
Which is the whole reason I moved over to here.
You're just gonna skill us to roll a concave.
He. So he passed.
Oh that's right.
He's gonna be five elected.
I was paying attention.
We'll see. Thank you though.
That is a 19.
Yep.
For 14 points of piercing magical damage.
That is exactly the HP he has left. Tell me what you do to him.
I probably just like shish kebab his head via his chin like underneath. Just like straight through the dome.
Perfect. Yeah. That's.
Yep. And then I just kick off.
Yeah. Oh, nice.
Get the blade back out.
Dead rising. Just his head goes forward.
Elliot, the options before you are dwindling. Ogre Zombie one who you attacked last time is looking right. Right on the verge.
He's the guy I'm gonna continue my attacks upon. Sharpshooter on both of them.
Give him one at a time.
15 to hit for 17.
Describe.
Nice.
That's the one that Blake's fighting, right?
It's one of he's fighting both the OGs.
Okay. As the zombie turns. Turns to.
Or the.
Yeah. The ogre zombie turns to make a bite at Blake. When it lifts his head up is right when the arrow comes right behind and buries into its skull and it just falls over. Then I'm gonna use a bonus action to move the hunter's mark over to. You said he's fighting both of the ogres.
Yes. And the other ogre zombie is unscathed.
Okay. I've moved my hunter's mark over to hit him. Articulate the attack.
By the way, that still only counts as one.
I didn't say it counted. What is your problem? I'm busy.
I'm doing stuff.
So 17 to hit. It's nine plus 24 on that way.
Noice.
He is current that so he's worth. He's my 100 mark.
What the fuck?
Zombie 5 came back.
So did over zombie 1.
Yeah.
No, it says unconscious.
Just mark him as go the fuck away.
That's how we feel.
Stop killing.
That's cheating.
Emery, the wall is still trying to attack.
Yeah. I am going to do dragon's breath again. It needs to make another dex save.
I should have probably this last time. Still the same disadvantage due to the being an inervent. So that is gonna fail. That's a seven minus two.
Okay. It takes 12 fire damage.
Go ahead and describe did a bunch.
Of dragons fire just Go through the vent system of this building.
Maybe. Yeah, maybe if I actually kill it.
Because it's at, like, head level. It's been attacking me at head level and I'm doing dragon's breath that comes from my mouth. It's like straight at it. It barely even, like, touches anything else in the room. It does go just straight into the vent.
Nice.
And just basically turns it into ash.
The whole room smells like roasting zombie.
Which is a mild improvement, honestly.
I think that's definitely not incense and I'm gonna buy them.
Well, no, I wasn't saying.
We market Ode to Burning Zombie and.
I am going to turn around and I'm going to use 2 ki points to use a bonus action to cast a spell.
I hope you gain sorcery points.
Yes, that would make more sense.
Sorcery potential ki points.
I'm like, stop stealing my key points.
Mel feels suddenly weaker.
Trade.
Somehow Mel explodes.
So you're quickening a spell.
Yeah, I'm gonna Chaos bolt Skeleton two. Okay, so let me just roll that really quick. I hit it. What's. Wait, what's the. What's. I got 10.
You only got a 10?
Yeah.
On the skeleton. You missed.
I have a 13.
If it had been a zombie, you would have.
I almost went for a zombie too.
So that's what.
Well, in that case. Case. Just a blast of, like, energy whips past Phil's head and also past the skeleton's head.
Awesome.
Yeah, that's my turn.
Blake continues to be hurt.
Come on, Balaki, do better.
Get the hair out of your ass.
Loading his stats slow covers the night. Yeah, that hits nine plus nine to hit OG2.
Well.
Fighting zombie.
I was gonna shoot.
That should be his thing.
He's gotta sing emo songs while he's fighting.
That's his power.
And he attacks again and hits again and does damage again.
Yay.
Slightly. So he is just fighting. He is fighting barehanded. Just using his claws to just dig in and rip chunks out of this beefy zombie boy. Shredding it slowly, but it is just able to just withstand a surprising amount of punishment. Skeleton two was in melee. I think I said with Mel.
Some heavy damage on Elliot there.
Oh, God.
Yeah, you did.
Minus a lot. 24 points.
I was starting to say, like, Elliot's unscathed then. He ain't hit yet.
Yeah, that should have gone on. What? Oh, OGZ2.
Oh, yeah.
Oz2 misses.
Yeah, I gave him damage. Skeleton 2 tries to attack Mel and misses. Mel, it's your turn.
Mel attacks.
Skeleton 2 makes sense. Give them to me one at a time.
All right. 25 to hit hits.
Describe it.
I was gonna say eight points damage. Hell punches its head clean off.
Sweet.
It also goes rolling out under one of. So with her. I don't know where she is in relation to anything else.
You're near is pretty close to the Olmok James duo.
Okay.
Near ish to Elliot. But he's not engaged with anybody. You could in all reality make it to Blake and the OG G zombies.
Yeah, we'll go do that.
Okay.
Zombie four was.
Zombie four was the one in the vent.
Oh, he was in the vent, Right? Yep. He's dead.
Zombie 6 was attacking Oluk M. I.
Think I killed him.
No.
Yeah.
This is getting to the point where it's kind of a given. You're going to.
Okay, well, I will go down and attack zombie 2.
Ogre. Zombie 2. Okay.
Ogre Oz 2 probably gonna hit one of them was a.
18 hits.
Ooh.
Max damage.
Nine points of magical handicuffs.
Yep. I'm going from behind. I'm just punching at the kidneys.
You click something in. Zombie 2 came back.
And then the other one's a dirty 20 that.
That will hit for five points. So a total of 14 damage to him. Correct?
Yes.
Yes or.
Yeah. Nine and four. Nine and five. Sorry.
Okay. He's still up. He's still doing okay. Okay.
There's a lot of really loud hi ya ing. But Mel doesn't realize just.
She'S full on key screams. Yeah.
Yeah.
Zombie 1 does not attack Ulnok successfully.
Ulnok, which one's closest?
Zombie one and skeleton one are equidistant.
Let's go for the kill on zombie one first.
Mess him up.
17 plus nine hits.
And then some 28 hit. It's only 20 more than it's AC.
11 plus eight. 19.
Can't describe.
I know not to hit them on the top of the head. They're too fragile for that. That almost made me lose my. So I'm gonna try to just like swing at the chest and hope for the best.
Perfect.
Cause it's too close for me to throw it. Otherwise I would throw it and let all that nastiness happen further away from me.
So it's really gross. Cause you are used to the center of mass being firm. Yeah. It's not. This dude's decomposed to an extent that your hammer cuts through his ribcage. Effectively having him.
And my arm goes with it.
Yes. Right through the visceral.
God damn it.
You have another attack. Skeleton one is in melee.
Nine plus 90.
It's just go ahead and describe this. It's got three points of.
Well, that's good cause I hit seven plus eight anyway.
Skeleton. What did I do to a skeleton?
I gotta aim for the head cause I don't know where else to aim. Isn't this that like. No, this one doesn't lose all its.
Ribs, but yeah, it lost a rib.
A rib? Yeah, but like I don't want to miss.
So aim for the ribs. Perfect. And it just like cartoon falls apart.
Skeleton two is reappearing.
Yeah, but he's unconscious. The computer at least acknowledged he's dead.
This is a weird one.
I don't know why they're all resuscitating. Ogre Zombie 2 sees a very fast moving young blonde move in its vicinity and it grabs its skeleton skull spine. Morningstar does two laps overhead and tries to bring it down upon you with a. That 20.
I am going to use Tides of Chaos.
No, I was going to say I haven't hit taken any of it. I know. It's fine. This is fine. Everything's fine.
You haven't taken any damage yet.
I haven't. No.
She was some damage went to her. That was supposed to something else.
Wait, no, I think I. No, the skeleton kept missing. I haven't taken anything.
Yeah, she didn't get hit.
Yeah, that's what I should do.
Tides of Chaos doesn't let me.
Obviously.
Zombie 1's dead.
He's back.
It's fine. He's unconscious.
No, he's. He's a lot. He says hurt.
All right, it's cool, it's fine. We know he's dead.
Okay, got him.
I can't make you reroll that. I feel like I used to be able to with the Tides of Chaos, but it doesn't say it anymore.
So I'm just gonna.
So that's unfortunately 40 skull.
I mean it is a cow skull.
Oh yeah, that's beefy.
This could be bad.
48 can be a lot. 19 cow skull damage to Mel.
Ouch.
I hurt, but you're okay?
Yeah, I'm fine. Thankfully he only gets to do that once a turn. Played correctly. James, Mel just got cow skulled, man.
That's a sentence I never want to hear again. I'm gonna run into Melee like a maniac with a sword.
Okay.
And I'm going to attempt to stab Oz too.
That makes sense.
Definitely not stabbing though.
That'd be weird.
That is a seven or eight to him.
Trust, man. That was a rough one.
Remember, we all have inspiration, guys.
Oh, yeah. Well, I haven't used mine.
I got two for 20 points of magical piercing damage.
That hurts.
Casey Bendlock is what you're looking for.
Yeah.
And then on its turn, it gets to take some necrotic damage.
Bend. Lux shows.
I do have that one.
Yeah, it's the one you're thinking.
That is the one I was thinking of.
Elliot. Oz is still standing. He doesn't look great.
He still got my.
He's rapidly.
That's for the important part. Here we go.
Rapidly getting surrounded.
Two more arrows out of his quiver. Oh, yeah. Those are both easily gonna land. Okay, 22 on the first one to hit or damage. Damage.
Kill them. Nice. Describe it.
This one's just gonna pierce through whatever's left of his hide and hit something. Whatever's keeping him animated. And causes it to burst into a little bloody squeak.
Nice.
All right, then he's gonna take his bonus action to move this hunter's mark to any other enemies left.
I do not believe there are any that are actually alive.
I'm gonna move him to the vampire, just in case.
All right.
I'm not gonna shoot him, but I'm just gonna just leave.
Know where he is.
I could do it.
No one will know.
No one will see.
I can do it.
He's already hurt. I can put him down.
All right. You have solved my a whole lot of zombies puzzle.
There was a lot of zombies.
We are temporarily at least out of initiative.
And Emory wipes blood where she's bleeding from where the zombie was getting her from the vent.
Elliot's gonna walk very dainty. Or like, around the bits of giblets that's on the floor. Oh, that's nasty.
Is that bone on my face?
Mel's trying to get the bits of cow out of her hair.
It's part of my skull. Ouch.
She did not know it was a battle day. She's just ponytailed. She didn't braid like. It's a mess.
Yeah.
All right, so there are dead things all over the place.
All right.
Who's not dead? Sound off.
I'm good.
We didn't hear that.
Oh, right.
Words. Whoosh.
Go, go.
Not dead.
Good.
Not feeling good. But not how you doing?
Blah, blah.
Blake, that is a difficult question to answer. I am dead.
Okay. On a scale from one.
But you're undead.
I thought the unbit implies the not alive. I don't really understand my situation. I'm not a philosopher.
You're not?
Yeah.
You're good.
Yes, I am very good.
Okay.
Name good person. He smiles with his fangs.
Retreat.
I am friend.
Oh, that's terrifying.
Those zombies taste like a poo poo.
The handkerchief that Mel gave Emery, that's got the pepper as well in it. She just kind of gives up on, like using it for the smell and just ties it so that she's not bleeding into her eyes.
Oh, but now you're gonna get peppermint in your bloom. It's.
You know, at least you can see.
Blake has got his hands in front of him kind of.
She's already hurting.
It's not really just covered with zombie.
He's just like Thriller standing.
He's looking for a nape.
I use my mage hand to wipe my sword clean.
I very much want to look for Sadie, but I also would like to.
Take a break if we can.
Yeah, sure.
You can take a short rest in here.
People break.
Not game break.
Oh, a split. Yes.
I was like, yeah, I don't think.
That'S what she want in the story, but.
Gotcha. I get you. Hey there, listener. I'm going to just jump in briefly. I just want to take a quick second and promote our Patreon. If you want to hear ad free unabridged and early release episodes, we have those. If you want more quality content that only Patreon subscribers can gain access to, we have that. In fact, in this latest episode of the side quest, the crew got to experience a challenge that's plagued adventurers for centuries. Community communication about what happened on their watches. In all seriousness, for five bucks, you can gain access to additional content, which, with the new episode, is now over nine hours long. That said, we here understand that everything in the world seems to be getting a bit more expensive. So if you're looking for a less financial way to show your love, please follow like subscribe, comment, download, or whatever your podcast app of choice allows. We appreciate you all. Now let's get back to Fort Morgan. All right, you guys are on the first floor of a meat processing plant surrounded by a lot of rotting meat.
This place is terrible and I would love to move on. So let's see what we can do. Does anyone want me?
I got a med kit. I have band aids.
You know, I would take a band aid or two. But we should also hurry and find Sadie.
So, you know, hello Kitty or paw patrol banded. Did you want healed before or after we get her?
It doesn't matter. We have. If we don't have time, then it doesn't matter.
I'm going to do my monk thing and now I'm down one hit point.
Monk thing.
Almost a body.
Okay.
I mean, this will just take an action.
It's action.
Yes.
Okay.
You can give me hit points three times. My monk club.
Yeah. As an action, I can spend one of the healer kits. Well, one of the uses of the helicat to give you a D6 plus 4 plus additional HP equal to your maximum number of hit dice.
What?
That's. That's my healer feat.
That was a lot. What?
Say it again.
I expend one of the healing uses of the healer's kit. The first aid box we have, and the creature restores 1D6 plus 4 HP, that's 9 if you take plus additional HP equal to the creature's maximum number of hit dice.
Hit dice dice.
So basically, plus another six for the level.
Okay, so 15 healing.
So you get 15 hit points back. That's a great feat.
Solid.
No, it really is a very good feat.
Sweet.
Sorry. I heard equal to the creatures hit points the first time.
That's what I heard too.
I'm like, damn.
What's all the before text? More heals.
I just put a Power Rangers band aid on your forehead and it just.
Absorbs and you just.
I mean, that's basically what happens even with 15.
Yeah.
In this case, I slapped like an Icy Hot and then Ace bandage you.
That helps.
I'll hit you with your wounds.
That helped Elijah, for one.
Casting a cure wounds will give you seven hit points.
Seven back.
Leaner too, apparently.
And I'm not gonna expend anything.
I'll take it.
I'm only down three.
And you are out of rage.
Right. But I will rage before we fight. Another thing. If I see movement again, I'm flying off the handle.
It's Sadie. Just scared the.
I'm sorry. We got attacked by a lot of stuff and I just. I needed to be ready.
Blake wipes his hands clean and he comes back up. He looks fine. You see the last little bit of a cut over his eyebrow. Just stitching some clothes.
Is he back into emo Blake?
I mean, he's.
That would be such a useless.
He can't change his haircut.
Right.
That's basically what you're doing scary vampire face with the emo thing.
Oh, yeah, yeah. Scene kid. He's still very much in like attack.
It must be so nice being a vampire.
It was like the Redfall vampire with.
Have an actual excuse to never.
They look very grotesque and like misshapen.
I mean, being a red hat is a legitimate excuse never to go out in sunlight. No one will Even begrudge you that.
Yeah, well, that was Boston pleasant.
Look, we're all smarmy again.
Get used to it.
Amy, I am me.
I do not understand. At least you can't hear me anyway.
You can't hear, but I can read body language.
Oh, yeah. At the end of every single one of his sentences, I'm putting an emote with, like, some kind of. Like.
He'S punctuating with the hair.
I would love a new translator.
Sorry, bro.
That's the only one we got.
He's the only one who knows how to do that.
Best translator.
Anybody want to look around, see if you can find things?
Sure. I mean, we are looking for a sham.
Mostly, I'm looking for any sign of where Sadie might have gone or been taken.
Let's do a round of investigating.
Investigation is what you said.
Yeah.
3.
You are lost in the dark.
Guys, it is super fun.
You're slightly less lost at the time.
24. I've been rolling hot with these.
Everyone's lost in the light.
So I've got light on my.
All right, James, so it doesn't ruin.
Your night, I find the only person.
Who can see away from memory. Yeah, Blake can see too, but you see better. So you're searching for a stairwell, Assuming primarily. So you're kind of doing a perimeter, because stairs are typically near the wall. Right. And you come up on the opposing wall from where you entered, and you see. You would almost call it graffiti. Made out of green paint. Very clean graffiti in a circular fashion.
With, like, rune kind of things around the outside.
Yes.
Guys, I found something familiar.
And Mel and I are just off.
Looking at something else facing opposite directions.
James, you need the subtitles for our deaf companions here, right?
I found a thing.
Do you turn it into an arrow so they can see where you are?
Oh, yeah.
This is two.
Like.
Like, landing strip arrows. Like, over here.
We both turn to look at the arrow and bump into each other.
Why are you, like, right here? I don't. Why?
What?
How are they so horribly unaware of what sucks? They're not blind. They're deaf.
We are, which is worse, because then.
Again, they're in the dark.
We can't hear.
Did your light turn off?
No, it's still on.
Okay.
We're just expecting to, like, have the sound as backup. That's true, because we're used to to it. So the fact that it's not there is very distorting.
It would take some getting used to.
Next to another person who's equally deaf.
And it's making Us both really irritable, I think.
Yes.
And then suddenly you have, like, a bunch of arrows whizzed around your head saying, like, yo, this way.
Already on edge.
Why are you, like, right here every time?
I'm gonna go ahead and say, would.
You banish me again?
Dang, I don't. I'm just struggling at you again because I can't fucking feel you.
I found another teleportation circle.
I'm gonna go ahead and say also because this place is not an easy layout. And it's dark and there's rotting things. You're looking for zombies.
Yeah.
We've made it to the first hour. Complete deafness.
Oh, God. One more hour of this chaos.
But, yes, you do. You find that rune? Nick? Circle.
Rune circle.
That must have been hard to say. Yeah.
Yeah. Cool.
Is the paint still, like, wet? Because I'm assuming I was, like, running across the. Okay, this is probably. I'm assuming where she came to when she was from the wall.
Makes sense. Let's go.
And most concerning, you see most of his. Oh. Coming out of the wall as if.
The wall on top.
And caught the zombie mid escape.
Oh, I don't love that.
That's funny.
And it's just.
Oh, shut up.
I played patty cake with him.
I think I stab or I think I try to behead it with my short sword.
You absolutely can. Again, it's. It can't fight.
Mel's very cranky.
Hey, I was playing.
Just walks up to it and then glares at James.
The other accent is going to be the subtitles. Just heads up. We.
Okay. So she felt. Sadie felt like she was upstairs somewhere. We need to find the stairs.
Still. There they are.
Hey, they're over here.
Oh, okay.
Okay.
They found them.
Hey, I found them.
Blah, blah, blah.
I feel like he's, like, trying too hard now to be ingratiating.
So Emory's just going to turn afraid of you. But I'm trying versus all right.
He just watched people that he was afraid were hunters massacre a bunch of them.
Yeah, he's trying very hard to be under. Good gracious.
We just Winchester the shit out of them.
Yeah, we did. And none of us were wearing flannel.
He's got a high intelligence. He knows that you out of date. But yeah. You guys are able to make it up to the second floor. Frustratingly, this stairwell does not go directly to the third floor. Of course, the second floor. Now, like I described, the first floor is huge with. You assume if it were lit. There's a portion of the first floor. That's only a story tall.
Okay.
The rest of it is three stories tall. You are in the smaller portion now upstairs. This is very much offices a bit. You've relocated from them. It is better. It's still a big metal box, effectively. So it's not great, but it's better. Way fewer flaws.
Whoever designed this staircase really had a cinematic idea. Idea in mind.
Cinema.
But yeah. So it's a. Effectively. It's a pretty lengthy hall with doors. Small branching hallways off to the sides.
Okay. I'm going to turn to Blake and just say, do we need to waste time looking on this floor or is she upstairs still?
She is still upstairs.
Okay, great.
Arrow pointing up.
Head to the head towards the end of the hall. Start looking for the other staircase.
Perfect. I'm assuming after all the chaos downstairs, you walk in.
Stealth. Went out the window.
All right. As you're walking along do here in one of the rooms, something slam up against a door.
Just keep walking.
Shudder the shit out of the door. You don't.
We don't.
You hear that?
We just keep walking and the three.
Of us jump and the two of us just.
And then a little bit further down, you see. You guys hear another door locked to that with its own slammings.
I do the. I get their attention like slamming noises up ahead.
And it slammed hard enough that you.
Hear splintering of the zombies are getting in.
These are the nice ones with a glass window in the door so you can see through. And what you see is pretty obviously still a zombie. Skinny, emaciated. Its hands have almost like gooped together in decay forming almost. Almost like make this way less scary for a quick second. A squidward tentacle hand.
Oh, God.
And its head is the part that's gonna draw your attention the most. Instead of its mouth being normal, its head has switched split into four segments, as if the whole head is now mouth.
What in the Beetlejuice hell is that?
It hears and reacts.
That must be what your mom meant by they change.
Oh, God.
It's a clicker. Oh, suddenly we're in the last of us.
I don't like that.
I can't hear that. You can't hear what I said.
And whoever is looking through the window sees it drop its shoulder and ram into the door again.
I. I do like, back up a little bit and put probably mel between me. Sorry. You're the melee fighter closest to me, I'm assuming.
It. It doesn't have eyes. It's reacting to sound.
Yeah.
Yeah. Okay. I'm gonna use the Minor illusion to make sound behind.
Turns.
Like footsteps running down that way and.
It reacts in that direction. You see that there's another one in that room also looking.
Yeah.
Do you think they'll eat each other?
Mel's oblivious, comes back at the door. You get the feeling the door will survive. Maybe one more shouldering.
I start make using minor illusion to make sounds pop on top of both of the clickers to try getting them to fight each other and see if that works.
They do not attack each other.
Dang it.
They're aware enough to not.
Yeah.
So we do need to sneak through this hallway.
I'm gonna use minor illusion to do, like, tiptoe animation.
Just do that.
But okay, people, just because it's fun.
Elliot, slow down and go to moving stealthily.
Thumbs up.
I'll let you guys decide.
Wait. Stand by before we do this, because Elliot has not got to use it yet. He is going to cast pass without a trace.
Perfect. Remind the audience how that one works.
A veil of shadows and silence radiates from you, masking you and your companions from detection for the duration, which is an hour with concentration. Each creature that you choose within 30ft, which is the group, has a plus 10 to their stealth check and cannot be tracked except by magical means.
Perfect. That makes you drop your hunter's mark, Correct?
Yes.
Okay, so you no longer have hunter's mark on block.
Correct.
But. All right, so Everybody gets a plus 10.
Plus 10 to your stealth check.
Can I continuously use minor illusion to make sounds pop behind them to try giving us cover? It's just. It's just a somatic material. Yeah, okay.
Yeah, that's fine.
Yeah.
Okay. I'll let that give. I'll let you guys choose. Group or individual? Group.
We're all running close together.
Disadvantages.
Yeah, that's reasonable.
Go ahead and give me adding the. The pass without a trace. Give me your totals.
Filthy 20. Filthy 20 started as a 7.
25.
6 for Elliot.
6. You said 25.
My modifier as well.
Yes.
Yeah.
You roll plus 12. It's plus 12 then, because you're plus 10.
I got a 2.
No, hang on. You rolled an 11.
Yeah.
13.
Plus 10.
23. Yeah.
Yeah, I got a 21. I rolled a 2.
I rolled a 14 and got up to 23.
23. Perfect. That is a average of 23.
Wow.
Good job. You guys are able to get to the other end of the hall without triggering them anymore.
And to be honest with Blake, I'm just throwing, like, the snapping from the. From the poem reading.
For this Being a group, I'm gonna, like, grab Mel by the shoulders and almost, like, walk her. Almost like I'm driving a car. Step, step, whoa. Step, step to help her.
There you go. I like that a lot. Sneaky.
It would be so hard to sneak. I know I said that before, but, like, try to sneeze.
So you guys see there's two, three rooms off this immediate hallway with those monstrosities inside. One of them you do see is still intact enough that it's still got dress shirt, tie on. The collar's been pretty well busted by the gross head, but you are able to pass without a trace past them. And you find a stairwell at the opposite end. Yeah. Head on up to the second, third floor.
Yeah.
And you guys know basic architecture. Enough to know, like, you've got metal door jams everywhere. You're cheap wood doors with the. The glass inserts. Yeah. You get up to the third floor and there are heavy, solid wooden double doors feel wildly out of place.
It's weird.
Blake was kind of leading the group because he's got the sister sense. And he reaches out for the doorknob, and you see, it starts sizzling and burning the second he touches it. He yelps back, pulls his hand away, and he has got some nasty burns on his palm.
What are you allergic to wood?
I do not know what that was. That was not pleasant.
Can I poke the door exactly where he did?
Yeah. Nothing happened.
It's.
It's cold metal.
It's silver.
It is not. It appears maybe brass.
Ah. How does.
What you say?
Yeah. Why?
Oh, no, it's brass.
I've never heard anything about brass.
Sorry. It was just basic reaction of like.
Oh, the famous vampire killer.
Sorry.
It wasn't.
It wasn't meant to be.
Like an ah sounded like. Understand.
It sounded like a Eureka. For sure.
I don't understand.
I don't know what that is.
There is something protect this door.
Oh, maybe it's keeping the undead out.
There's no windows. It's just solid wood.
Yeah, yeah. With brass doorknobs.
Gotcha. Well, I guess you're gonna have to wait out here.
Is it locked?
Check if it's locked.
I will check it for traps first.
You do not see any traps.
Cool. I will check to see if it's locked.
It isn't.
Okay. Shall I push the door open?
Yes.
Okay. I gotta get a consensus.
Gently, calmly, you push the door open, it opens up. Why do I hear boss music into. Again, this makes very little sense.
I can't hear anything.
Really? No.
I can't.
Oh, oh, you're deaf. It's gonna be so bummed if you miss this. It opens up into. As you start opening it, you see runes flash along the door frame, totally invisible before. Inside is a massive gothic style cathedral.
Oh, wow.
We don't like those with the symbols.
Of the lords fuck bannered along the sides.
Is it too late to climb? Close the doors.
Sadie's in here.
You didn't hear that?
Standing at the far end of the cathedral is a massive man. Oh, hell. He has short white hair that's spiked with a crown of spikes, seemingly growing out of the top of his forehead.
Okay.
Mixing in with his hair, shirtless with red, possibly stars, possibly tattoos, racing along his torso, pulsing a dark red light. Black metal armor on his arms, spiked pauldron on his right arm, both arms with spiky, jagged gnarled bracers and gloves and cool armory type pants, shoe things below. And he says, I really hope you bring the child with you and save me the trip. Behind him, you see Sadie, hands tied behind her back, stuck in a kneeling position. No matter. Once you're out of the way, retrieving him will be very simple.
By the way, I'm.
The master will be pleased, especially when I show him the additional young druid that I have brought for purification. You see, coming out of doors, flanking him on each side, a series of red robes and heavily armored individuals.
I've been translating all of this, by the way, for the deaf people.
It's really a wrench in it.
It really is.
Yeah. Yep.
Or else this whole monologue would go to waste for two people.
Yep.
While you were looking at him, your attention was wrapped forward. I would assume at some point you try to close the door.
Yeah, yeah.
It's not there to close. You look for the door and Mel's.
Like, I can't read that fast.
You are firmly in the center of a cathedral, and it almost looks like it's extending away. At the end of the door, you can see Blake standing there, like, what the fuck? He cannot enter to help. You see him clawing at nothing, trying to break his way in as he sees Sadie. And the doors close themselves, blocking him off.
Does this guy have a whip?
We know who.
As you ask that, he reaches behind and he pulls out a short leather wrapped handle with three braided leather lengths coming from the top, ending in just some gnarly barbed slugs.
Cannonine tails. That's what they're called. I don't need your goddamn purification anymore, you piece of shit.
Roll for initiative. Theater of the Mind presents Retribution is Amanda Arstin as Mel Kelly, Jeremy Arson as Elliot Brandy Bain, Michael Burnell as Ulnock Fargher Johnson Michael downs as James O'Brien, Casey Weingarten as Emory Lee and myself, Mike Schock as your Dungeon Master. We release episodes once per fortnight, so our next episode will drop on May 11th. If you want to follow us, our social media and website can be found in our link tree, which can be found in the podcast description. Also in the podcast description you can find a link to Pinecast as well as our referral code to get you 40% off your first four months of a paid membership, as well as our referral link to Epidemic Sound, which gets you a one week trial period to their excellent platform. The music this week was sourced from Epidemic Sounds, who we are not sponsored by under the Creative Commons license. The songs used, in order are Adaption by Out to the World, Devils on the Doorstep 2 by Frederick Ekstrom for those about to Fight by Dream Cave, Close the Door Please by Lennon Hutton and It All Ends now by Hampus Naecaelius. We also used Zombies, Multiple Groan and Sensor Tone Plop various lengths from the sound effects library. The Theater of the Mind theme Ad Break and Outrage were written by Mike Schock. This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are products of our collective imagination or are used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual events, places, or people, living or dead, is entirely coincidental. Yep, speaking of slow episodes, welcome to Theater of the Mind presents Retribution episode 39. I'm Mike. I'm your Dungeon Master. This evening and this week's question from the Ultimate RPG Campfire Card Deck by James Zabato is who outside of your immediate family and companions has had the biggest blah. No, it's not the biggest.
That is not the question. We changed.
Oh yeah, we changed it. Damn it. I have a script.
Well, we were going to have to.
Edit that out anyway. The biggest blue.