Oh, cushy, cushy, cushy. Remember, I'm your ham. Baa baa baa wingy. neata man daba duba duba. Remember, I'm your ham.
Hello and welcome to our we've there yet in exploration and education and anime. I'm your anime idiot, patrick dugan.
I'm an anime expert, dana hollander.
And I'm brenda mccullough. Your anime mesocritus auroratus.
Is that the Latin name for a hamster?
Yes.
Wow, you'll learn something. Audience. I think that's the first time that's happened.
You can stop listening now. It's not educational from here on out.
Yeah. This is the most beneficial thing you'll ever get from this show.
It's all down.
Be warned, it's junk food from this point on.
But hey, sometimes you need some good junk food.
God, do we?
Yeah, sometimes that's your sole diet. And your body has changed so you can no longer ingest vegetables. Guys, it's been a rough time for me.
Yeah. The other day I ate only garbage and I laid down in bed and I was just like, I feel like I'm dying, which has never happened to me before. And I was like, oh, no, is this it? Am I old now?
Yeah.
Was that jack in the box my last meal?
Oh, no.
I would have gone somewhere nicer if I knew.
See, I'm the opposite. I think I've actually mutated and changed my actual DNA because I had a salad the other day and I felt horrendous. Wow, I can't go back out. I need saturated fats to exist.
The only green foods that go in your body are green apple, jolly ranchers.
That's a flashback for me. I haven't had one of those in a long time.
Jolly ranchers have such a distinct flavor.
You suck on it too long. You get a little edge of the piece and it just sliced open your tongue and you're just bleeding out of your mouth.
Just ruin every meal. For the next week.
We'Re watching the jolly rancher anime.
Yeah, we haven't said the show this week. We're watching ham taro and boy, you can tell that this is about as complicated and controversial a show we can deal with right now.
Nothing'S funny anyway.
Just to stay awake.
Anyway.
We need small, delicate, fuzzy little creatures that may or may not eat its own young. If you're not looking after carefully, keep.
An eye on we said we can't have conflict.
Sorry, I know too much about actual animals and how horrible times.
So this show came out in well, the dub at least came out in 2000. This is something I, as a we little five or six year old, watched a lot. So have either of you watched this? Was this a staple? Brendan, I assume not, since you were a little bit older than this very baby show at the time. But where are your histories with this?
You grossly overestimate how very baby I am inside. Here's the thing. The reason I know so much useless shit and so many weird cryptic references is because I just watched everything.
You just consumed so much media.
Everything. So like Nick and Knight to tunami to Nick Jr. To cartoon Network. To the Game Show Network. If it wasn't sports or the news, I probably watched it. I was on the Hamtaro train. I wasn't like, oh, boy, it's Hamtaro hour. But like, yeah, there's nothing else on. I'll watch it.
That's fine. If he's going outside or talking to.
Friends, calling me out on a show.
Or down, I mean, I'm the same way.
I didn't watch it when I was a kid, but I have, like, vague memories of a friend that I had in, like, first grade where she would be like, let's play Hamtaro. And I would just be like, okay, what is that?
Go along with it.
Yeah, but I didn't watch it.
Obviously.
I know about it. It's Hamtaro. Who doesn't know about these boys?
I wonder.
So many boys.
Yeah, I wonder about that, though. Like, how big is it? Because, I mean, we're we're in the nerd. We're in the weebs. So, like, of course we know about Hamtaro. But I am curious, is it at the level of Hello kitty where everyone has seen it at least somewhere? Like, yeah, I've seen that little hamster before.
I'm going to look up Hamtaro plush.
There's got to be so much merch.
He's perfect.
Because it's not a show that integrates with merch in the show. It's just like, here's a hamster. slap that sticker on fucking anything, boom, you got Hamtaro merch.
Yeah, yeah.
I assume this is sort of like one of those shows where it's like most people aren't like, oh, yeah, I had a big Hamtaro phase. But if you show them, like, here's a compilation of theme songs from the early two thousand s and Hamtaro pops up, everyone's going to be like, oh, shit, I totally forgot about this. This was my jam.
I was an Oxnard kid back in my day. It rivals italia in its fandom. Yeah, it was just a good pallet cleanser. Just like, I just need to shut my brain off for a hot minute. And that's all it was.
And that's what we're doing today. We're watching the first three episode, Hamster Time. There are so many of these little friends. There's too many of them.
I was worried because I know it's an ensemble cast. It's a very dynamic cast for this Hamster show, and I was worried we wouldn't get into it. And then episode three is just like, bam, here's everybody, we're moving.
Here they are.
Oh, shit.
We're getting right into it. Okay. This is great.
I am surprised it took three episodes to get all of them introduced. But I mean, with a cast this size for an audience this young yeah. You'd need as much reminders of everyone's name.
Watching this Broadback memories that like deep seated files in my head that I locked away a long time ago. I know for a fact this isn't everybody. I know there's at least like two or three or more, if not even more than that. So, like, even as big as a cast as we get by episode three, like, there's there's room to grow.
They really start coming, and they don't stop coming.
They don't stop coming.
But yeah. So I had a visceral opening of a chamber in my mind once I saw the end credits play, because Hamtaro dancing, I didn't realize was a major part of my childhood, but I learned that today.
I do love that the ending song is kind of just like a pokey wrap of all of the hamsters names.
Yeah, I mean, the intro and end song both just list all the characters because they're like there's like twelve of them. You know them all, right. It's kind of important to me that you know this.
Please know all of my friends.
But, yeah, let's get into it. We start out with episode one, of course, that intro. First thing, I'm five. I'm sitting on the run. I'm eating a snack.
Oh, delicious.
Great. School, crack, rough, I cracked letters, snack.
Pack, eating the cheese. Just that weird garbage that sings. Five year old.
Oh, yeah, definitely. So we see a moving truck pull into a new town, pull up to a house, and we see our little hero, our little angel. He's unloaded into the house, and he's like, holy shit. What the fuck? Where the hell am I? Oh, God, this is all new. This is all this is strange. So he escapes his cage because it's the easiest thing to open in the world. It's just a gate you lift up. So he climbs out and just starts exploring, sniffing around, starts chewing up a curtain because it smells good. And we meet Laura, Hamtaro's owner, a little girl who's walking in and catches them and is like, you old troublemaker, you broke out of your cage again. Guess I should change nothing to make it harder for you to get out.
Anyway, with high like nothing, like a magnet. Just put a little magnet in between the gate and the like anything.
Yeah, a paper clip.
He's a hamster.
Laura'S mom comes in and gives her a break from unpacking. So Hamtar is like, okay, let's break out again and crawls behind the bed. Gets stuck and has to dig out through the wall. And he made his secret little tunnel so he can escape, slide down the gutter and be out in the world and meet friends and stuff.
Great. Fantastic.
Fantastic break.
He's got a little poster of a hamster, 2000 BC. God, I do know a lot of weird dumb shit on.
But yeah. So he slides down the gutter, meet the family dog, brandy, who's just always asleep in the doghouse. Cute, adorable. Perfect. Great.
Very good.
Love the name brandy.
So he escapes, and.
I got lost.
In my notes in the most basic fucking show in the world.
We got to talk. It doesn't get simpler than this.
I've slept maybe ten of the last 48 hours. I am a mess right now. So Laura, being a dumb shit, goes back into the room, and it's like, hey, me and my family are going downtown and doesn't see a hamster in the cage. And the door is like, slightly ajar. And she's like, he's probably sleeping out.
He didn't I love the way she says it, though. She's like, he's sleeping.
A little idiot. Perfect.
I love her.
She's great.
She's great. Yeah.
Like, seeing her again, I'm surprised I didn't mix up her and card captor soccer more because, like, pretty similar designs.
Yeah, there was a very common look for these arrow ships.
Yeah.
But yeah. So Hamtaro is out in the yard, and he sees another Hamster who's carrying around a little sunflower seed, and the other one gets scared and runs away. And Hamtaro is like, oh, wait, no, my kind.
Please, I need friends.
I've been surrounded by no one but humans for so long. I need this. So they run around, chase each other through the bushes, crash into each other, and we meet Oxnard, the most anxiety induced hamster in the world. Which kind of makes sense because, you know, is a hamster.
It's their eroden so small that if they get too anxious, they heart. Their heart could actually explode.
And he is about in the mob psycho scale, he's at about 80 to 90 every time, all the time. Just that close to heart explosion. So he's like, oh, no. While I was running around, I dropped my sunflower seed. I go, man, that was my last one. So Hamtar is like, hey, no, I'm your best friend now. So of course I'm going to help you find your sunflower seed. So they will run around. It's adorable. They find it. It's great. And then they fall into a sinkhole. Perfect drama.
They do find a seed, though, to ease anyone's worry.
Oh, I said it.
Said it quickly.
But yeah, with the seed and tow, they're both falling into an underground cave system. And they're like, oh, this is bad. Fuck, I almost said Mediterranean.
Bachelor.
Officially, this is why we chose Hantara for this week.
See, I'm struggling with this. If you brought, like, bleach or something. Damn.
Oh, just you wait. It's my pick next week. We'll get there real quick. laura's dad's tuxedo mask, right? That's tuxedo mask.
Yeah. Pretty much all of the men identical. So they are in this underground cave system. They see a figure in the distance, and this is their new friend, Boss.
Who I love this guy.
Just the Danny devito hamsters.
I want a weird version of Cats where all the hamsters are played by people, and it's just Danny devito.
Oh.
But but he's like, hey, you found my cave system. I'm a field hamster, so I live down here. It's safe from cats and stuff.
I live in the dirt.
So he takes them to his little house, which is just filled with garbage, and they're like, great, cool, trash man.
He's the Trash Man.
Makes sense.
So he takes them back to what will become their clubhouse, and he's like, oh, beyond. Now just a giant hole in my ceiling that you fell in. I got a problem. I got a crush.
You see, this is completely out of left field. This is why I love this man. I love this Hamster man very much.
The inner workings of his brain are just things are hooked up to things that shouldn't be, and they're like two new strangers that broke my ceiling. They can help me with my crush.
Please be my wing boys.
Yes. There's a reason I checked off him bow on the bingo car when he showed up.
Wow.
Am I wrong?
No. And now I've realized why I like him so much, because I love.
So while Laura and her dad are out and about, they're walking past a playground, and she's being shy because a bunch of girls look at her, and she's like, no, they're not talking about Hamsters. I can't hang out with them.
They have nothing to come with me.
Hey, you want to be our friends? Wear horse girls. Get the fuck out of here.
To be fair, that's also my response to horse girls.
Just because you don't like horses.
Yeah, fair.
You're right.
So talking about the crush back to Boss, like, Hamtaro says, hey, best way to get a girl is to serenade her. Just sing her a song, and she'll be yours. And they're like, okay, let's go sing a song I have not planned on right now. And based on my gruff voice, I probably don't sound too good. So go off and go climb up a tree to see a window with a little hamster cage in it. And we meet another member of the team, sort of a little bit more later on, I guess. But this is Beiju gal pigtails. Just sleepy friend.
I love it when they see her, and she's, like, snuggled up in her sod or whatever it is.
So Boss goes up to sing, but he's too nervous, so he's just sputtering, and Hamtaro is like, fuck, I got to steal his girl, I guess. And goes out and just sings a cute little ditty just little folk song. It's cute. And she falls in love with him, I guess. Oh, no. oops. We'll have a love triangle in episode one of Hamtaro, but yeah, she's behind glass, so we don't hear a word. She just laughs and throws them sunflower seeds, and yeah, that's about it. Then her owner comes out and closes the curtains, and they're like, oh, great.
Peeping Tom.
Rodents.
She does give a wink to Antaro when Boss is looking, so wink.
What a slut.
Wow.
Just kidding. Just kidding.
Cooked by my own new best friend.
She doesn't belong to him, I bet. Well, it's strange, because boss is like, I'm sure she's got feelings for me. And it's like, have you ever spoken to her, sir? She doesn't belong to you.
The only interaction is she laughed and threw you seats. She still didn't say, like, hey, boss, what's up?
Oh, my God. Boss is what's the word? neat nose. There it is, boss, isn't it?
No.
He lives in a trash pit. He's in love with a girl he's never interacted with.
It all lines up.
Can't be a hymbo and an incel.
It's true. This is a more complicated episode.
Hey, this is the early episode. This is early in his arc. He'll grow and learn as a person.
We'll never watch this out if God knows we're not continuing.
Hey, never say never. This is the only show I can palate right now. So basically, the day is over, and they run home. Everyone's like, oh, great. Laura. She stops at a hobby shop while she's out and about, finds a little notebook with a little hamster on it, and she reaches for it at the same time as another girl, and she's like, oh, you also love hamsters. This is all we can talk about in this show. So they become the best of friends. hooray hooray.
To be fair, at that age, if I found anyone with a remote similar interest, like, all right, we're friends now. That's all I needed.
Oh, you also wanted the Dragon Ball folder. Oh, we're best friends. Cool. Great.
Your name's also Brendan. Best friends. That's actually true.
Perfect. But, yeah, that's basically episode r1 complicated.
I will say, because it comes back later in episode three. But laura's mom calls Laura when she's saying good night. She's like. Good night, brandy. And laura's like, mom, my name is Laura. And I was like, yo, laura's mom fucking cold flooded. Just shut up.
Cave just showed up.
Meghan her daughter, and it comes back later. I was like, wait a minute.
Yeah.
Is this a thing?
Hold on a second.
Wait a minute.
Like, I know it's a thing of parents with multiple kids, and they're like, Brandon, you get over here. But only child. You mix it up with the pet's names. What does that say about you? Mom?
You think you'd know, because my mom would mix up me and my brother's names when we were, like, arguing, because my brother would always argue. So I'm like, I get why that happens. But she's mixing it up when she said good night to Laura, which is like something you do to someone you love. And she says good night for Andy. It's like, hey, wait a minute. Hey, wait a minute, mom.
And she's never like, oops, sorry, Laura. I messed that up. She's always like, yeah, sure.
Whatever.
Oh, yeah, whatever. Yeah. So in the beginning of episode two, laura is trying to figure out what to wait, where? To her first day of school when she already has her outfit on, dressed, but she's running late. And then she leaves with her mom. Hopefully her mom knows the way to the school because based on her track record, her memory is not great.
Here we are. This is a denny's mom. Okay, goodbye.
Have fun.
You can learn something.
And then Hamtaro was like, I hope she can make some new friends. It's sad to be lonely and hungry. I hope she doesn't get hungry. I better go to school with her.
I got a feeder.
I'm scared. So he scurries out, and he wants to follow Laura to school, but he doesn't know where to go. He doesn't know which way school is. And then he runs into Boss and Oxnard, who are doing some morning exercises. And boss makes Hamtaro join in. And then we see laura's mom meet her teacher. And her teacher is hot, like we said. All the men pretty much look the same, but he's got, like, a youthful energy. His hair is, like, all messy.
Yeah, they have messy hair and no glasses. But otherwise it's just her dad.
Yeah. And then we see Hamsters. They're, like, running through the park, and they stop in a bush. And Oxnard is exhausted. And then Boss is like, oh, we got more than half of the park to go.
I will say real quick, Boss and Oxnard were walking around earlier, and Boss is using, like, military terminology, and I'm scared what the implication is why feral Hamster knows military terms.
Hamster army. Hamster army. And then Boss is like, Where are the others? The others was supposed to be here. My note is, god, there are a lot of them. All of them.
They had to introduce them in chunks. Okay, here are the first two. Okay, got that. All right, here's a couple more. We'll give you reminders throughout, but we really need you to fully palate.
So we have Howdy god, the accent.
Sorry, just the howdy's delightful.
Dexter, pashmina and penelope. And when pashmina gets there, Howdy and dexter are just like she's arrived. And dexter pretty much tells her to smile because she would look prettier, which is pretty terrible.
Yeah.
This is probably the worst part of this show. It's just this interruption.
Weird.
I'm like, hey, give me a smile, sweet cheeks. And dexter being like you uncivilized swine. dexter is that yeah, I got those backwards. dexter says that and then Howdy is just like, here's some food. Let me buy you love, dexter.
And Howdy, we come to find out are the worst.
Great.
Ruin everything.
And then we see Laura in class, and she introduces herself, and kana collapse for her. But nobody else collapsed.
I got a little annoyed here because khana collapse because it's her friend. I think that makes sense. Then she gets embarrassed and stops. And then this other kid starts clapping. And then everyone else claps. Who the fuck is this kid?
That's because kana is a fucking loser. All she talks about is her hamster.
Oh, cool. jeremy's clapping.
Sweet.
Oh, well, I got to get in on this.
Hughes, you. His name is Travis, which is a very appropriate early 2000s cool boy name.
I'm just remembering Tokyo, mew, zoe, Mark and lettuce.
Lettuce. So she sits down next to kana. So yay. She gets to sit next to her friend, her one friend. And then Boss wants them to exercise more, but none of them want to. They're, like, all talking, and he's just like, you lazy bones. And then some clouds roll in, and it starts raining. Oh, no. But they find shelter. So they're safe until a cat shows up. No. And they all scatter. And then penelope trips. And then Hamtaro bolts into action. He distracts the Cat and throws it off penelope's trail. But now he's in danger. But then the Cat launches past him into a stream in the park.
It's all wet water.
The cat's natural enemy, despite it raining as well.
But thank goodness they're safe. And everyone commends Hamtaro for his bravery. And then Boss is like, let's go back to my garbage heap.
I said that a lot.
And we see. Laura is, like, getting a crush on this Travis kid. And then they go to boss's house, and there's another hamster there, but none of them know him. He's just sleeping in a sock, and.
No one questions it. I love it so much when he wakes up. Our gang is bigger.
I guess he's the Charlie Day to the boss's day. devito.
Perfect. And how do you dexter, like, make fun of boss's house for it being so messy? But then pashmina is a nice little girl, and she starts picking stuff up. She's like, I'll not help him clean. Maybe he's depressed.
I'm not shitty.
Like, that sort of howdy yeah, that's why I don't like either of you. And then once they hear that, they're like, okay, yeah, let's clean up for him. And everyone lends a hand, and they're like, oh, my God. This is going to be, like, hamster party central. Let's make a clubhouse. You're going to be famous, Boss. And I'm just like, this is his house, though.
Yeah, it's kind of weird. Like, you can be like, hey, do you want some help cleaning up? But you can't be like, all right, redesign it for you without your input.
We all live here now.
This is going to be the hottest nightclub in the city. Yeah, but I sleep here. I need to sleep.
But they get to it. They're cleaning and stuff. And then we see the kids at the school playing soccer, and the ball comes to conna, and she freaks out. And then laura's like, Pass it to me. And kana, I would say she kicks it, but she kind of just, like, trips over it.
We've all been there.
And then Laura runs up to it, kicks it to Travis, and he makes a sick goal.
Yeah, travis.
Travis. And then he compliments Laura and he's like, hey, we should play again sometimes I'll show you some tricks. So cool. Laura is making friends, and the clubhouse is done. It looks great. yay. And then Laura sees kana's notebook and she's like, oh, you bought the same notebook as me.
I'm like, yeah, this was established. Yeah, you bonded over it.
Laura, are you okay? Is everything all right? Then?
Hey, remember yesterday? Yes, I do. Why don't you?
I also love that the hamsters on the COVID they're both just like orange faced hamsters, but they both say that they look like they're hamsters, which are Hamtaro and oxnard. And the hamster on the COVID of the Notebook looks like neither of them.
Yeah.
Anyway, at the end of the first episode, Hamtaro is like, that doesn't fucking look like me.
Okay?
Humans all look the same to me. It's fine, I guess, just accepting hamster racism.
And then some girls oh, my God, I called them. Wow. In my notes, instead of putting hamster, I put squirrels. That was weird.
We are all breaking down.
Yeah. I don't know why, but these two girls come up to them and I'm like, oh, no, they're going to make fun of them for liking hamsters so much. But surprise, these girls, their names are June and kylie, and they both also love hamsters. And they just happen to own pashmina and Pinellope.
Wait, I'm sorry. Other seven year old girls like hamsters crazy.
You don't get a speaking role in the show unless you have a hamster.
What makes me think of like, you guys obviously aren't responsible enough to own hamsters because they get out. Arguably, the only girl who deserves her hamster is the girl that owns bju. Because beiju don't get out.
Yeah, but anyway, she'll get out of it.
Yeah.
Oh, God. What if Boss reunites with lara's dad and it's like, my hamster from when I was a kid. It's like, how old is the boss?
That would be fun. So, yeah, she makes some new friends. And then it's getting late and all of the hamsters are parting ways. They all head out, but the sleeping sock hamster is still in boss's house. And he's just like, well, I'll keep you. I'll name you snoozer. I'm like, whoa, whoa, man, that's weird. Hamster with a pet hamster. I don't know about this one.
I mean, if snoozer doesn't like it, he can do literally anything.
He really could. And then Hamtaro sneaks into his cage just in time. Laura didn't get home quite yet, and then he's like, oh, shit. I was going to follow her to school this morning. I hope she's okay.
Well, she didn't die.
Yeah. And she gets home and she's like, ham taro. Guess what? I made friends. And he's like, oh, thank God she didn't need me after all. And that's it. I enjoy this so far because it really is just a kids show.
Yeah.
It's just so formulaic and sweet and nonsense.
There's no weird dark twist coming along like hot. Hopefully we'll see. There is. Like, I think you sent us the pictures. There like 150 episodes of it, so yeah, there are something.
So many episodes.
Something happens to keep it going that long. Yeah. So then we get episode three and opens with the family having breakfast. And laura's mom is like, Laura toast. I'm like, Is that all she eats? That's not a good breakfast. Just got to have more food than that.
Dry toast, no. Butter, no. jelly?
No. And it's having breakfast. And Large dad basically saying, like, oh, man, we got a big project. I'm working late again tonight. Like, I have all week. And then Large Mom saying she's going to be teaching afternoon class. I don't know what at this point.
I thought maybe she was a community college teacher.
I wasn't sure what she was. Just a teacher of some sort. And then we got to Hamtaro wants to go to the clubhouse. And then he recaps all the friends he's made so far. He's like, talking. It's like, oh, I met Oxnard and Boss and of course, penelope. And I was like, of course, of course.
How could you forget?
Penelope isn't actually a hamster. She's just a nightmare hell beast underneath that sheep, because we never see her face. She's like mimi Q, the pokemon. Think about. Yeah, she also just says one word over and over again. So she's like the designated baby hamster. And the word she says over again says an awful lot, like, fuck you. That might just be me projecting, but that's what I heard.
I'll allow it.
And then Laura leaves the house, goes to school, and so does him taro. Because once again, nothing keeps that cage shut. It just doesn't matter. And then we see. He finds Oxnard crying again, as he does because he lost the sunflower seed again. And it's not one sunflower seed. It's just whichever one he's having that day because he eats them all. So just like, he gets so attached to the snack. And then Oxnard and Boss were looking for it, and antar was like, hey, wait a minute. Have you stood up ever? What? Oxnard stands up, and he is sitting on it. And then they meet oxnard got that big old butt. And then all three of them run off, and they meet up with their friends, and they see just three more friends there. They're like, okay, just bring people in. And here we get Maxwell the nerd, because he's got a book. You got panda, who looks like a panda. And we get Sandy, who's got, like, little tiger stripes and a ribbon, like a dancing ribbon. They all got one accessory because their hamsters, they don't have a lot of room for. More.
They don't got pockets.
They don't work at tjat fridays. You don't have flair. So then we oh, here's a random question for dexter. His family is an optometrist family, so he's got little classes on them. Do you guys think those are classes, actual classes, or do you think it's just a pattern in his firm? I couldn't tell the bow tie, which got the outline on it, but then his classes don't have an outline on them.
I think it's a convenient pattern that he's like, oh, these are my Hamster glasses. I'm too smart to know otherwise.
Okay, that's what I was thinking too. So we're all on the same page. There's a big controversy in the Ham community about dexter's class. I want to get that out of the way up front. We get new friends, and they join in, and then just the upside down frying pan jumps out and just start wandering around. And boss gets scared, tries to hit it, and it keeps moving out of the way, and Hamtar is like, Wait a minute. This smells funny. A sniff. sniff, a sniffs, a sniff. There's a lot of automotive in this show, a lot of side effects people have to say, and he's sniffing it, and turns out, bam. New friend. There's a Hamster underneath the frying pan. His name's cappy kathy, and he'll never speak again.
He lives under that fry.
Then they go to the clubhouse, and we see kathy still underneath the frying pan. I was like, how'd that fit in here? It's not a human frying pan. It's not huge, but it's like, that would be tough to get through that door and into tunnels. It's a security pan he feels safe with. And then howdy starts singing a weird song because he needs attention. And then Hamtar says they should make a designated play room in the clubhouse, even though it's all one big room, and then they should play Ham and go seek. And then we cut to Laura, who's at school and getting a test back, and she holds it up and freaks out that she got a ten. She only got a ten on a test? That's terrible. Teacher is like, hey, dummy, move your thumb. And she's like, oh, it's a 100. She actually says, I'm a genius in.
Front of the whole class after immediately being, like, making this beam.
So everyone looks at her and then exclaiming, I'm a genius. And then Travis is like, yeah, it was an open book test. Everyone got ace as at this point. I was like, Maybe she deserved that ten.
In this episode. This is the one where I find Ham, taro, and Laura the least, likeable, three episodes.
Oh, do I have to check off unlikable main character on the finger?
No, because she's generally likable. It's just this one. She's being a little brad, a little.
Bit, even if she's, like, having, like, oh, I got 100. You should have remembered it was an open book test. Yeah, it wasn't that long.
She got 100.
And then we come back to the hamsters, and we see Panda. He's making a little table. Because panda's families are carpenters, the hamster takes after their owner's profession in this world. And he's got just, like, a weird wood chip he uses as a hammer to make other things out of wood. I don't know what's happening, but I like pandas craftiness. And then oxnard and howdy are fighting over a toy truck, which, once again, I don't know how they have a toy truck for hamsters. Like, that's got to be really tiny. itty bitty as biddies of trucks. So they're fighting over that, and it breaks.
Oh, no.
And dexter scolds them for fighting over the toy thing. And like, no, that's what you get for fighting over it. I'm ida, and I'm a piece of shit this show. And I wanted to like dexter, because I used to have a cat named dexter, and this fucking guy, he just sucks. So after he skulls them, howdy starts chasing dexter, which leads to them running around the clubhouse, which leads to them breaking Panda's new table, which leads to panda starts chasing them, and they run past penelope and mess up her scarf, and they're just running around Charles in a hollow balloon. And then we see Boss huffing on a flower. A sniff, sniff, sniff. And he's lamenting romantically because it's a flower from biju's garden. Once again, never talk to her, but he'll steal her shit and smell it. Of course, this is not his preferred.
It doesn't smell like you because you've never been outside, but it reminds me of where you live.
Oh, God. Boss took a turn in this. I'm just saying. And everyone's running around yelling. And as he's smelling the flower, everyone runs past him and knocks him over and ruins his flower. That's when Boss says, Enough, and screams, and everyone stops, and he's like, if you're going to cause a mess, you got to fuck out my house. This isn't just your frontest room. This is my house. I sleep here. Get going. Get out of here. It kicks everybody out. And when they all get kicked out, oxnard's like, oh, I'm not sure what we did. He's like, yo, bro, what do you mean, what we did?
You ruined his house.
He just said what you did. And then they're walking home. Laura is talking to kana, and she's saying, like, wow, with grades like this, I could be a scientist. kana's like, yeah, maybe like, a hamster care expert. That's probably more your speed.
That's, like, the only thing you excel at. And even then, you don't give much care.
We can go home right now, find your hamster is not there. Then you get neither her. And then Laura says, like, oh, I want to go show this test off, or no. She's like, I should tell my parents. They should get one of those spark kid bumper stickers. I was like, Laura, fucking chill.
That's so fucking funny.
This is laura's. Like, you got a little high on your own supply here.
It's so of the time. Smart kid bumper sticker.
I don't know any kid that wants their parent having that bumper sticker. You're like, oh, you want to put a target on my back to get beat up at school? Cool. Thanks, mom and dad.
Hey, look at me and nerds in this car. nerd on board.
Careful. I'm a nerd. I bruise easily. Then you can take my lunch money. And then Laura says I should go to I should go to my mom's work while she's busy at work and show this test to her and brag about how smart I am at an open book test. Really starting to at Laura more I talk about. And they go to her store and turns out her mom works in a flower shop. And she's teaching a flower arrangement class. That's the class she'll staying late to teach and love it. She goes to show off. It's interesting. We see an anime with both parents alive in the child's life and then both have jobs. It's just rare. It's just rare to see that. So Laura goes in, is like, look, mom, I'm smart. I got 100 on my test. And right as her mom goes to look at it, someone in the store is like, oh, excuse me. I need help over here. And she's like, oh, I'll see it later. See it later for dinner. Hamtaro and kana. Your mom.
Mom, I'm fully your daughter.
You remembered my friend I met two days ago's. Name, but not me.
That's when it went from like, oh, laura's mom is bad with names too. laura's mom hates her child. Yes, her mom just hates her own child, her only child. I was like, god, her mom's savage.
All right, see you later, doormat. What?
That's not a name. See you later, chicken. I'm cooking for dinner tonight. What? And she's like, oh, well, maybe I'll go talk to my dad and tell him about my test. Her dad, who already said he's going to be working late tonight because he's busy, very busy. So she goes to a pay phone and calls him on the phone. And he's like we cut to him running around the office or like, talking to a bunch of people until answering a few phones. And then he answers the phone, and it's Laura. Hey, dad, it's me, your daughter. I did good. He's like, cool, see you later. And hangs up because he's busy. Both parents are busy, Laura.
He's very kind about it, though. He's like, hey, I'm really sorry. I'm really busy. We can talk about it later. Okay, honey. Goodbye.
All the love in the parental dynamic comes from the dad.
Yeah.
At this point. At this point. I'll get to it later. So then they go back to laura's house, and she's like, you know what? I'll show off my test to Antaro and he like looks at it.
He cares about me.
She shows off the test, and Antaro is like, cool paper. I'm going to chew that up and give the boss, I'm going to destroy.
The only thing that's making you happy right now.
And then the entire just starts running in the wheel. And then they're both like, look, he's happy for you. Yeah, sure. That's what that means.
Okay.
And then we cut to a boss saying like, I'm the strong, silent type who says, I'm a hamster that doesn't need anybody around. I do. I need people. I need my friends. I worry about them. I care for them. I've only known all of them for an hour. And then he says he's going to oh. And then snoozer starts talking in asleep and just saying, like, everybody needs somebody. Boss is like, you're right conscious. You're you're right. jiminy Cricket. I'm going to go get my friends. So why I think Hamtar even says, like, when he introduces, like, the new friends to everyone, he's like, oh, that's snoozer. He's the quiet, philosophical type. I'm like, what?
You've been asleep. You don't know what he's like. The oracle speaks.
He gives us predictions of the future. One time, oxnard was sitting in a room with snoozer by himself. And snoozer said how oxnard would die because of weird prophecies. So then Boss runs out of the clubhouse, and he's like, I got to get everybody back. I'm just going to run on top of this tree at this very end of this very thin branch and just scream for a bit. So he just runs up and he's like, everybody, I'm sorry. Come on back.
I don't actually know where any of you live.
I think he lives in the park, and they're all in houses. So in hampshire's world. He's in Europe and they're in Brazil. Yeah, it's far. So yeah, he just goes up on a branch and starts screaming for everybody. And at the same time, all the Hamsters are coming back to the park being like, we should all apologize to Boss for messing up his house. So they're already in the park, and then they don't hear him yelling for all of them. But then when he's on the branch, he slips and dangling from it precariously. And then they hear him crying for help after that. So they all run to see what's happening.
Selective hearing.
Yeah. And my ham tower sees him dangling. He's like, I'm the hero. I'm going to save him. He runs up the tree and goes on the branch, but then stop short on the branch. Like, I feel like he could have gone a little further down that branch, but he's reaching his hand out like, Boss, give me your hand. He's like, I can't. It's almost nonexistent. It's just my body. I don't have arms. I just have appendages attached to my lumpy body. So as Hamtar was reaching out, we cut away to the dexter, saying like, I got an idea. And he runs off. And then we see Ham tire reach out for Boss, and the branch snaps and they come falling out of the tree. And then we see everyone running out underneath of them with, like a grass bedding. They made from, like a bunch of grass clippings and like a fireman net or shoot or whatever. And they catch Hamtar own boss. They bounce on it and they're safe. Everyone's like, yeah.
Saved.
And for some reason, Hamtar was like, oh, yeah, I was going to give you this piece of paper from Laura that has perfect marks on it. So he understands Laura speaking to a degree. And they're like, oh, what's perfect marks. And maxwell's like, it means you did 100%. You got everything right on a piece of paper or something. I was like, nerd. I don't know why hanson brought that up.
It does not matter.
Boss says, you guys all got perfect mark today for saving my life, okay? And then he says, there's no need to be all serious. Let's just go back to the clubhouse and have fun. Boss, santaro and Maxwell are sitting at a table drinking tea. They got a little tea set and understand how brewing tea works, I guess. And they're just reflecting on everyone else having fun at the clubhouse. It's good to be back. And then back home, laura's dad gets home early. He's like, yeah, I said fuck came home today. We're still going to be there.
We're so behind the schedule. Anyway, it doesn't really matter.
If I get fired, I get fired.
Sure, we just moved to this new city for my job, but that's fine.
I can give it. Wait a minute, wait a minute. Hold on. Yeah, because one of the guys says like, hey, can we get an extension? He's like, we're already way overdue on this project. That's a good point. I didn't think about that. Yeah. So laura's dad's home and then her mom's home after teaching her class. And they're having dinner or just sitting around the table talking. And Laura says like, now I can show you my test. I got perfect score on it. I got perfect marks. And laura's dad says, if you got pissed yeah, I'm sure. And Hamsters are from Mars. And I was like, yo, fucking pairs.
Supportive.
Just like I was like, wow, both of her parents are pretty shitty.
My child smart.
Never have you met her mother? She can't remember anything. She's like, wow, this dynamic is weird. Kind of toxic, what's happening here? And then she shows off her test and her dad actually jumps up from the chair. Like, what? Like genuinely shocked. She's like, well, I guess as a reward, you can stay up for an extra 30 minutes past your bedtime.
Wow. What are you going to do with those 30 minutes?
Well, that time I was like, god, that's that's what it was like to be a kid. You could just stay awake longer. That was a reward. And now I crave sleep at all times. And then we get the usual sign off of her, just filling out her diary, talking to Antaro on the desk. And then that's it.
What a time. What a joy.
Just delightful.
Completely simple.
I mean, Boss is definitely simply for bj.
Wow.
But yeah, I noticed I think we talked about all fair, but like, I noticed even with the show, it was only 17 minutes. Like, they got it's. They're stretching every minute they can of a hamster show. And like, I get it. There's not a lot of compelling plot for hamsters. But then there's also 150 episodes. Yeah. What happens here?
Well, I don't know. It's a kids show. You think about like, phineas and ferb had over 200 episodes. But what do they do with that? Each episode was the same, but they.
Do insane shit of like, let's go back in time. It's like, sure, the hamsters can't get too crazy, can they?
Who knows?
We'll see. By the end, they're stopping, like terrorist plots. And it's a whole Homeland arc. It's crazy.
Maxwell discovers perpetual energy.
My favorite arc is the wizard School arc.
Yeah, that's a good one.
Yeah.
Oxnard seed is actually like the seed of power containing, like, the evil forces. Nuts.
That was fun and cute. I would buy a Hamtaro plushie.
I feel like that's a series where you could be like, I'm a hamtara fan, but you're not going to get the shitty weaves that are like, do you know what happens in episode 74? If not, you're a true fan. It's just like, everyone's a Hamtaro fan. It's fucking precious.
This is a show for children.
This is the only show that represents their own fandom in the show where they go up to a notebook and they're like, oh, hamsters. Yeah, hamsters fuck.
We're best friends.
If you go to any con and you're like, hey, Hamtara. Yeah, Hamtaro. We're roommates now.
It just works like that. It's just that simple. I did have to check off Big eater on the bingo card because hamsters and then animal sidekick. But mostly for Laura.
That counts. Every human has an animal sidekick because the only friends Laura has must have hamsters.
It's a requirement. It's very selective. I did also put window seat for Bishop. Yeah, that was Nicholas, by the way. And there's not a lot going in this show. So I don't think we were going to get the titty score.
I mean, with how they treat the female hamsters, I wouldn't be surprised.
But yeah, that's ham toro.
Anyway, who do you can yeah.
So I wanted to do a fun thing where I tried to find, like, a buzzfeed. Which hamster are you quiz? But I'm going to drop something else into the chat for you all. Just a fun little game since everything sucks and we need it. So we're going to build our Hamtaro. ocs.
Oh, no.
This is so much better than I could have ever hoped.
He uses flash. This might not be around for long. Yeah.
If you're listening to this, after 2020, this is a relic.
We caught it just in time.
But yeah, we are just going to build some hamsters because we need this.
Yeah, you need to feel something good for once. I'm sure this would be enabled. Boring as hell of us, too. So I would just throw this up on Twitter.
We'll throw it up on Twitter. But this is what we're doing as we close it out. But yeah. Are we there yet? Sure. It's fun. It's good. I'm not going to watch all 150 episodes, but okay.
Because here's the thing. I think we need to clarify what are we there yet? Means now. Because at least as far as I know, we were going on the assumption of are we there enough? Like, would we continue watching this versus not just a like it or not like it?
Yeah. Well, yeah, I guess then we are not there. But yeah, it's fun. It's pleasant. It's fine.
It's fine.
Show this to your kids. They will watch it. But you and a sophisticated adult podcast listener, yeah, you don't need it. It's not worth your time.
If you just want to get blazed off your ass and just not think about anything and need some pastel colors in your life, maybe watch it.
But yeah, why not?
Even for anime, you probably have better stuff to do with your time than watch the sober. Yeah.
So, yeah, what do we have going on next week?
Next week? I think watching the hamsters eat the sunflower seeds. I'm not going to check off delicious cartoon foods on the bingo card, but they were real into the sunflower seeds and it did make me want to crave delicious cartoon food again. Okay, so I figured it was recently added to Netflix as of this recording. God knows when that is retrospect, but we should watch an anime called Food Wars.
Oh, good.
I've only heard the best things about this one.
It's like Iron Chef. The anime. I want to see anime. Bobby flay.
Bobby Anna flay.
Yes. There it is.
We found it. We got there.
You know, we're going to need to do food worth anymore. It's not going to beat that.
Yeah. No. If there's a show you would like us to watch, you can send your recommendations to us. Our email is rweeveryet@gmail.com. Or you can reach out to us on Twitter and Instagram at arweevariat. On both. You can find me on Twitter and Instagram at Mr. Patrick dugan.
You can find me on Instagram at queen. Period weebu and on twitter at queen underscore weebu and queen underscore weebu art.
You can find me on Twitter. abts Brendan stands for Almost Better Than Silence, which is a video game podcast I also do. Oh, and me and Doug, co host of Almost Burn Towns, were on another podcast called kami House Party, which is a Dragon Ball Z podcast. You probably heard the promo in the last few episodes. We did a promo exchange with them, so give them a lesson for more anime.
Thank you to camille ruley for her artwork. And thank you to Louis zong for theme song stories off the album Beats. You can find all of louie's music at Louisong bandcamp.com. Thank you, and we hope you'll join us next week as we learn to live with anime.
Goodbye.
I'm dexter. I know it.