WEBVTT 00:00.090 --> 00:26.322 In the 1930s, at Oxford, two professors found common ground in their love for myths. One night, they delved deep into a discussion about the truth in myths. The first, a firm believer in the profound truths of these tales, inspired his friend, an atheist, to see them in a new light. This exchange led to a remarkable transformation in the skeptic. 00:26.466 --> 00:28.566 He began to view Christianity as a. 00:28.588 --> 00:55.070 True myth, rich in universal truths. This new perspective deeply influenced his writing, infusing it with allegory and depth. Their friendship and intellectual discussions were pivotal in shaping both of their literary careers. And these two friends were. I'm Joe. My pal over there is Kurt, and we are dudes in progress. 01:08.550 --> 01:09.730 Hey, Joe. 01:10.150 --> 01:12.180 Hey, Kurt. What's going on, man? 01:13.110 --> 01:17.000 I'm just getting ready for a trip to Disney World. 01:17.850 --> 01:19.800 Do you know who those two friends were? 01:20.490 --> 01:21.590 It wasn't you and. 01:21.660 --> 01:22.470 Huh. 01:24.250 --> 01:30.070 You had me there for a minute. I'm going to guess C. S. Lewis and Tolkien. 01:30.570 --> 01:31.878 Exactly, exactly. 01:31.964 --> 01:33.398 J. R. Tolkien, of course, the author. 01:33.414 --> 01:40.460 Of Lord of the Rings, and C. S. Lewis, the author of many books, but probably best known for the chronicles of. 01:40.990 --> 01:42.554 Ah, I win the prize. 01:42.602 --> 01:43.200 Yeah. 01:43.810 --> 01:47.502 When you were telling that story, the. 01:47.636 --> 01:49.262 Words that were popping in my head. 01:49.316 --> 01:52.910 Were collaboration and teamwork. 01:53.350 --> 01:54.050 Yeah. 01:54.200 --> 02:02.834 And I think those are extraordinarily powerful things that I've always been fond of. 02:03.032 --> 02:06.470 Whether it was in my sporting pursuits. 02:07.050 --> 02:09.558 Or collaborating at work. 02:09.644 --> 02:12.630 Collaboration software is really where my specialty. 02:13.530 --> 02:20.646 Ended up, going towards using software to collaborate. But, yeah, I think they're very powerful communication. 02:20.838 --> 02:21.338 Yeah. 02:21.424 --> 02:22.300 Love that. 02:23.470 --> 02:44.094 They were very good friends, but they didn't share complete 100% agreement. They weren't completely in agreement on even religion, even Christianity and worldview, but they. They shared a. They shared a common interest, and they. 02:44.132 --> 02:45.946 Built this deep, deep friendship. 02:46.058 --> 02:53.714 It's a very cool story if you get a chance to check it out. That little couple of paragraphs that I read doesn't really do it justice, but. 02:53.832 --> 02:54.894 It'S a neat story. 02:54.952 --> 02:56.230 It's a neat friendship. 02:57.210 --> 02:59.686 Well, I think friendship, part of being. 02:59.708 --> 03:01.718 A friend, is respecting the other person. 03:01.804 --> 03:09.126 And what they value and to listen and not get into arguments that are. 03:09.148 --> 03:10.710 Going to break up the friendship. 03:10.870 --> 03:14.330 Yeah. That brings me to a question. We'll flesh this out during the show. 03:14.480 --> 03:18.780 But what is your initial response when I ask what makes a good friend? 03:20.450 --> 03:30.480 My first thing is probably trust was the one thing that was going through my mind. 03:31.170 --> 03:34.340 Complete trust in someone else. 03:34.870 --> 03:40.882 I think it starts with shared interests. You seem to bond with other people. 03:40.936 --> 03:43.186 That have similar interests now that they. 03:43.208 --> 03:52.966 Were professors, so they had the same vocation, intellectuals and that kind of thing. 03:53.068 --> 03:54.326 I think if I look back on. 03:54.348 --> 04:05.130 All the friendships I've had, they've always started with common interest, but I think trust and reliability, respect for each other are some of the things that definitely. 04:05.280 --> 04:07.274 When you've said this at 03:00 a.m. 04:07.312 --> 04:10.586 If someone calls, are you the type. 04:10.608 --> 04:23.838 Of person that's going to run out and help somebody, or if they have a really bad day or something traumatic happens? You're the one where they're there for you in those times of trouble and. 04:23.924 --> 04:25.138 Times of fun, too. 04:25.224 --> 04:26.290 Having fun together. 04:26.440 --> 04:27.714 Definitely. Yeah. 04:27.752 --> 04:29.218 Who are your 03:00 a.m.? Friends? 04:29.304 --> 04:29.940 Right. 04:30.310 --> 04:33.538 Yeah, but you're right, Kurt. I mean, most of the friendships that. 04:33.544 --> 04:37.246 I've built have been the catalyst was. 04:37.288 --> 04:38.614 Some kind of common interest. 04:38.732 --> 04:39.110 Sure. 04:39.180 --> 04:40.360 I think about us. 04:41.050 --> 04:44.310 Our friendship was built on the common interest of podcasting. 04:45.210 --> 04:46.774 We had no idea that we were. 04:46.812 --> 04:49.222 Going to become this good of friends. 04:49.276 --> 04:49.782 Right. 04:49.916 --> 04:51.066 We just knew that we had this. 04:51.088 --> 04:58.874 Common interest and knew enough about each other to know that, okay, we'll at least share this common interest and see. 04:58.912 --> 04:59.834 What happens from there. 04:59.872 --> 05:00.170 Right. 05:00.240 --> 05:00.954 For sure. 05:01.072 --> 05:01.450 Yeah. 05:01.520 --> 05:03.434 But I think that's how they start. 05:03.472 --> 05:05.894 They start off as a common interest. 05:05.952 --> 05:07.166 And today we're going to talk about that. 05:07.188 --> 05:10.638 We're going to talk about how to be a good friend. It starts off with, you got to. 05:10.644 --> 05:12.080 Have a friend, right? 05:12.770 --> 05:14.734 You got to be a friend to have a friend. 05:14.852 --> 05:20.254 Yeah. Well, you got to have a friend in order to be a good friend. And, yes, you're right. You've got to be a friend to be a good friend. 05:20.292 --> 05:22.414 And we'll talk a little bit about that. 05:22.532 --> 05:24.094 My idea about what makes a good. 05:24.132 --> 05:34.214 Friend is you're comfortable with each other in the good times and the bad. You know that they're going to pour as much into the relationship as you. 05:34.252 --> 05:39.686 Are, and sometimes when you're not pouring into it, they still are. And when they're not pouring into it, you still are. 05:39.868 --> 05:41.766 You build each other up, and you. 05:41.788 --> 05:46.122 Can count on each other. Like I said, that 03:00 a.m.. Friend. That's what makes a good friend. 05:46.176 --> 05:47.818 That's the 03:00 a.m.. Test. 05:47.984 --> 05:49.626 Who will you take a call from. 05:49.728 --> 05:57.098 At 03:00 a.m. And who do you think you could call at 03:00 a.m. That's a very interesting way to think about friendships. 05:57.194 --> 05:59.066 Yeah, I like that analogy. 05:59.098 --> 05:59.706 You've dated. 05:59.818 --> 06:01.646 Also, I was thinking, have you ever. 06:01.668 --> 06:12.100 Been betrayed by a friend? I was talking about trust. I can think back in high school, someone who betrayed me. And I was kind of shocked it was over a girl. 06:13.270 --> 06:14.580 Mine was, too. 06:15.030 --> 06:16.878 That's very interesting, Kurt. 06:16.974 --> 06:17.714 Mine was, too. 06:17.752 --> 06:19.506 I had a friend betray me when. 06:19.528 --> 06:20.966 We were in high school, and this. 06:20.988 --> 06:24.518 Was a friend that I grew up with. I'm not going to go into the. 06:24.524 --> 06:26.770 Details, but a girl was definitely involved. 06:26.930 --> 06:29.286 And it was a pretty dramatic thing. 06:29.308 --> 06:30.730 For me, I'll be honest with you. 06:30.880 --> 06:32.490 I just didn't expect it. 06:32.560 --> 06:37.882 Yeah, I would say I don't usually do drama, but that particular moment, I did. 06:38.016 --> 06:43.102 You asked me this question before, and I think I asked it of you. 06:43.236 --> 06:47.470 But let's revisit that again. Do you think you make friends easily? 06:48.210 --> 06:55.890 That's a great question. I'm an introvert, I think by heart, so I wouldn't say I make friends easily. 06:56.550 --> 07:03.540 I'm not really good introducing myself in a crowd kind of thing. 07:03.910 --> 07:08.920 But I think once the relationship is established, then I can be a pretty good friend. 07:09.690 --> 07:15.522 I'm not great at introducing myself in a crowd unless I feel some kind of common thread. 07:15.586 --> 07:21.174 Like I know somebody who knows somebody and I can say, hey, you know. 07:21.212 --> 07:23.014 Bob, you know Kurt. 07:23.142 --> 07:24.714 Yeah, I think Kurt does that. 07:24.752 --> 07:25.770 Do you know Kurt? 07:26.350 --> 07:28.278 I think Nick does that. Do you know Nick? 07:28.374 --> 07:29.046 I don't know Nick. 07:29.078 --> 07:31.754 But then you kind of feel either. 07:31.792 --> 07:33.402 You do know Nick or you don't know Nick. 07:33.466 --> 07:52.366 And it's important to make friends, especially as adult guys. We're both in our mid 50s, but I think once you get to your mid twenty s, I think it becomes harder and harder to make new friends. New friends that become deep relationships. 07:52.478 --> 07:52.898 Right? 07:52.984 --> 07:53.570 Yeah. 07:53.720 --> 07:56.754 I didn't have any social life while. 07:56.792 --> 08:06.566 My kids were in school and I was raising them. I can't say. I mean, you're beyond your high school and college friends. 08:06.748 --> 08:07.782 You're in that in between. 08:07.836 --> 08:16.906 I mean, some of the people that you hang out with at times, I didn't have a lot of social life at all because I was running around with them. I mean, maybe the parents of some. 08:16.928 --> 08:19.046 Of the kids, but I never felt. 08:19.078 --> 08:25.818 Like I really had a lot of close friends. Maybe the best I could do would probably be my coworkers. 08:25.994 --> 08:26.720 Yeah. 08:27.490 --> 08:31.150 But now I agree. I think we've talked about how important. 08:31.220 --> 08:38.100 Relationships are, and I should make a more attempt, really. 08:38.470 --> 08:41.940 And, yeah, it's not always been a priority for me. 08:42.950 --> 08:48.786 So it's interesting we talk about this common thread, these common interests, and if. 08:48.808 --> 08:50.166 I had to go make friends right. 08:50.188 --> 08:56.886 Now, if something happened and I was friendless. And I know that for my mental health and for my well being, I. 08:56.908 --> 08:57.926 Needed to go out and make some. 08:57.948 --> 09:01.962 Friends and make some connections. I'm trying to think of how I would do that. 09:02.096 --> 09:02.586 Yeah. 09:02.688 --> 09:07.306 How would I go make friends right now? I'd have to identify some interests that. 09:07.328 --> 09:16.062 I have, some clear interest. Sports or tech or music or podcasting or whatever it might be. 09:16.116 --> 09:16.878 Right? Yeah. 09:16.964 --> 09:21.120 A club or a church or somewhere where people meet. 09:22.450 --> 09:23.102 That's really. 09:23.156 --> 09:28.702 And, boy, the people that do. My dad is so good. I'm always amazed. 09:28.846 --> 09:30.706 He worked in the construction industry when. 09:30.728 --> 09:40.200 He was working and in the local area. The town where I live is where his company was, and we'll be out somewhere. He runs into people he knows all the time. 09:41.130 --> 09:44.966 And I think back of all the work I've been doing, kind of the. 09:44.988 --> 09:47.906 Home repair kind of work, and I think my dad. 09:47.938 --> 09:50.314 How in the world did you do. 09:50.352 --> 09:52.634 The things that you did working on. 09:52.672 --> 09:55.834 Cars and the house he built, the. 09:55.872 --> 10:00.570 House where we lived. I'm just amazed because I got YouTube. 10:01.090 --> 10:01.840 Right. 10:02.690 --> 10:10.480 But you got to think he had relationships and friends that he called and asked questions of or they would come over to help. 10:12.390 --> 10:19.202 That's an interesting thought, because part of what I think hinders us making good. 10:19.256 --> 10:22.254 Friends and developing deep relationships as adults. 10:22.382 --> 10:24.906 Is that rugged individualism. 10:25.038 --> 10:25.670 Right. 10:25.820 --> 10:34.502 Your dad sounded like a rugged individualist, but he also was not afraid to ask who not how. 10:34.636 --> 10:36.866 And we're going to explore that sometime. 10:36.978 --> 10:51.882 Maybe not, but you may hear that phrase from Kurt or me commonly, who not how, right? And that has to do know, building a business and getting things done and stuff like that. But he was not afraid to ask. 10:51.936 --> 10:52.970 Who not how, right? 10:53.040 --> 10:56.030 Oh, yeah, for sure. I mean, he had a lot of connections. 10:56.690 --> 10:57.920 They know a guy. 10:58.450 --> 10:59.200 Yeah. 11:00.290 --> 11:05.140 And that's the way it was done back then. It's the way it's done now. I mean, actually, I know a guy. 11:05.750 --> 11:11.570 But we have so many different outlets for building relationships. 11:11.910 --> 11:16.102 I mean, you have a lot of relationships across the country and really across. 11:16.156 --> 11:18.790 The world as a result of your podcast. 11:20.090 --> 11:31.162 Geeking on wdW.com, if you want to check it out. Geeking on wdW.com. Because of your podcast and that community. And I know some of those people. 11:31.296 --> 11:36.346 And those are as good a friends as one could ask for some of them. 11:36.368 --> 11:36.940 Right. 11:38.510 --> 11:40.362 I had no idea when I started. 11:40.416 --> 11:43.566 A podcast on Disney World that I. 11:43.588 --> 11:51.486 Would meet so many incredible people. I mean, looking back on it now, it kind of makes sense that these. 11:51.588 --> 11:58.850 People have a childlike fascination and curiosity and positivity. 12:01.430 --> 12:03.700 They just blow my mind all the time. 12:04.890 --> 12:08.822 And it's really awkward to meet people. 12:08.876 --> 12:12.470 From the Internet in person. It can be. 12:12.620 --> 12:32.010 Yet these people have that skill really intrigues me that they would reach out to me, know, have the trust and just being forward to say hi and start the conversation. 12:32.090 --> 12:40.878 But it's been one of the most amazing mysteries from my podcasting efforts that has turned out exceptionally well. 12:41.044 --> 12:42.938 Well, I'm not a Disney fan. 12:43.114 --> 12:43.838 Right. 12:44.004 --> 13:13.580 I don't mind Disney, but I'm not a Disney fan to the extent, not even close to the extent that you are or any of your community is, I would say I'm probably not a Disney fan. But I do know this. Disney people are special people. I've had an opportunity to interact with a handful on a close level, and they're special people. They're kind and generous and fun loving and interested. 13:13.950 --> 13:14.602 Right. 13:14.736 --> 13:16.902 You're right about that kind of childlike. 13:17.046 --> 13:22.682 Mentality, which is what we need. We need that curiosity to build friendships. 13:22.746 --> 13:32.960 Yeah. And there's another common thing, is there's an enemy that we all share. There's a nemesis out there. 13:33.350 --> 13:34.146 Yeah. 13:34.328 --> 13:35.298 People like me. 13:35.384 --> 13:36.020 Exactly. 13:39.270 --> 13:40.706 You read my mind. 13:40.888 --> 13:42.174 That's so funny. 13:42.302 --> 14:02.950 People who make fun of people who love Disney and that, like, why would you go to that place all the time? Isn't that for kids? Isn't it too expensive? Isn't all the negative things that they can think of? I went there and I didn't have a good time. Or how could you get that from people? You'll get criticized from your coworkers. 14:03.110 --> 14:03.722 Absolutely. 14:03.856 --> 14:07.260 And so that's another thing that bonds people together. 14:07.630 --> 14:09.818 Well, Disney people may not be a. 14:09.824 --> 14:12.954 Fan of me, but I'm a fan of them, just not Disney itself. 14:13.072 --> 14:15.566 What we're showing here is there were. 14:15.588 --> 14:21.806 Some common interests, I think, of the relationships that I've had, the people from church, people I've met through podcasting when. 14:21.828 --> 14:27.234 I was into bicycling and road biking, the people at the bike shop I. 14:27.272 --> 14:30.914 Still have some kind of connection with. We have these common interests, and we. 14:30.952 --> 14:34.578 Build on those common interests. But then, like I said, we have. 14:34.584 --> 14:37.942 To be intentional about it. We have to start building a connection at some level. 14:38.076 --> 14:47.654 Show interest in them, show interest in their opinions and their experiences, and ask how they're doing, and just kind of. 14:47.772 --> 14:50.530 Build that connection within that safe space. 14:50.620 --> 14:52.522 Of the shared interest still. 14:52.576 --> 14:52.986 Right. 14:53.088 --> 14:57.386 But you're still building a connection. You can share stories and experiences, have. 14:57.408 --> 14:59.146 Kind of a give and take, but. 14:59.168 --> 15:04.558 You really have to intentionally build a connection. You identified kind of people you're interested. 15:04.644 --> 15:08.170 In, but you got to start building a connection somehow. 15:08.330 --> 15:09.534 I'll tell you, one of the other. 15:09.572 --> 15:13.038 Experience that I always look back on. 15:13.124 --> 15:39.766 Really fondly was my going down to a technical conference, and this is where my Disney world started from. And I was really intimidated by some of the conference goers and the people who spoke up on stage, but I was always the person that went in the front row. I'm very attentive. I enjoy the learning aspect of it. I marveled at the content and the character of the people that were speaking. 15:39.948 --> 15:41.018 And I did that for a couple. 15:41.024 --> 15:42.940 Of years, and I didn't know anybody. 15:43.550 --> 15:44.486 Going to these conferences. 15:44.518 --> 15:47.322 I went all by myself, 10,000 people. 15:47.456 --> 15:52.038 And it was fine because, hey, like I said, I'm an introvert, but I'll. 15:52.054 --> 15:56.686 Tell you, Joe, that first year that I said, you know what? And they were all bloggers and I. 15:56.708 --> 16:01.358 Would interact with them on blogs. There was no Facebook or Instagram or. 16:01.364 --> 16:03.914 Any of those things at this point yet, but there was blogging. 16:03.962 --> 16:05.902 And I went to an event. 16:05.956 --> 16:23.522 They had a little get together outside of a restaurant on the boardwalk at Disney World. And I just put myself out there. I said, hey, I said to my wife, if this doesn't work, I'll be back in like five minutes. Well, I ended up staying till about midnight. We ended up going over to the ESPN club. 16:23.586 --> 16:26.226 And I'll tell you what, those relationships. 16:26.258 --> 16:28.774 That were built at that conference because, same thing. 16:28.892 --> 16:30.266 Well, we had the same interest and. 16:30.288 --> 16:37.194 We had a very unique software that we worked in. So we had commonality of a lot. 16:37.232 --> 16:39.434 Of things that we did and we. 16:39.472 --> 16:52.994 Learned from each other. And we were also, I always say, the bastards of it, because no one understood our software except for the people that did. And so we shared that in common. And I just had this birthday last. 16:53.032 --> 17:00.994 Week and still in Facebook, on my Facebook page, people from that goes back. 17:01.032 --> 17:06.738 20 years ago, those people are still connected to this day and probably aren't still doing that software anymore. 17:06.914 --> 17:10.982 It's phenomenal. And to add to that, the next. 17:11.036 --> 17:12.582 Few years that I went, I saw. 17:12.636 --> 17:16.278 People every single year and had just. 17:16.364 --> 17:25.914 Huge fun and look forward to it. Matter of fact, I saw someone post the nostalgia of walking that path between the swan and the dolph, and people still remember those times that we spent together. 17:26.032 --> 17:30.314 And yeah, it just totally changed my. 17:30.352 --> 17:35.070 Experience of going to conferences, knowing people and just having laughs and fun all the time. 17:35.220 --> 17:37.406 But you allowed yourself to do it, right. 17:37.588 --> 17:43.674 I stepped out of my comfort zone and the reward was just tremendous, really. 17:43.812 --> 17:47.838 It was really my interest in podcasting. 17:47.934 --> 17:52.660 And started from that because there were some podcasts that were built out of that community, too. 17:53.430 --> 17:55.366 I've made some really good friends in. 17:55.388 --> 17:58.726 Podcasting, friends that to this day, like. 17:58.748 --> 18:01.958 You said, they'll connect with me or I'll connect with them. 18:02.044 --> 18:10.520 Happy birthday or merry Christmas or texts. Not just your typical Facebook post, which is cool, right? 18:10.890 --> 18:12.166 I love to see those as much. 18:12.188 --> 18:17.210 As anybody, but I'll get a text from these guys. Oh, there's Dave, man. I'm glad to hear from him. 18:17.280 --> 18:17.754 Right. 18:17.872 --> 18:19.338 And then you'll kind of build a. 18:19.344 --> 18:24.526 Little mini connection again, and that might fade a little bit, but you have. 18:24.548 --> 18:29.806 These lifelong connections that you've intentionally built because you shared an interest and you. 18:29.828 --> 18:31.694 Showed an interest, you shared your own. 18:31.732 --> 18:34.442 Stories, and you became just a little bit vulnerable. 18:34.586 --> 18:36.786 And that's something us guys don't like. 18:36.808 --> 18:40.546 To talk about a lot, but it's important, right? We become a little bit vulnerable, and. 18:40.568 --> 18:48.150 Whether we say we do or not we do, it's about give and take, right? 18:48.300 --> 18:48.614 Yeah. 18:48.652 --> 18:52.118 Well, podcasting again, it's a medium where. 18:52.124 --> 18:56.710 You put yourself out there and take criticism, and it's a grind sometimes. 18:56.860 --> 19:01.274 It's a lonely hobby sometimes, too. 19:01.392 --> 19:02.074 Sitting at home. 19:02.112 --> 19:02.314 Sure. 19:02.352 --> 19:19.440 It can be with a microphone and wondering if anyone's listening. So you relate to each other in that. And there's things that we do, whether it's equipment or just how you advertise or get people to know about you. Yeah. There's so much common interest to share there. 19:20.210 --> 19:26.900 Now, where the rubber really meets the road is this next part. You got to deepen the relationship. 19:27.670 --> 19:29.106 At some point, if you're going to. 19:29.128 --> 19:40.758 Make a good friend, you got to deepen the relationship. You got to deepen this interaction that we have with each other that might be promising to show up every Saturday morning, right? 19:40.844 --> 19:41.142 Yeah. 19:41.196 --> 19:43.074 And that might be, let's say you're. 19:43.122 --> 19:45.062 Three months into that Saturday morning or. 19:45.116 --> 19:59.866 Six months into that Saturday morning, and you notice that your friend is a little off, is a. Joe's not. Joe just doesn't seem himself, or Kurt just doesn't seem himself, or Mike just. 19:59.888 --> 20:01.974 Doesn'T seem himself, whatever it might be, right? 20:02.112 --> 20:02.462 Yeah. 20:02.516 --> 20:04.014 And then you ask how they're doing, right? 20:04.052 --> 20:05.230 Is something going on, man? 20:05.300 --> 20:06.400 You doing okay? 20:07.250 --> 20:09.280 When you start going down that road. 20:10.210 --> 20:19.006 Where you start to share struggles and you start to share the ugly part of life, that's when it really starts to get deep. 20:19.038 --> 20:21.666 And I'm not talking about just pouring your heart out right away. 20:21.768 --> 20:22.866 You know a guy for an hour. 20:22.888 --> 20:31.382 And you're telling them about all your stuff. But it is a process, right? And you almost have to be intuitive about it. You have to be intentional about it. 20:31.436 --> 20:40.626 But you almost have to be intuitive about it to understand, okay, this guy has made enough emotional deposits, enough deposits. 20:40.658 --> 20:41.882 In my emotional bank account. 20:41.936 --> 20:43.306 And I don't know where I heard. 20:43.488 --> 20:45.466 That analogy before, but we all have. 20:45.488 --> 20:47.706 Kind of an emotional bank account, right? 20:47.808 --> 20:52.634 People are making deposits, and people are making withdrawals. We sure know the people that are making withdrawals, right? 20:52.672 --> 20:52.874 Yeah. 20:52.912 --> 20:57.486 Those are the people that are just sucking the energy right out of us. And we also know the people that. 20:57.508 --> 21:03.294 Are making deposits that give an encouraging word or show up when they promise. 21:03.342 --> 21:06.562 They'Re going to show up or offer. 21:06.696 --> 21:13.646 Some kind of value to your life. So there comes a time that relationship deepens. 21:13.838 --> 21:16.694 It could be just watching a football game together. 21:16.892 --> 21:19.542 It could be just hanging out, doing. 21:19.596 --> 21:21.158 A podcast together, right? 21:21.244 --> 21:25.222 It could be biking together or attending whatever. 21:25.276 --> 21:27.894 It might be grabbing a drink, going. 21:27.932 --> 21:29.866 Out to lunch, something like that. 21:30.048 --> 21:35.866 There comes a time that that relationship, as you're making a friend, goes just. 21:35.968 --> 21:40.854 That one kind of nick of a level, and that's when you find out about that friendship. 21:40.902 --> 21:43.294 You find out what they're made of, and you find out what you're made. 21:43.332 --> 21:44.686 Of, and you find out if this. 21:44.708 --> 21:46.682 Is somebody that can be trusted. 21:46.826 --> 21:48.046 I mean, you don't really think about. 21:48.068 --> 21:52.650 It at the time. You're making it very intentional and obvious. 21:52.740 --> 22:03.060 But remember, I had a pal that we started by working together on a project at work and then started doing. 22:03.430 --> 22:05.618 Walking at lunchtime together. 22:05.784 --> 22:12.626 And those conversations, sometimes they were just hilarious or things that we saw funny. 22:12.738 --> 22:22.486 I think he listened to Howard Stern. I remember him talking about Howard Stern. A. But, yeah, sometimes those conversations got pretty real and things that he was dealing. 22:22.518 --> 22:28.474 With, or vice versa. Yeah, it became a really good relationship. 22:28.592 --> 22:33.086 I mean, going out for a walk has always been therapeutic for me, but. 22:33.108 --> 22:37.934 Then have a good friend to chat along and share some funny things, stuff. 22:37.972 --> 22:42.110 You'Re doing, movies you're watching, whatever or work you're doing. 22:42.260 --> 22:46.066 We traded work secrets or helped each. 22:46.088 --> 22:50.100 Other out, working through projects and problems that we were working on, too. 22:51.590 --> 22:55.540 But would you consider this person a friend right now? 22:55.910 --> 22:57.814 Yeah, but one I've lost touch with. 22:57.852 --> 22:59.766 Because he left the company that I. 22:59.788 --> 23:03.686 Work with, which is unfortunate when you. 23:03.708 --> 23:19.354 Lose that common interest, that foundational common interest that we talked about before, that we allow that to disturb the relationship. We allow that to not, I guess. 23:19.392 --> 23:20.862 Eliminate is kind of a strong word. 23:20.916 --> 23:25.934 But dampen the relationship. Yeah, I don't know why. 23:26.052 --> 23:28.718 It's interesting. It's funny, I've heard you say this, too. 23:28.804 --> 23:31.566 Sometimes people kind of just fade out. 23:31.588 --> 23:34.938 Of our lives when they were kind of important at one point. 23:35.124 --> 23:39.618 And maybe you have to trust that process, that they have faded out of. 23:39.624 --> 23:40.610 Their lives for a reason. 23:40.680 --> 23:54.326 But maybe you think back to yourself and you think, was I the type of friend that I needed to be? But sometimes that does happen. Sometimes people just fade out of their. 23:54.348 --> 23:55.062 Out of your lives. 23:55.116 --> 23:56.854 But when you look back fondly with. 23:56.892 --> 23:58.006 I mean, I hear you talking about. 23:58.028 --> 24:02.074 This guy that you walked with, it sounded like for a moment, you guys. 24:02.112 --> 24:03.306 Were very good friends. 24:03.408 --> 24:04.154 Absolutely. 24:04.352 --> 24:04.858 Yeah. 24:04.944 --> 24:07.318 And really, it was probably the physical. 24:07.414 --> 24:09.830 Change of him not being around anymore. 24:09.990 --> 24:10.362 Right. 24:10.416 --> 24:11.600 That made the difference. 24:12.450 --> 24:15.326 So that's an important part of it, isn't it? 24:15.428 --> 24:18.894 The consistency, the making sure that you. 24:18.932 --> 24:23.614 Stay in touch, making sure that you show up in each other's lives at some level. 24:23.732 --> 24:26.466 There was a time when he would reach out and we'd go, go to. 24:26.488 --> 24:27.778 Lunch, even though he was at the. 24:27.784 --> 24:31.490 Other company, too, but that started to fade away, too. 24:31.640 --> 24:40.162 Sure, he has young kids, and we get busy with other things. It makes it more difficult to physically. 24:40.226 --> 24:42.198 Get together, but it is a process. 24:42.284 --> 24:44.454 Understanding that fade, I guess it is. 24:44.492 --> 24:47.174 A process of making new friends and. 24:47.212 --> 24:55.786 Developing those relationships and engaging this process again. And it sounds very technical, and I understand that very rarely do we sit. 24:55.808 --> 24:57.434 Down and make a list of, this. 24:57.472 --> 25:01.578 Is how I'm going to make a friend today. You know what I mean? 25:01.664 --> 25:02.714 We don't do that. 25:02.832 --> 25:05.214 But if we're conscious of the process. 25:05.412 --> 25:16.580 And we're aware of the process and we know our part, we know we have a part to play in this, it can be more effective and we can develop deeper relationships, I think. 25:17.110 --> 25:17.618 Yeah. 25:17.704 --> 25:32.630 Like I said, my natural tendency is not to make friends, and it's not a good thing. It's somewhere advantageous for health and fun and so many of things, or. 25:32.780 --> 25:36.600 Yeah, helping out with things or helping other people with. 25:38.270 --> 25:53.898 Definitely why I was talking about this with my lessons from Lucy, how Barry's dog was always making friends all the time, no thought of it whatsoever. 25:54.074 --> 25:57.150 That kind of what prompted me to want to talk about this. 25:57.220 --> 25:57.840 Yeah. 25:58.690 --> 26:06.258 What we've done so far is we've intentionally identified people that have similar interest. 26:06.344 --> 26:08.098 I guess we'll call those potential friends. 26:08.184 --> 26:08.820 Right. 26:09.510 --> 26:12.770 People who have similar interests. And that's where we start. 26:12.840 --> 26:18.518 Clubs and teams and groups, like minded people, a sporting event, some kind of. 26:18.524 --> 26:20.994 Tech meetup like you talked about, podcasting. 26:21.122 --> 26:23.030 Then we have to build a connection. 26:23.450 --> 26:25.142 We have to show interest in that. 26:25.196 --> 26:28.482 Person as a human being and share our own stories. 26:28.546 --> 26:30.874 It's about a give and take. And then we start to deepen that. 26:30.912 --> 26:40.826 Relationship by becoming just a little bit vulnerable, grabbing a drink, taking a walk together, hanging out, watching a game, whatever it might be. 26:40.848 --> 26:41.962 But you got to stay in touch. 26:42.016 --> 26:43.294 Right? We talked about that. 26:43.332 --> 26:45.950 You got to stay in touch and be consistent. 26:46.290 --> 26:48.926 You're basically turning an acquaintance into a. 26:48.948 --> 26:56.194 Friend at this point. And then you kind of establish this mutual respect. You don't have to be clones of each other. 26:56.232 --> 26:56.770 Right. 26:56.920 --> 27:04.290 You have to respect their opinion and respect their time and their commitments. Don't get overbearing. 27:05.510 --> 27:07.206 People have their own life and their. 27:07.228 --> 27:12.326 Own pace, and you have to be sensitive to that. 27:12.428 --> 27:15.894 Yeah. They got to stand up for your. 27:15.932 --> 27:21.640 Friend no matter what, even if they're in the wrong. I can remember that from school. 27:22.030 --> 27:24.634 I would go to blows with any. 27:24.672 --> 27:37.582 Of my friends that I played ball with. Right. If they were going against somebody. Know, as you were talking, Joe, it's interesting. I think one thing I lack is. 27:37.636 --> 27:40.606 Looking for opportunity to make, you know. 27:40.628 --> 27:46.590 I was down in Lowe's today and across like three or four aisles. 27:46.670 --> 27:52.562 This guy was standing there with a little puppy, a golden retriever, and this. 27:52.616 --> 27:54.862 Dog was sitting perfectly. 27:55.006 --> 27:56.322 And I had a pretty good idea. 27:56.376 --> 27:59.734 He was probably there for training as a service dog was my first thought. 27:59.772 --> 28:02.034 Because I could even from a distance. 28:02.082 --> 28:17.530 Tell that he had one of those vests on. And this dog was sitting so perfectly. And you know how much I love animals and dogs especially, and I made a beeline to this guy. I just had to talk to him. I just had to say, my gosh. 28:17.870 --> 28:21.980 What a beautiful dog and how well behaved he was. 28:22.670 --> 28:24.718 I found out he's twelve weeks old. 28:24.884 --> 28:28.186 And I was just, and had a nice chat and found out that it's. 28:28.218 --> 28:31.582 A service company and he's fostering this dog. 28:31.636 --> 28:32.910 He'll have to give him up. 28:33.060 --> 28:38.914 But they're an organization that is close to my community, which I didn't know about, so I may be checking that. 28:38.952 --> 28:41.394 Out, and that'd be a great place. 28:41.432 --> 28:42.834 To make new friends. 28:43.032 --> 28:43.780 Yeah. 28:44.950 --> 28:48.546 But again, here's you recognizing that you. 28:48.568 --> 28:50.422 Probably need to be a little more intentional about it. 28:50.476 --> 28:50.694 Absolutely. 28:50.732 --> 28:52.134 I got to be more forward. 28:52.332 --> 28:55.766 And that's a good point. And when we talk about bringing the. 28:55.788 --> 28:58.998 People into our lives, this friendship that. 28:59.004 --> 29:01.366 You and I have was an intentional friendship. 29:01.558 --> 29:02.074 All right. 29:02.112 --> 29:04.938 We kind of showed up on a Saturday morning, felt each other out a. 29:04.944 --> 29:12.542 Little bit, and said, okay, this is somebody that I intentionally want to bring and at some point keep in my life. 29:12.676 --> 29:13.214 Right. 29:13.332 --> 29:24.530 And we do that sometimes. We have our cousins as friends when we're younger or we have the people that just happen to be in the neighborhood. 29:24.870 --> 29:25.378 Right. 29:25.464 --> 29:30.180 And those are kind of friends by accident, for sure. 29:30.550 --> 29:32.290 But we can be intentional about the friends. 29:32.360 --> 29:34.722 And I think it's even more important. 29:34.776 --> 29:36.274 To be intentional about the friends you. 29:36.312 --> 29:40.054 Make and the people you bring into your life. 29:40.172 --> 29:43.590 Are they going to build you up? Are they going to encourage you? 29:43.740 --> 29:55.786 Are they the type of person that will accept your encouragement and you building them up? Do you have some kind of common focus and willingness to help and to. 29:55.808 --> 29:57.340 Be intentional about that? 29:59.630 --> 30:02.094 I think it's more important now than. 30:02.132 --> 30:04.638 Ever, especially in our digital age, where. 30:04.724 --> 30:06.218 We can tend to be isolated. 30:06.314 --> 30:13.780 Yeah, for sure. Isolation is a horrible thing. It is not good for anybody. 30:15.510 --> 30:16.914 So, yeah, let's stop right there. 30:16.952 --> 30:22.770 We've talked about kind of identifying the need to make friends and potential friends. 30:22.840 --> 30:29.798 And building a connection and kind of deepening that connection or being a little more vulnerable and intimate and make sure. 30:29.964 --> 30:32.486 You'Ve established mutual respect for each other. 30:32.588 --> 30:37.970 And honor who that individual is. And you do those things and you're off to a really good friendship. 30:38.130 --> 30:39.894 But it doesn't stop there, right? 30:40.012 --> 30:43.034 It doesn't stop there. You may have made a friend and. 30:43.152 --> 30:44.730 Started the ball rolling. 30:45.310 --> 30:50.362 Now you got to be a good friend for a long term relationship. You got to be a good friend. 30:50.416 --> 30:52.382 And we're going to talk about that next week. Fair enough. 30:52.436 --> 30:52.798 Yeah. 30:52.884 --> 30:56.734 More you give. Think you're going to get more back, too? 30:56.932 --> 30:57.680 Absolutely. 30:58.690 --> 31:00.426 How about your win for the week, Kurt? 31:00.538 --> 31:02.602 So a friend of mine, Joe Taylor. 31:02.666 --> 31:09.674 Told me about a Kanban board that he bought. 31:09.802 --> 31:12.642 I think he got it at Home Depot, if I remember right. 31:12.776 --> 31:13.330 I did. 31:13.400 --> 31:14.674 He told me it was a two. 31:14.712 --> 31:17.174 By three, and I told him it was a two by four. 31:17.292 --> 31:34.214 Right. But I went over distance and measurements and spatial, what do they call that? Spatial whatever is not my strong suit. Right. I was the guy in baseball, Kurt, that my depth perception is horrible. 31:34.262 --> 31:34.860 Right? 31:35.390 --> 31:42.222 I could never figure out whether it was dropping in front of me or going over my head. Okay, 50% of the time I was wrong, but go ahead. I'm sorry. 31:42.276 --> 31:43.866 I was a very good center fielder. 31:43.898 --> 31:47.840 So I was much better at that. 31:48.210 --> 31:50.510 But, yeah, I went down to Lowe's. 31:52.130 --> 31:54.062 You gave me the inspiration because I was looking around. 31:54.116 --> 31:56.490 It's funny. And I was at staples looking at. 31:56.500 --> 31:59.346 The prices, and then I was in. 31:59.368 --> 32:03.074 Lowe's all the time, and I looked at oh, they had one and it was like $10. 32:03.272 --> 32:05.346 But Home Depot was close to my house. 32:05.368 --> 32:27.514 I didn't buy it down there and I ended up getting one. So I've got it installed behind me and I was thinking where could I put it because my office is just stuffed. I got shelves, I got things on the wall. I was trying to think what was going to have to leave for. I could put my kanban board up and it's two sided. It has a chalkboard on the other side. 32:27.632 --> 32:28.010 Right. 32:28.080 --> 32:29.802 And it's got the whiteboard on one side. 32:29.856 --> 32:33.806 It's erasable marker board. But I use it to put my. 32:33.828 --> 32:45.998 Post it notes and start my Kanban board. But I put it over my door. I got those sticky tape where it sticks to what? It's got little fingers on it. So it sticks together. 32:46.164 --> 32:46.962 Oh yeah. 32:47.016 --> 32:50.654 That's how I put mine up. Yeah, the double sided tape. 32:50.782 --> 32:52.110 Like those commander. 32:52.190 --> 32:53.346 Yeah, that's what they're called. 32:53.448 --> 32:54.850 Yeah, those commander things. 32:54.920 --> 32:56.322 So far mine's standing up. 32:56.376 --> 32:56.594 Yeah. 32:56.632 --> 33:06.594 You got one in your hand there. So far it's staying there. And I'm starting to put some tasks on my board. So thank you, Joe. I've got that set up yesterday. 33:06.722 --> 33:16.506 Yeah, it's really cool. It's only $8 and I looked for one because I just was intended to use my wall and my post it. 33:16.528 --> 33:17.686 Notes just weren't sticking. 33:17.718 --> 33:18.938 And I think it had to do. 33:19.104 --> 33:21.382 Know the texture of the wall and so forth. 33:21.446 --> 33:29.134 And it's not designed for that. So I was at Home Depot and happened to find this four x two. 33:29.332 --> 33:32.174 Well, I cut it to whiteboard and works. 33:32.372 --> 33:34.890 I cut mine down to 30 inches tall. 33:35.050 --> 33:35.518 Okay. 33:35.604 --> 33:36.486 I didn't want to go all the. 33:36.488 --> 33:40.482 Way down to the floor. 4ft. How many tasks am I put on there? 33:40.616 --> 33:41.714 If you put it on the back. 33:41.752 --> 33:45.586 Of your board, my door forces you. 33:45.608 --> 33:47.294 To look at it every time you leave your office. 33:47.352 --> 33:47.670 Right? 33:47.740 --> 33:48.502 That's right. 33:48.636 --> 33:52.630 That's pretty cool. I don't know if you did that on purpose, but that's a pretty good strategy. 33:53.050 --> 34:02.746 Well, it was the only place I had. It was either that or move my poster. My isle of white poster that Kevin Curtis Allen gave me. 34:02.848 --> 34:03.594 Yeah. 34:03.792 --> 34:07.482 So you bought your kanban board. That's awesome. 34:07.616 --> 34:09.466 It's all hung and working. 34:09.648 --> 34:12.006 My win for the week is I reviewed. 34:12.038 --> 34:18.686 I took the past week and reviewed and reset some big rocks at work. Now if you want to know what. 34:18.708 --> 34:21.726 We'Re talking about, big rocks, go back. 34:21.748 --> 34:23.646 And listen to our episode. I think it was the one right. 34:23.668 --> 34:26.138 Before this about time management and can. 34:26.164 --> 34:27.362 We really manage time? 34:27.416 --> 34:29.746 And we talk about big rocks and. 34:29.768 --> 34:31.122 Putting in the big rocks first. 34:31.176 --> 34:33.474 And I realized a lot of small. 34:33.512 --> 34:35.540 Rocks were in my activity at work. 34:36.070 --> 34:39.718 And my team was dealing with a. 34:39.724 --> 34:41.094 Lot of small rocks, some of that. 34:41.132 --> 34:47.800 Even sand and pebbles and some of it even water. And you're like, this is just not. 34:48.170 --> 34:49.482 The way it's supposed to be. 34:49.536 --> 34:51.594 So I reviewed and reset some big. 34:51.632 --> 35:03.646 Rocks at work, met with my team, and we simplified a few processes to provide focus. And everybody's pretty excited about it. In fact, one person brought up that they felt that they were kind of. 35:03.668 --> 35:05.214 Floundering a little bit. 35:05.412 --> 35:06.526 So when I was able to take. 35:06.548 --> 35:12.586 A step back, and quite honestly, that episode forced me to do that, brought. 35:12.618 --> 35:14.894 It to top of mind again that I need to think about the big. 35:14.932 --> 35:16.766 Rocks and put the big rocks in. 35:16.788 --> 35:19.874 First and everything else will kind of find its place. So that's my win for the week. 35:19.912 --> 35:21.954 Awesome. Yeah, we were talking about this on. 35:21.992 --> 35:24.466 Saturday, and I know you put a. 35:24.488 --> 35:27.826 Program together too, that emphasized the importance. 35:27.858 --> 35:29.810 Of those big priorities. 35:29.970 --> 35:30.550 I did. 35:30.620 --> 35:31.382 Good job. 35:31.516 --> 35:32.440 Love it. 35:33.050 --> 35:34.390 How about a resource? 35:35.610 --> 35:38.994 My wife, over the years, is surprisingly. 35:39.042 --> 35:41.574 Good at buying gifts. 35:41.702 --> 35:44.074 And whether it's Christmas or this past. 35:44.112 --> 35:46.074 Week was my birthday, she was over. 35:46.112 --> 35:48.934 Do you have BJ's wholesale clubs in your area, Joe? 35:48.982 --> 35:49.434 We do not. 35:49.472 --> 35:51.558 We have Sam's and Costco. 35:51.654 --> 35:53.006 Well, not that it matters, because I. 35:53.028 --> 35:56.286 Did find this in Amazon link, which. 35:56.308 --> 36:03.760 I put in our notes. And I don't know if I can explain this. The name, probably everybody knows this about this thing except for me. 36:04.370 --> 36:06.010 But I know a friend of ours. 36:06.090 --> 36:20.470 When we went on vacation on his phone, he would have one of those battery packs with an elastic band wrapped around it. Sometimes I would borrow it. And that's how you connected it to your phone to get extra battery juice. Well, this one's called a snap plus juice pack mini. 36:20.810 --> 36:23.366 The brand name is Mophie, but it. 36:23.388 --> 36:27.474 Uses that Magsafe magnet that connects and. 36:27.532 --> 36:30.154 Attaches this battery pack to your phone. 36:30.192 --> 36:32.874 And she also bought me a new. 36:32.912 --> 36:40.442 Case that holds it, and there's a little magnet in there. So you take the snap juice pack. 36:40.496 --> 36:45.514 And you stick it on there and you can charge your phone, and it sticks right on the back with a magnet. 36:45.642 --> 36:46.442 No kidding. 36:46.506 --> 36:48.094 It's pretty cool. 36:48.212 --> 36:50.154 So you just take this little charger. 36:50.202 --> 36:53.118 That you have, it holds it on. 36:53.124 --> 36:59.842 The back of your phone and that magnetic process, and that's how wireless charging is done now, right? 36:59.896 --> 37:00.594 That's right. 37:00.712 --> 37:03.826 That magnetic process charges it right up. You don't have to plug it into the. 37:03.848 --> 37:04.420 Correct. 37:04.870 --> 37:06.082 That's awesome. Correct. 37:06.136 --> 37:07.138 That's very cool. 37:07.224 --> 37:17.000 Check the link in our notes if you're interested. She got a nice deal because the one in Amazon, at least this particular, there's probably other brands, but there was $40, and she got it on sale for 20. 37:17.530 --> 37:18.326 Well done. 37:18.428 --> 37:21.654 Again, really nifty little gift from my wife that's going to be coming handy. 37:21.702 --> 37:26.314 On our trip down to Disney World, for sure. Because all that social media I'm doing. 37:26.352 --> 37:31.710 When I'm taking pictures and videos, you have burns that battery. 37:33.410 --> 37:34.510 It's funny. 37:35.410 --> 37:42.414 My wife, I think, just bought a wired charger, and if it's still within. 37:42.452 --> 37:44.814 The return period, I might check this out. 37:44.932 --> 37:48.434 I'll tell you, the biggest mistake I make is to forget to charge it. 37:48.472 --> 37:50.098 In the middle of the night, like. 37:50.184 --> 38:01.282 Get back tired or just Disney. You get exhausted at night. You forget to do things. You fall asleep, head hits the pill. I'm sleeping, wake up, and the phone's battery is dead. 38:01.346 --> 38:08.006 I carry a big battery pack in my backpack, in my laptop backpack, and. 38:08.028 --> 38:09.414 There'S a cord that comes from my. 38:09.452 --> 38:12.454 Backpack, from the inside of my backpack to the outside. 38:12.572 --> 38:13.250 Okay. 38:13.420 --> 38:17.322 That allows me to plug into it, and that has been a real game. 38:17.376 --> 38:19.082 Changer for me because I have power. 38:19.136 --> 38:25.014 And it's pretty stout. This has days and days of charge. 38:25.062 --> 38:27.150 Okay. This one we were asking. 38:27.220 --> 38:41.810 She goes, I'll just use yours. I'll say, why don't you get one of those? Go down to BJ's for $20, get one yourself. I said to her, she goes, I'll just use yours. I said, I don't know how many charges this thing's got in it. It pretty much doesn't tell you on the packaging. 38:42.950 --> 38:44.898 My resource is a book. 38:45.064 --> 38:49.602 It's a book that goes way back, and it's dated. And I'm surprised somebody hasn't. 38:49.666 --> 38:52.466 It may have actually been updated. I'm surprised somebody hasn't. 38:52.498 --> 38:55.160 It might even be in the common. 38:55.530 --> 38:59.746 What do they call that when something is so old? It's part of the public. It's public domain. 38:59.778 --> 38:59.974 Right? 39:00.012 --> 39:01.190 It's public domain. 39:01.710 --> 39:04.490 Answered my question. You worked it out, Joe. 39:06.510 --> 39:09.946 By the way, I still don't know who Han Solo was. 39:10.128 --> 39:10.426 Who? 39:10.448 --> 39:11.814 The actor that played Han Solo. 39:11.862 --> 39:15.082 Oh, I meant to text you. It popped in my head the other day. Harrison Ford. 39:15.146 --> 39:20.798 Harrison Ford. There we go. I've intentionally not looked it up. I was just waiting for it to come. 39:20.884 --> 39:25.642 I meant to text you that. Glad we got that fixed. 39:25.786 --> 39:28.286 This book is maybe in the public domain. 39:28.318 --> 39:30.722 And if you get this book, work. 39:30.776 --> 39:36.786 Through some of the language. Right. Work through some of the. It's by no means vulgar or anything like that. I'm not talking about language in that way. 39:36.808 --> 39:39.778 But it does have some, I don't. 39:39.794 --> 39:42.662 Want to call it archaic, but language of the time. Right. 39:42.716 --> 39:46.502 And when you read this book, understand that the time this person was living in. 39:46.636 --> 39:49.190 But the principles are timeless. 39:49.350 --> 39:53.062 The principles are universal. And it's by Dale Carnegie. 39:53.126 --> 39:55.034 How to win friends and influence people. 39:55.152 --> 39:55.530 Yeah. 39:55.600 --> 40:06.734 It's one of those seminal books that almost everybody that I know of significant success at some point has read this book. 40:06.772 --> 40:10.846 Yeah, I think I read that about 40 years ago. It would be a good book to. 40:10.948 --> 40:13.646 I didn't realize, as you're describing a. 40:13.668 --> 40:21.330 Book that the language is a little different. Whatever. However you described it, I thought maybe it was simple. 40:21.480 --> 40:22.686 Well, it is simple language. 40:22.718 --> 40:25.010 What I mean is it's language of the day. 40:25.080 --> 40:25.362 Yeah. 40:25.416 --> 40:31.558 Okay. And they probably make some references to some things. The language we may not completely use. 40:31.644 --> 40:32.278 Okay. 40:32.444 --> 40:35.622 It's not archaic, but it's definitely of the time. 40:35.676 --> 40:36.374 Right. 40:36.572 --> 40:44.858 One thing that profoundly sticks out to me. You remember, I always say there's always something from really books that I enjoy that something sticks with me. 40:45.024 --> 40:51.566 The one about that book that sticks with me is the importance of when. 40:51.588 --> 41:07.140 You'Re talking to someone to make them feel important or let them talk and ask questions about them. Instead of putting yourself, everything about yourself, make it about them. Make the conversation about them. 41:07.590 --> 41:10.206 Stephen Covey, in his book seven habits. 41:10.238 --> 41:12.046 Of highly effective people, which we've referenced. 41:12.078 --> 41:20.950 Many times over the past couple episodes, puts it kind of like this. He says, seek first to understand, then to be understood. 41:21.450 --> 41:25.218 And I think of people that really, I enjoy meeting. 41:25.314 --> 41:33.660 They're really good at that. Just naturally, I don't think they're trying to do it. They ask you questions about yourself. They seem to be interested in you. 41:34.430 --> 41:35.130 Yeah. 41:35.280 --> 41:41.706 There are people that do it naturally because of their upbringing, I think. So it might be. But also you can be intentional about it. 41:41.728 --> 41:42.314 Yeah, for sure. 41:42.352 --> 41:46.270 You can decide, I'm going to be this type of person. I think it's a good skill in other people. 41:46.340 --> 41:46.910 Yeah. 41:47.060 --> 41:48.574 One thing that I remember from that. 41:48.612 --> 41:56.642 Book is, and I leafed through it recently and I thought, man, this would be a good thing to dig into. 41:56.776 --> 41:58.980 Again, very similar to what you said. 41:59.990 --> 42:03.826 Is use their name. 42:04.008 --> 42:04.740 Right. 42:05.290 --> 42:08.870 Call people by their name and use their name. Remember their name. 42:08.940 --> 42:14.966 Yeah. Unless you're the cable person at the help center. 42:15.068 --> 42:19.734 Yeah. From Dave Berry's book. Yeah. 42:19.932 --> 42:23.118 Then it becomes annoying, and then it becomes fake. 42:23.314 --> 42:32.122 Then it becomes obnoxious. Before we started recording here, I had noticed in Kurt's notes on today's show that he did not share in advance. 42:32.186 --> 42:40.270 What his quote of the day is going to be, and he said that he did that purposefully to make it a surprise. 42:40.850 --> 42:44.446 So for the past 45 minutes, man. 42:44.548 --> 42:46.078 I've been waiting for this moment. 42:46.164 --> 42:50.482 I'm going to give you three rapid fire. And there's a reason, I guess I. 42:50.616 --> 42:54.546 Thought it'd be fun to do it this way. I take my wife everywhere, but she. 42:54.568 --> 43:09.622 Keeps finding her way back. I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug. I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want to interrupt her. So that's Henny Youngman and Rodney dangerfield. 43:09.766 --> 43:10.460 Awesome. 43:13.390 --> 43:20.990 I was going to go Henny Youngman. I think he's the one that said, take my wife, please take my wife. 43:23.250 --> 43:30.458 So when you were going to talk about relationships, I thought I'd go a little on the comedy side with Henny and Rodney. 43:30.634 --> 43:35.282 Well, mine's kind of funny, too. And I think about, am I the type of person. 43:35.416 --> 43:37.026 Am I the type of person when. 43:37.048 --> 44:04.020 We talk about kind of step one, for lack of a better term, and making friends, and that's identifying potential friends. Join clubs or groups. You're a good guy, right? This quote, I love this quote. I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member. 44:08.200 --> 44:09.524 Who is that from? 44:09.642 --> 44:11.060 Groucho marks. 44:12.600 --> 44:13.492 That makes sense. 44:13.546 --> 44:23.172 Now, there is some wisdom in that, right? There is some wisdom in that. I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member. If you go to join these clubs. 44:23.236 --> 44:27.864 My gosh, make sure you're the type. 44:27.902 --> 44:30.170 Of person that people want to be friends with. Right. 44:31.340 --> 44:32.164 I don't know how. 44:32.222 --> 44:37.470 I wonder why Mark said that. Maybe he's just trying to be funny. I guess. 44:37.920 --> 44:38.968 That is funny. 44:39.064 --> 44:40.412 That is funny. I love that. 44:40.466 --> 44:42.130 I love that stuff by. 44:42.500 --> 44:48.128 Rodney Dangerfield has some great stuff, dude. I mean, he has some funny, funny stuff. 44:48.294 --> 44:50.864 And if you look back at his. 44:50.902 --> 44:52.544 Story, his story is pretty rough. 44:52.592 --> 44:54.900 He's like a lot of comedians. 44:57.560 --> 45:01.108 His background is know. 45:01.194 --> 45:03.636 Check it out. It's pretty interesting. 45:03.818 --> 45:05.056 Kurt, I think we're going to wrap. 45:05.088 --> 45:06.788 Up right there for today's show. 45:06.874 --> 45:08.624 Sounds good. Good job, Joe. 45:08.752 --> 45:17.736 Yeah, my friend. Next week? Yeah, definitely next week. We'll talk about being a good friend. We'll talk about some of the ideas behind being a good friend and the. 45:17.758 --> 45:20.556 Philosophies and not to be technical about. 45:20.578 --> 45:22.430 It, but there is a process and. 45:22.880 --> 45:24.764 There are some boxes to check off. 45:24.882 --> 45:27.688 If you're being a good friend, we'll. 45:27.704 --> 45:28.636 Do that next week. 45:28.738 --> 45:32.224 The book I'm reading right now is being your best self. 45:32.422 --> 45:34.256 And I'll tell you when I'm being. 45:34.278 --> 45:36.210 My best self, I'm being a good friend. 45:36.820 --> 45:39.824 That'll preach right there as we go. 45:39.862 --> 45:51.572 Our website is dudesinprogress.com. Dudesinprogress.com if you want to reach out to us, you can send us an email. Dudes@dudesinprogress.com dudes@dudesinprogress.com if you see fit to. 45:51.626 --> 45:53.716 Want to support the show, you can. 45:53.738 --> 45:56.836 Certainly do that by going to dudesinprogress.com. 45:57.018 --> 46:06.872 Support dudesandprogress.com support that'll take you to our Patreon page. And if you want to engage with us with like minded people that listen. 46:06.926 --> 46:08.636 To the show and interact about the. 46:08.658 --> 46:10.476 Show and talk about the show, you. 46:10.498 --> 46:23.984 Can do that on our Facebook page, dudesinprogress.com slash Facebook. Dudesinprogress.com slash Facebook. So if you just remember to go to the website dudesandprogress.com, that website will. 46:24.022 --> 46:31.616 Take you to all those places, including the most recent episodes. So, Kurt, as we depart, I hope. 46:31.638 --> 46:33.836 You have a blast in Disney. I know you will. 46:33.878 --> 46:41.510 You'll be with some good friends, good friends that you've nurtured and cultured, and you've made good friends by being a good friend. 46:42.120 --> 46:52.856 Let's continue to make progress in making good friends because progress is better than perfection. We don't have to be a perfect friend, but we do have to make progress in being a friend. Let's keep moving forward. 46:52.958 --> 47:06.916 Yeah. Thanks, Joe. And I'm looking forward to seeing my friends. It's made my trips to Disney world incredibly fun, and I always have a great time seeing my friends, the old friends down at Disney World. Thanks, Joe. 47:07.028 --> 47:07.400 Awesome. 47:07.470 --> 47:07.990 Talk to you soon.